A journey 's End

• Posted by Karen Elena Tea April 17, 2015 860 views
  click to rate

  I would  like to  first offer  my  full Apollogie to thoes  who  read my  blogs and  to thoes  who have  supported  me. I would  like to  talk about a  journey that  I talked  about  here in my  blogs. I  am refuring to  my  relationship with  my  Gf from  Russia. As  difficult as it  is  for  me , I  have  ended  my  relationship with  this  person with a  very  heavy heart. I will  admit I  had some doubts  about getting this  person  to  come  to  Canada . I  know some of you  girls  have  said  this would  not work out  for the  best and  I  dont  put  blame  on  no one. it has occured  to  me that  both  Elena  and I  are  simply  victumes  of the  times and  or  our  countries  politices. We  have tried  to  make this work  and  I  hoped  it would  but there are  too  many  difficuties  to  over come . We  started  off  as  just  pen pals that  as  time went  on  became  more  of a love affair. We  both  had  something to  offer  one and other as  I  looked  at the  "big picture" . I wanted  to  work  because not  that  I  do  love  her  but because  she was  to  fullfill  a  big  part  of my  life that was  missing . I  ve  never  got  the  opertunaties  like most  have  to  date someone . I  ve  never  been  in this  romantic  position  befor not like this . I  have  been in grade  school and  it  left  a  bad  tast  in my  opinion . As young kids  and  into  our adulthood  we  dont  realise that  someday  we  need  someone  in our  lives  to  love . I  spent  a  good  portion  of  my  life trying to  take  care of  my  health issues to the point that  I  never took the time  to  fall in love with someone. Time  and  time again growing up  I  heard  everyone  say  "you  have  to  look after  yourself" so this  is what  I  did  from the  age of 12  til  now . The  sad  fact  is that  it  took  a  heart attack in 2010 and  bipass surgey to  drive  home the  fact  I  need  someone  to  love  befor  its too  late. I  have  no  regreats of what  I  did  for this  person in regards  of  finacial  help . Its  been  said you  can t  take it  with you  when you  go and  how  I  feel  now  is  going ....where  I dont  know . I am  hurt but  not  biter at  her  or  I but at the situation we  both  found  ourselves  in . I will  do  as I  always  have looked  after  myself  and  continue  on but this  journey  is  now at an end .