Forums » Transgender Youth (18 -25s)

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    • June 11, 2016 2:57 AM BST
    • Lovely GG Lisa - So glad to hear you are enjoying all the posts and so am I lol. :) As far as your interests go, I've heard that's actually pretty normal to fantasize. In fact, my mom would always try to get me to believe that's why I looked at porn. I just wanted to be the girls in the porn, but of course that was not really the case at all. I'm also glad to hear if you were single, you believe you'd be willing to date trans because as I've said in the past, I've wished for more pansexuals in the world since losing the guy previously mentioned. 

    • June 10, 2016 12:29 AM BST
    • This is the good part of having new members here, that spend the time to read through the forum threads & then find a new perspective offering a different insight to the topic. It can then revive the thread getting other members to re-read & update a previous post.

       

      My feelings about myself have not changed since joining here, talking to people in the chatrooms (yes that used to be a thing) and forging friendships with people I have been fortunate to meet & they have enriched both of us in the process.  I still know that it is a combination of looks, personality that attract me & it still does not matter if you are pre or post op, female or male. At the end of our lives we all grow old, looks fade but the bond you create through personality, discussions and you cannot help who you end up falling in love with

    • June 9, 2016 7:29 PM BST
    • I came here because I wanted to read the latest post (Kris, thanks) and I got sucked into the whole entire thread. I'm definitely in Cristine's camp. Labels suck, but they are there so that we can explain things easier at the drop of a dime. If being transgender starts in the mind, if you feel like a woman and are attracted to men, you are straight, and if you feel like a man and are attracted to women, you are straight. Hence, if you feel like a woman and are attracted to women, you're a lesbian, and if you feel like a man and are attracted to men, you are gay. It's the biology and looking at it and working with it that might get one feeling confused, and then throw society's norms in the mix, a dash of religion, and people get even more messed up, feeling confused and guilty! But remember, it all starts in the mind...and there's nothing wrong with being gay, lesbian, bisexual, pansexual, etc! It's natural, normal, and human.

      I'm a mostly straight cisgender woman. I have an ongoing joke that I am 20% lesbian because I love looking at beautiful women's bodies and would much rather pick up a Playboy or Penthouse magazine than a Playgirl--ew, gross! Even when I was an adolescent girl I would look at those magazines and...well...this is embarrassing...but I would you know...do things with myself. I wouldn't be fantasizing about being WITH them...I was fantasizing about BEING them! Strange, I know.

      As far as dating a trans person, male or female, if I weren't married, I would totally be open to dating either sex. I've seen some very good looking trans men, so I'd be in a straight relationship...and perhaps I could explore my lesbian side with a drop dead gorgeous trans woman! (Although honestly, we'd probably end up being friends and not lovers. If only I were 50% lesbian...haha!) The biology--what's pre op or post op wouldn't matter...where there's a will there's a way! And what's wrong with just touching and cuddling? It's all about human contact and connection, anyway, right?

      If my husband were to tell me he's transgender tomorrow, and he wanted to stay with me, I wouldn't hesitate to stay. I'm sure that I would mourn his loss, mourn our sex life, but there's more to life than sex. As a cis woman, I feel that I don't need it, I've gone many year's stretch (at different times) being celibate...and I'm happy having sex with just me myself and I! (Okay now I'm blushing!)

      2 Interesting articles written by trans women,

      The Five Most Common Types of Transsexual Admirers:

      (Edit: the link doesn't show up properly, so do the following) Go to http://www.reneereyes.com, click on Meeting and Loving a Transgender Woman, then click on The People Attracted to Transsexuals, then click on Transsexual Dating!


      How Society Shames Men Who Date Trans Women & How it Affects Our Lives (VERY INSPIRATIONAL AND A MUST-READ FOR ALL):
      http://janetmock.com/2013/09/12/men-who-date-attracted-to-trans-women-stigma/

    • May 21, 2016 8:58 AM BST
    • This post really reminds me of myself because I was always attracted to girls throughout my life (middle school and on) but I dated guys that I felt close to because I felt like I "had to" since it was the "right thing" as a christian. I was from a christian family. The one guy I ended up ever having real feelings and an actual attraction for actually turned out to be a homosexual man. I am a transgender (ftm) but haven't gotten any surgery as of yet. The one guy I liked said he wouldn't date a transman though.. Still, that was the only case I could ever see myself with a guy happily. I like to consider myself a 99% straight male because of him lol.

    • March 16, 2016 2:35 PM GMT
    • Oh, yes. I've talked to them and they're okay with it, it's just a few days. Thanks for notifying me, though!

    • March 15, 2016 11:14 AM GMT
    • Hi Fenix.

      You are 4 days off being old enough to be a member here but I am sure the admin team will give you a break on that one or allow you 4 days grace before you can post again legally under the terms and conditions of GS.

       

      I try very hard to encourage more FtM's to stay here and post here but they mostly just vanish. I cannot understand why because there is a mine of information here and a dedicated moderator (Jasper). He will help you if you just give him a chance. He maybe able to help you understand why you feel the way you do.

       

      I am going to end this here for now to await to see if you return. I hope you do because if you need answers they are here somewhere.

       

      Take care , Julia x

    • March 15, 2016 9:27 AM GMT
    • So, im a soon-to-be 18 year old person who's currently is questioning my gender identity. Im not too sure if i really feel comfortable in my female body and when I imagine myself in a more masculine body I almost feel a desire for one.

      As younger, I remember that i wished to be a boy, since I didn't feel at all as the cute and sweet ideal-girl and rather wanted to be though and cool as my brothers.

      But throughout the years i have lived on being a though and cool girl, I have always felt angry and uncomfortable when someone accidentally called me by the masculine pronouns.

      The most confusing is that my feelings says one thing, but my brain says another. It sounds much easier and relevant to be a fullout male, but still i get those irritated feelings by the male pronouns...

      Id there anyone in the same position that would like to exchange thoughts and such?

    • February 24, 2016 5:30 PM GMT
    • Thank you Amanda.

       

      Back on topic. If you go the the main forum page for Transgender Youth and look 2 topics below this you will see a post by a former member. Her name was Ana and she was driven off this website by an older member. Her membership here lasted just over a week. She was a lovely girl and could have brought something to this website , she was not the only one that was driven away by older members.

       

      I can spot vulnerable people here or people with genuine problems. They are the ones that concern me.

       

      Take care , hugs , Julia xx

    • February 24, 2016 3:45 PM GMT
    • Julia, dear Julia,

      I would only ask that you do not go through (for our sake as well as yours) and do NOT even think of leaving us again. 

       

      Big hug, Amanda

       

    • February 22, 2016 11:46 PM GMT
    • Hi Amanda.

       

      Call me names but please never ever call me aggressive , I do not have an aggressive bone in my body. Make yourself a bowl of warm custard and put your hand in it , and think of me , that is how soft I am.

      At times I sound harsh , I admit that but I call it being cruel to be kind. If someone cannot figure that out by not taking the time to get to know me it really is not my fault. I can also figure out who comes here to take the piss , and yes I will let them know but if the truth hurts again that really is not my fault.

       

      I cannot and never will compare myself to Crissie but we relate to each other , we both had childhoods from hell but we survived and we both try our best to help others. Over the years Crissie has taken the time to get to know me. On a few occassions we even have a difference of opinions but that does not spoil our friendship.

       

      You Amanda? I do not care what you are wearing I care about you "The person - The human". I care about all humans that enter my life and make a mark on me , a good mark. The ones that enter my life with the sole intention to insult me and abuse me and use me as an internet punch bag can go f*ck themselves as far as I am concerned , they are beyond help.

       

      This topic?. I see far to many young people come here and never return. I have witnessed some being forced off here by older members. This website and it's members needs youth here , they are the future. I have made over 4,000 posts on this website over the years and most of them have been about caring , yes I have had some differences of opinions that have turned sour but people have to understand they are "My opinions". Also I am human so I make mistakes sometimes and if I do I admit it and apologise for them.

      Here are just two random topics of mine.

      http://gendersociety.com/forums/topic/9865/under-age-members

       

      http://gendersociety.com/forums/topic/9856/a-gs-member-emergency-fund

       

      This website is littered with them and they involve care. You see the problem is the ones that choose to use me as an internet punch bag ignore caring. People like that only care about one thing and that is themselves. I am nothing special but I spend most of my life caring about others and helping others , if that is a crime in others eyes then I gladly plead guilty.

       

      Can everyone here please make young members welcome?. Make them feel at home here. Help them and encourage them to not be afraid to ask questions. Everyone please remember we were all young once and how hard that was. Making a diffence to someones life is so rewarding.

       

      Have a listen to the words in this. Music inspires me and this is an inspiration. Two lines that ring true. If I fail if I succeed at least I live as I believe. No matter what they take away from me they can't take away my dignity https://youtu.be/IYzlVDlE72w

       

      You all take care , Julia xx

       

      Spell errors corrected.

    • February 22, 2016 8:32 PM GMT
    • Julia - your life, and mine - are invaluable.  I say this because when you seemed to leave, I worried about you.  I was not alone.

       

      You know you can be very opinionated, aggressive and, sadly self-deprecating.  So fine.  You have  noticed a long tome ago that the home page on here, sadly, is about boosting mutual self esteem..  If you have a birth mark, let's say, or if you are an old tart with spider veins, then you arenot going to cut the mustard.  However, in my view, there are several of us here who may think outside THAT envelope, so let us celebrate them - as you did with Cristine Shye.

      She - LIKE YOU - is invaluable.  A Jewel beyond price.  I do not imagine for a moment that she - and others like her - wonder what I am wearing.  What do my false tits look like - YEUGH!

       

      No.  She, Hannah and brianna just plug on - and because of the fact that I have too much Andalucian Red, have forgotten so many others.  My regrets.

      I know who you are - and I am sure that you do do too.

      I know that I can ALWAYS come back to the folks here.  Thanks!

       

    • February 21, 2016 8:47 PM GMT
    • I have posted this in Transgender Youth for a reason but it applies to all ages in some cases. There is one thing that is more important than anything else for you to have decent future and that is honesty.

      So you are trans whatever?. You need to find out firstly if what ever it is you have or who you are whether it is going to affect the rest of your life. Self diagnosis is not the best route to take so get yourself diagnosed. You thinking it is a phase or it will go away is not the right thing to be thinking.

      If your gender identity is affecting your life you need a professional to diagnose you. I am telling you this because it will not only affect your future but also the future of others. Your family and friends need to be considered too , and others that surround you.

       

      We all know what love feels like and we all know , or you should , that love is a wonderful thing , it can also hurt. Before you enter a relationship remember love can bring you closer or tear you apart. Once you have entered that relationship honesty is what will hold you together. Any relationship based lies and deception will fail.

       

      You get one life as far as I am aware so it is in my opinion best to live it as best you can and honestly. Being diagnosed as being transexual is not the end of the world , look upon it as a start. I am not saying it will be easy but being honest with yourself and others will make it that little bit more easy , you are not alone and being you is nothing to be ashamed of , it is the most natural thing in the world. Pretending you are someone you are not is not natural and is unhealthy.

       

      So consider your options first. Do you really want to fall in love and then take a big chance of losing that?. It is not an ideal way to start life as an adult (to the youth). Find out who you are and become that person and do not go thinking you will never find love. I get offers from men half my age in my day to day life but I am not looking so I dismiss them. I may play with them on the internet but then they bore me so I discard them like broken toys , after all they only want one thing (best not go there).

       

      This is about you , it is about your future. Unless you want to go through and put others through what is in the link below just stop and think about what you are doing.

      http://gendersociety.com/forums/topic/10112/divorcing-and-the-unreasonable-transexual

      You all take care and enjoy life , it is better than destroying lives.

       

      Julia xx

       

    • January 20, 2016 8:21 PM GMT
    • Counselling can be arranged via your GP in the first instance. 

      As for growing breasts, you will need hormones to do that and you cannnot choose a size. Like GG's, breasts come in all shapes and sizes so you don't actually know what you are going to end up with. 

       

    • October 6, 2015 9:34 AM BST
    • Thank you for your concern but don't worry I am not going to be rushing into this anytime soon. Even though I want it taken care of already lol I know this isn't anything to be taken lightly. Also how might I find the appropriate counseling?

    • October 6, 2015 8:52 AM BST
    • Rich night - please do not try to deal with this on your own. Get some professional help by way of counselling if you want to stay safe!

       

      Best,

      Amanda

    • October 5, 2015 11:03 PM BST
    • So I have been doing some research lately and my mind is just starting to spin around crazily and need to type some things out and get some conversation/opinions/others experiences. 

      I want to turn myself impotent I don't entirely feel like telling why because that will take forever. I also don't want to develop too big of breasts. If I grow very small ones that hide easily I am ok with that, it's not a goal. At first I was thinking about how to shrink and become impotent, which I am sure impotent will ultimately lead to shrinking but I am not concerned about it. I am a grower meaning flaccid I am only around an inch or inch and a half but erect 7inches. 

      So my research so far turned up that cock cages worn excessively will ultimately make you unable to achieve an erection. But that takes time. 

      Hormones also seems like a route to possibly go but well obviously hormones will start changing the entire body.

      A strange thing that popped up in the search as well apparently there are people who supposedly used hemorrhoid cream on there clock which supposedly restricts the blood vessels and can cause shrinking. But obviously complaints of skin irritation. That just seems like something can go wrong with that and seems iffy.

      Trauma to the testicular region can of course cause impotent as well but well first off ain't no way I can do that to myself my mind just won't let me lol and possibility of causing more injury I think than what you want. 

      I think I found other things besides what I said but I can't remember. Something I have not looked at which I need to and might need help is. The effect of impotence on Testosterone levels, possible to maintain T levels despite it or would it be a total loss. 

      And just an interesting tidbit. The Brazilian Wandering spider can give you an erection that can last hours and can lead to impotence...if it doesn't kill you. Obviously this is not a safe way to go. 

       

    • June 4, 2014 12:04 PM BST
    • "Excuse my French" means something completely different down here.

      Excuse my French is a common expression used when someone has been caught swearing.

       

    • June 1, 2014 2:25 AM BST
    • Hello Wendy ^.^

       

      Thank you for your message.

       

      I actually am not from Paris hihi, but Canada.

       

      Have a nice day. = )

    • May 30, 2014 8:22 PM BST
    • What I find amusing is I hated French until sometime after I joined GS.   Now I find it lovely.  Probably part of my denial of self growing up.   Welcoma, Ana.  What are the latest fashions in Paris?  :-)

    • May 27, 2014 1:22 AM BST
    • Aww thank you, your french is excellent hihi : )

    • May 26, 2014 2:36 PM BST
    • I wish my French was as good as your English : )

    • May 25, 2014 11:48 PM BST
    • Thank you very much for your help Cristine, very appreciated.

       

      It seems to have very wonderful people around here, I love it.

       

      Have a nice day : D

    • May 25, 2014 11:36 PM BST
    • Welcome, if you need any help finding your way around, just ask, plenty of factual and informative threads in the forums and  some very amusing ones.   Quite a few canadian girls here.


      loadsa love Cristine Shye xxxxx

    • May 25, 2014 9:42 PM BST
    • Hello all ^,^

       

      My name is Ana Stasia, from Quebec city, Canada.

       

      I'm a tranvestite/crossdresser who seriously thinks about operation.

       

      I just discovered this wonderful website and hope to meet the amazing people here.

       

      Have a nice day and don't hesitate to come say hi.

       

      Kisses xXx 

    • April 1, 2014 10:34 AM BST
    • I came out to my mom and stepdad, around the same time(same month) I live with them. They both we're very accepting. If you having loving supporting parents you will be fine.(I got lucky on that one)

      For those who arent as fortunate and have narrowminded parents/whatever you want call it... I wish the best luck and hope you figure it out. Keeping a secret like we do is not healthy.. it has messed up my thinking process completely.

      I've been out since i was 24. I'm now 26... there was couple situations at first in my head i was like why did I come out? this is so embarrassing. But that was very rare. 99% of the time, I feel much happier then I ever did before I came out.

      Hopefully this info can help someone that is unsure. I know its very hard... I only wish you luck in the endeavour.

    • February 21, 2014 3:04 AM GMT
    • You live in a day and age where sexual and gender expression is pretty open. Keep all gender bending activity off the street and in your home with curtains drawn shut, so I think the primary and most important thing to do is to find your sexual solemate. It's great to explore yourself and have peace with who and what you are if you allow labels to describe you. Take your time and find exactly who you are looking for, never failing to be upfront and honest with regard to your real gender identity and your real sexual preference. Someday you'll be in a living and sexual realtionship with your soulmate, and if you don't rush or walk away from things you'll later regret because you were just afraid to do it. If you have a partner that could find you doing whatever it is that like doing and would either join you or at least aprrove. Its when you think "if I were caught doing this, and how would my partner see me? Is this a person that you really find attractive. The fact that my wife does not have a penis and it doesn't slow us down. The point being that when you are in long term relationships, it should be with the right person who accepts everything about you after you level with him or her.

    • February 18, 2014 9:49 PM GMT
    • You're 19 and ready to give up, or so you say.  I know the feeling well.  I had attempted suicide 3 times before I was in high school.  I'm in my 50's today and only had my surgery a few years ago.

       

      Money is a big problem for a lot of us as well as family acceptance.  Here's what I would recommend and that you take things a step at a time as you are able to do them.

       

      1.  Work on getting your degree.  That is the single most important thing you need to do to secure an income for yourself and to finance your transition.

      2.  Cultivate your social circle of transpeople.  Don't stop with online communities like this.  Find others like you in your area. 

      3.  Study the issues of transition.  You are in charge of your health issues.  You must be well informed to make the decisions you need to do.

      4.  Start investing in the market.  Some of what your gains should be is passive income and the skills you learn in this area now will help you in the years ahead, including the middle period of transition which is typically the most dangerous.

      5.  Experiment on your look.  This takes time with anyone.  You won't be an exception.

      6.  Examine your own spirituality and philosophy.  These things will carry you through difficult times.

      7.  Get involved in activism.  You need to fulfill the needs of others as well as your own.

      8.  Cultivate humor.  A sunny outlook and offbeat sense of reality contributes much to survival.

      9.  Find other transpeople starting out. This may appear out of your league at first.  But you may find someone like that in a year who also needs your help.  It's part of the circle of connectedness.

      10.  Meditate upon the meaning of why you want to be the person you envision.  Identity is at the core of who we are and one must come to terms with why it is so.  That is different for everyone and it will be unique to you.

       

      Blessings

    • February 18, 2014 4:01 PM GMT
    • Hello and thank you so much for sharing.

       

      First off let me give you a virtual hug - it is going to be okay.  You are with people who understand you.

       

      Gender dysphoria is a very, very difficult thing for anyone to go through.  What you are experiencing is normal for someone suffering with the condition.  I did represses my gender dysphoria and denied it until - well recently (I will be celebrating my 3rd 39th birthday next month).  At the onset of puberty however I began experiencing horrible and debilitating bouts of depression - and had dirt-low self esteem.  Seeing a therapist helped a lot - even though I never spoke about gender dysphoria.  The therapist at that time did notice I struggled a lot with my sense of identity however and that I was trying to live too much in the image others expected of me.  

       

      This is a bit off topic - but studying the martial arts helped a lot too.  It gave me an endorphin rush - which helped me out of depression.  Kept me physically fit.  Built my self-esteem and allowed an outlet for me to vent my frustrations. 

       

      You are at least ahead of where I was - you realize that your gender identity is not matching your physical gender.  

       

      I would recommend seeing a therapist first off.  Do an internet search and see if there are any therapists in your area that specialize in gender dysphoria and transgender issues.  The advice that you have received about fiinding a support group is also very good.  A therapist and support group can help guide you on your journey.  They may be able to point you toward social services available for transgendered women as well.

       

      This is where I am at with my journey and will be going through the intake process to see a therapist at a local clinic that specializes in gender dysphoria.

       

      Hang in there - you are young with so much to experience!

       

      Hugs!

       

      -Morinth

       

    • February 15, 2014 11:55 PM GMT
    • Thank you so much for your support. It just gets frustrating, I'm too distracted to continue studying because I am always unhappy and I feel like giving up. Life is really tough and I don't know what to do or how to get what I want. I really wish to be able to get the transition soon, or else I'll give up completely on myself.

    • February 15, 2014 11:29 PM GMT
    • Hi there, you have definitely done the right thing by reaching out. Your best friend will be knowledge as you learn more about who you are and where you should go.
      Although you may not think so, you have the big advantage of being young in more enlightened times. I know your family appear to be unsupportive, but time can change that. The important thing is to source the best available advice, whether it be from counsellors or the medical profession ( I do not know how the system works in Canada, but I am sure others will).
      You will find lots of support here and elsewhere. Take your time, even when you want to press ahead. That way you will get to where you truly should be. All the very best with your journey.

    • February 15, 2014 7:25 PM GMT
    • I am in BC.

    • February 15, 2014 7:23 PM GMT
    • Hi Calvin,
      What part of Canada are you in dear?

    • February 15, 2014 10:19 AM GMT
    • ...

    • September 11, 2013 2:57 PM BST
    • Hi Clara, 

       

      See below for a link on changing your name, it doesn't have to cost anything but choose whichever you feel will be best for you. 

       

      http://www.adviceguide.org.uk/england/family_parent/family/change_of_name.htm

       

      It sounds as though your voice training is coming along. Again, there isn't a need to get this right overnight and as you are living full time, it will naturally develop as you will be using it day to day. Don't be surprised if you get a sore throat or a croaky voice in the beginning tough, I know I did. (I also sounded male when I was ill too). My big milestone for the voice...........the phone. If you can talk on the phone and still be taken for female, you are there! The phone does horrible things to our voices and it took me years to get that right even though I could pass face to face easily. 

       

      For shaving, any good wet razor will suffice, and I used shave gel rather than foam as it was more effective and less irritating to my skin. I also only shaved against the grain to ensure a closer shave. It depends on how thick yours is. Being Strawberry blond, I'm guessing it isn't too bad?

       

      For your legs and body, I would recommend a Wilkinson Sword Ladyshave (has 4 blades) and Imperial Leather body wash, as it feels and smells fabulous, as well as getting the job done. 

       

      It's an exciting, and sometimes scary journey you are on, and you will find some great support on this site so please feel free to ask us anything, and hopefully it will help you to make that journey a little easier. 

       

      I don't know if I said this before but you have a wonderful mother for supporting you through this as it would be so much harder without her support. I have no doubt that your relationship will grow even stronger as a result. 

       

      Oh, by the way, nice profile photo! 

       

    • August 30, 2013 9:31 PM BST
    • Hey, just thought id post an update and ask a coule of questions about hair removal

      As you may have notice i now have a profile picture thats my Facebook photo, i set up a facebook page as clara and we're using facebook to tell the rest of the family

      Ive been to the docs on wednesday (as Clara) and have i am getting refered to a clinic

      Ive told my boss and shes cool, she has spread the word to the other staff they are offering to help with clothes ect. Even the blokey bloke who works at the garage nearby (He drops in and chats with boss) is really suportive, so far great responces from everyone.

      we're going shopping again tommorow and i should be going fultime as of the week after next.

       

      Any recomended shavers (normal not elec) or are they much the same?

      Im looking into buying a Rio home waxing kit are they worth it?

       

      Also i'm looking into changing my name by deedpoll, i have seen a lot of websites claim to provide this service for a small fee but i have heard that you can do this your self by just getting a form and sending it off (im asuming their would be some kind of service charge), but i cant find clear information on the process or which form i need, so i need some info on that aswell


      oh yea,..one of the benefits of working somewhere that sells second hand books is that i have access to a huge library of books, i got Conundrum by Jan Morris any recomendations for other books to look out for

    • August 22, 2013 7:13 PM BST
    • Especially nuns Wendy lol

    • August 22, 2013 5:17 PM BST
    • clara,

       

      Everyone has habits.  That is because the brain builds "superhighways" the way a rabbit track grows over centuries to become the M25 highway...by repeated and increasing use.  As you practice your new behavior patterns, they will grow until they replace the little used male habits.  It is all about time and practice until you build female patterns.

       

      Congratulations on having an awesome mum.

    • August 20, 2013 10:04 PM BST
    • Nikki Hollm said:

      Clara,

       

      PS There is nothing wrong in having a crush on one of the Gilmore girls, it's okay to be transgendered and lesbian too. Cool

       

      Thanks Nikki!!  , )

    • August 17, 2013 12:57 PM BST
    • "Carol Uren (Site Moderator) said:

      Your sexuality may change Clara when you have been on hormones for a while and you have started living full time - what it will change to I cannot say, you might prefer women more and seek a female partner or you might find that once you have dropped the pretence of being a man, then you might find that you want a male partner - or you might find both attractive sexually - or you might prefer neither.  All of them are natural and you will discover what appeals to you most.

      At the moment this side of your nature will be in flux and might only become apparent as you progress on your discovery of yourself."

       

      Thanks thats what i thought might happen, glad to see that this makes sense to other people aswell, i'll be interested to see what sexuality I am,

       

      Ill pop back on the live chat this evening, i wanted to go on last night but ended up helping spring cleaning/organising the house.

       

      PS i notice i keep saying thanks alot but you are all so helpful, its great to speak to people that understand my perspective, i imagine if you havn't been in our shoes its pretty damn impossible to get an understanding of it,

    • August 17, 2013 10:58 AM BST
    • Your sexuality may change Clara when you have been on hormones for a while and you have started living full time - what it will change to I cannot say, you might prefer women more and seek a female partner or you might find that once you have dropped the pretence of being a man, then you might find that you want a male partner - or you might find both attractive sexually - or you might prefer neither.  All of them are natural and you will discover what appeals to you most.

      At the moment this side of your nature will be in flux and might only become apparent as you progress on your discovery of yourself.

    • August 16, 2013 11:10 PM BST
    • Hi, thanks for the responces,

      that sucks about the laser, atleast i have a unique & striking hair colour, i goes il have to get good with a shaver.

      I thought an epilator too the face sounded stubid when i typed it, even the name "epilator" alones does not suggest happy, friendly images.

       

      My voice was bothering me because i couldn't get the hang of  what the turtuials were saying but i was singing along to avril lavigne (badly i might add) trying to push my pitch up a litte bit whilst keeping my voice's natoural qualitys, i then tried to bring up my volume and clarity and there it was my new voice i have no idea what it souned like externally but to me it sounded like it worked only problem is i had to warm my vocal cords up quite a bit to get there so im going to keep practicing at that untill i can use it readily, thanks ill check out those links seewhat tactics i can use to acommpany my avrill singing tactic.

       

      Thanks for the fun weekend offer, it sounds great but between money and timing i have to miss it, i will go to some of these things when  im set up femm and i am more financially stable, never had much of a social life but i'm finding i actually enjoy interacting with people now

       

      as for this crush thing i never di actually have a crussh on girls i don't think, looking back now i can see that the girls i thought had crushes on were just the girls i wanted to be like, and ive never liked guys in that sence

      leaving me kind of a-sexual i did wounder how many others felt like this but it felt kind of a personal subject and didnt like to ask.

       

       

      PS sorry for all the typeos and grammer errors, firefox spellchecker doesn't seem to work here for some reason, and it's to late now to go back and edit all my errors

    • August 16, 2013 8:13 PM BST
    • Right let's get down to answering some of your questions in a kinda organised way (I know, impossible for me) LOL

      1. Voice
      I found that the voice tutorials of Melanie Ann Phillips helped me tremendously (http://heartcorps.com/journeys/voice.htm) but I was fortunate in that it clicked with me fairly quickly.  You can hear what her voice sounds like now here (http://heartcorps.com/products/samples/voice-audio-sample.mp3).  For the oulay of $20 (around £13) it is awsome value for money.
      I converted the mp3 voice lessons to .cda format so I could burn them onto a CD and then practice in the car whilst I was driving.

      2.  Using an epilator on the face
       --------------------------------------------   DON'T    ------------------------------------------------
      lt not only make your face red raw, it can distort the follicles making it even more difficult for electrolysis.  Plucking, tweezing etc are the same - it does not reduce the strength of the hair or make them go away (ask any woman who has plucked her eyebrows all her life if it stops them growing).

      3.  Wanna get out and have some fun?
      Join our GS T-Girls in Torquay weekend and spend all weekend in your preferred gender role.  You will have a great weekend - and there are just one or two places left.  See this thread here in the forums for further information
      http://gendersociety.com/forums/topic/9317/torquay-t-girls-weekend-septemb

    • August 16, 2013 12:17 PM BST
    • Clara,

       

      Unfortunately laser isn't effective on blond or grey hair as there is not enough pigment in there so if you have a substantial amount of facial hair, then electrolysis is the way to go. It is a very slow process but it is permanant. Blonds often don't have the 5 o'clock shadow issues faced by those with dark hair so perhaps that is your case? If so, you are lucky.

       

      As Carol said, pop into the chat room which I believe starts filling up after 9:00pm UK time. Just talking to others will be of an immense help to you.

       

      Nikki

       

      PS There is nothing wrong in having a crush on one of the Gilmore girls, it's okay to be transgendered and lesbian too. Cool

    • August 15, 2013 9:23 PM BST
    • Pop in to the Chat Room Clara - people start drifting in about now

    • August 15, 2013 9:02 PM BST
    • Hey,

       

      Yea im quite certain this is what i want, i was 100% lingering at about 150% now, I don't know what the average wait to get on hormones in the uk is anyway but i was pictureing 1 or 2 years,

      im going to my gp next week would be this week but with work and stuff there just isnt time.

       

      Moms being very helpful with the makeup and stuff shes lent me a rather substantial book of basic make up that ive been reading at night. it looks a bit dated but the pricibles are the same

       

      ive watched various youtube vids about different bits of the transition mostly on Violet4151's channel, she gave me hope and seems to be a great source of info, she covers the most sensitive and awkward of things in a very clear and confortable fashion

       

      I always thought in life that the hard path is always worth the effort if the reward is great enough, and i feel in this case that notion is particulaly true

       

      I have tried following some youtube tuturials on you tube but my vocal abilitys suck and even with recordings i have trouble figuring out what people actually hear, even in my normal male voice the recordings sound miles off any natoural voice ive heard and cant be right so judging my new voice is hard.

       

      I work in a place with no customers with 3 women  so hopefully they should be ok with the true me, my busdrivers will get a suprise on my fist day that i come out but they are nice and seem to like me, the staff at game will probably be fairly shocked when i go and collect my preorded games next month that will be amusing to watch, ill probably retellmy story here. but i feel my reliance on gaming diminishing anyway

       

      this may be a dumb question but is it plausible to use an epilator on my face or will it make my face sore? pain i can deal with a red chin not so much, i have strawberry blond hair and ive read the lazers will not work on redhair but im not 100% on that because in argos some of them say they dont work on red hair and others dont mention it

       

      Thanks for the help have been trying to write this messasge for an hour but got distracted

    • August 15, 2013 8:13 PM BST
    • Hi Clara,

       

      First of all, be very sure that this is you want because once you start on hormones etc, there is no going back.

       

      In the meantime, you will find a lot of very useful information here in the forums regarding make up tips, passing in public, altering your voice etc but although you want all this by tomorrow, it just doesn't work that fast. It takes a while to firgure out what works for you in terms of make up for example. We are all different and what works for one may be unsuitable for another. Take it easy and enjoy it. If you have your mother's support, she will able to help you as well. Transitioning is a slow process to get it right, it doesn't happen overnight. It takes months, even a year or two. There is a lot to learn in becoming a woman, it isn't just about putting on a dress and some make up. There are a lot of changes that you will have to undertake.

       

      Then there is transitioning in the workplace. For many, a scary prospect. Transitioning is very public. You can't go from 'Dave' to 'Jill' witout people noticing. Tongue out

       

      Don't feel I am trying to put you off, I'm not. But it isn't always easy. That said, you have youth on your side and so the sooner you can transition the better. However, do it properly and, as far as hormones are concerned, under medical supervision.

       

      To that end, have you told your GP yet? If not, and you are sure this is what you want, then do so as soon as possible in order to start the ball rolling in getting the necessary referral you will require in order to begin your transition. 

       

      Anyway, you asked about shaving and your voice. You can work on your voice straight away and youtube has some good videos from women who have acheived excellent results. Don't be dissapointed if you can't match them, even GG women have all types of different voices. You just need a voice that you can use in public and not be read.

       

      Shaving - a wet razor is best and shaving against the grain will achieve better results as it is a closer shave. ultimately though, you will very likely need to consider laser hair removal and electrolysis, neither is cheap but they effective and for most women, very necessary. It isn't just your face remember, it's your chest, back, legs etc etc. You can buy an epilator for home use which will remove hair quite effectively but it can be very painful and they will grow back.

       

      The road to transition is long and can be rough in places but ultimately, it's a great journey.

       

      Nikki

    • August 15, 2013 7:56 PM BST
    • The crowd here waxes and wanes with various rhythms which I have yet to figure - probably because it is an international mix and each has only certain times and places they can connect due to various barriers in each person's life. There are days it can be quite abuzz with activity however. Also there are chat room situations and look to make friends here - they can be a great help - particularly the various admin types and forum people and such. They have helped me a great deal.
      I hid myself and ran from myself for most of my life and I am late in my 40s, so I can understand the desperation. I feel at times everyone here is 100 fold better looking and further along than me and has it altogether. But, the first thing I note is I finally came out to myself, acknowledged and accepted myself, and found a path that will take a great deal of time, due to circumstances in my life beyond my control - but having control over my inner being, my true self - despite the hassles - has been the most liberating of feelings for me. 
      As to boots - I have a photo of me in one of my folders with a really cool pair I wore out a couple of times shopping - leather with a short heel and laced up - they are radically sweet : )
      Happy adventures...
      hugs, Briana : )

    • August 15, 2013 7:40 PM BST
    • Thanks, my mom was there for the early years (of Annabelle as i was back then) before puberty came along and made me forget myself so whilst the sudden revisit was a suprise she did have an incling that I was still

      i think my supposed crush on Rory gilmore (aka gilmore girils) that turned out to be misread admiration and jealousy was the biggest hint.

       

      I think after 10 years of denial im just desperate to be her not the him i made up, but yea il just l her devellop natourally.

      Its hasn't been long so i guess its gonna take a while for my brain to work out i can be her 24/7, just me being impationt with myself as always.

       

      i guess the voice bothers me most obviously im going to not sound passibly female for some time but i dont want to dress up nice an then end up speaking in my male voice.

      maybe can persuade some one to give me a starter lession over xbox live chat

       

      thanks going shoping for clothes i actually want will be a strange new experience, im looking foward to picking up some cute boots.

       

      P.S. is it just me or is it quiet on here?

    • August 15, 2013 7:10 PM BST
    • Hello Clara - Super to hear you are open and have apparently good communication with you mom - that is a great start. The first critical piece of advice is this - patience. There is no due date or deadline you are trying to meet - take time. Also another good idea is keep the focus on your inner self and let her develop in time - public or not, you are always you. As to the 'wine', this is a great site to come to when there is a need to rant and even better to ask questions - there are many who can help here and offer solid, useful advice. There are some here who may have advice on workind on the voice and the shaver - I see these as a work in progress with myself at present as well. Have a great shopping trip and find yourself - I love going out and doing just that from time to time. Take Care. hugs, Briana : )

    • August 15, 2013 6:51 PM BST
    • I played with girls toys mostly when I was little, wanted to play with the girls but got rejected for being a boy. When i was 7 i said i wanted to be a girl and i was for holidays ect but puberty and pier preasure pushed me off that path and made me lose my self for a chunk of my life i eventually became so miserabal i was forced to reavaluate things and work out what was missing and thus im here.

       

      i would say it sounds like you could be, but i would say in your case puberty has probably highlighted how wrong being male is for you. You should speak to more people and be sure before you take the plunge, belive me i know its dificult when your a teen to be sure about yourself but the answer is there inside you, you just have to keep looking and at some point you will see your true self clear as day

       

      P.S. meant to say Good Luck on your journey

      I should also say that i'm still new to this so my advice might not be as sound as others but i belive what i say to be true