Cut the cord, and being you

• Posted by Donna V March 13, 2014 1,031 views
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  Just an update, ..So I was planning to transition at work and things seemed to be going okay , then as often in happens life something just happens and it did . It kind of goes like this , I always had a bit of a strained relationship with my immediate boss, he being a control freak opinionated and to my mind judgemental   ,me being a bit polar opposite always ready to accept and be flexible non judgemental .

  So over the last 3 months I made the disclosures to my immediate management that I needed to transistion etc. I had my doubts if my boss was REALLY  as willing to accept me going forward, whilst appearing to say all the  right things in our meetings with HR and my departmental boss  to plan my transition and how it should be communicated. Everything seemed to be in place. Then 2 weeks ago after a very,very hectic work schedule [ no time for Donna] , I got ask to drop everything and sort things out in Germany , so I did,but thought I got no help from my boss aside from excuses. I got the flu , and he insisted that I should carry on working and help him out when I returned with a lot of customer visits [ get up at 5  get home at 9Pm] . I did this , and "soldiered on" . A low point came when at 7.30pm still working , he tells me he is exasperrated by me , as I am not communicating to him and asking for help. I tell him I thought he was busy , and said I was still suffering from the flu. he did not accept this. Next day I have a  planned meeting with HR my Boss and manager , to agree the prepared statements and communications , These were all fine as I had worked with HR a lot to prepare and personalize and circulted to my boss for comment  .My Boss was tasked with arranging to communicate my transition to other parts of the company. He said "I can handle this",but never spoke to me about it . Feeling not at my best , and basically feeling really put down , I said there where issues with my working relationship with my boss that needed to be resolved .   I also told them that for me it was difficult putting up a front, and that i needed a break , pointing out that effectively for someone transitioning , its like a resignation and a re-engaging and everyone (includng me ) having the time to understand and accept me as Donna.i felt like I was being boxed up

  There were a couple of meetings organised with HR as mutually my Boss and me  agreed there was a Communication breakdown . Its not good when you find you are a polar counter balance . 

  cutting to the chase ..... I handed my resignation in and thats it . a month to go and I leave.

  The AIr is cleared 

  I have had time to speak to our HR director as "no surprise" she seems able to listen to Donna. Meanwhile my Boss seems to be avoiding coming into the office, and was off all this week with Flu. My boss is alright at heart with good intentions, BUT .. he says I am too sensitve and misinterpret things and read meanings into things . mmmh  .

  Maybe this is true ,

  Not sure What I will do next. now that I have jumped the cage  and cut the cord that secured me ,  ...but I think it is the right life  decision for me . Donna .   .  BTW Best wishes to Emma G and Ellle F for your comments