Some advice.

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  • I have posted this in Transgender Youth for a reason but it applies to all ages in some cases. There is one thing that is more important than anything else for you to have decent future and that is honesty.

    So you are trans whatever?. You need to find out firstly if what ever it is you have or who you are whether it is going to affect the rest of your life. Self diagnosis is not the best route to take so get yourself diagnosed. You thinking it is a phase or it will go away is not the right thing to be thinking.

    If your gender identity is affecting your life you need a professional to diagnose you. I am telling you this because it will not only affect your future but also the future of others. Your family and friends need to be considered too , and others that surround you.

     

    We all know what love feels like and we all know , or you should , that love is a wonderful thing , it can also hurt. Before you enter a relationship remember love can bring you closer or tear you apart. Once you have entered that relationship honesty is what will hold you together. Any relationship based lies and deception will fail.

     

    You get one life as far as I am aware so it is in my opinion best to live it as best you can and honestly. Being diagnosed as being transexual is not the end of the world , look upon it as a start. I am not saying it will be easy but being honest with yourself and others will make it that little bit more easy , you are not alone and being you is nothing to be ashamed of , it is the most natural thing in the world. Pretending you are someone you are not is not natural and is unhealthy.

     

    So consider your options first. Do you really want to fall in love and then take a big chance of losing that?. It is not an ideal way to start life as an adult (to the youth). Find out who you are and become that person and do not go thinking you will never find love. I get offers from men half my age in my day to day life but I am not looking so I dismiss them. I may play with them on the internet but then they bore me so I discard them like broken toys , after all they only want one thing (best not go there).

     

    This is about you , it is about your future. Unless you want to go through and put others through what is in the link below just stop and think about what you are doing.

    http://gendersociety.com/forums/topic/10112/divorcing-and-the-unreasonable-transexual

    You all take care and enjoy life , it is better than destroying lives.

     

    Julia xx

     

      February 21, 2016 8:47 PM GMT
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  • Julia - your life, and mine - are invaluable.  I say this because when you seemed to leave, I worried about you.  I was not alone.

     

    You know you can be very opinionated, aggressive and, sadly self-deprecating.  So fine.  You have  noticed a long tome ago that the home page on here, sadly, is about boosting mutual self esteem..  If you have a birth mark, let's say, or if you are an old tart with spider veins, then you arenot going to cut the mustard.  However, in my view, there are several of us here who may think outside THAT envelope, so let us celebrate them - as you did with Cristine Shye.

    She - LIKE YOU - is invaluable.  A Jewel beyond price.  I do not imagine for a moment that she - and others like her - wonder what I am wearing.  What do my false tits look like - YEUGH!

     

    No.  She, Hannah and brianna just plug on - and because of the fact that I have too much Andalucian Red, have forgotten so many others.  My regrets.

    I know who you are - and I am sure that you do do too.

    I know that I can ALWAYS come back to the folks here.  Thanks!

     

      February 22, 2016 8:32 PM GMT
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  • Hi Amanda.

     

    Call me names but please never ever call me aggressive , I do not have an aggressive bone in my body. Make yourself a bowl of warm custard and put your hand in it , and think of me , that is how soft I am.

    At times I sound harsh , I admit that but I call it being cruel to be kind. If someone cannot figure that out by not taking the time to get to know me it really is not my fault. I can also figure out who comes here to take the piss , and yes I will let them know but if the truth hurts again that really is not my fault.

     

    I cannot and never will compare myself to Crissie but we relate to each other , we both had childhoods from hell but we survived and we both try our best to help others. Over the years Crissie has taken the time to get to know me. On a few occassions we even have a difference of opinions but that does not spoil our friendship.

     

    You Amanda? I do not care what you are wearing I care about you "The person - The human". I care about all humans that enter my life and make a mark on me , a good mark. The ones that enter my life with the sole intention to insult me and abuse me and use me as an internet punch bag can go f*ck themselves as far as I am concerned , they are beyond help.

     

    This topic?. I see far to many young people come here and never return. I have witnessed some being forced off here by older members. This website and it's members needs youth here , they are the future. I have made over 4,000 posts on this website over the years and most of them have been about caring , yes I have had some differences of opinions that have turned sour but people have to understand they are "My opinions". Also I am human so I make mistakes sometimes and if I do I admit it and apologise for them.

    Here are just two random topics of mine.

    http://gendersociety.com/forums/topic/9865/under-age-members

     

    http://gendersociety.com/forums/topic/9856/a-gs-member-emergency-fund

     

    This website is littered with them and they involve care. You see the problem is the ones that choose to use me as an internet punch bag ignore caring. People like that only care about one thing and that is themselves. I am nothing special but I spend most of my life caring about others and helping others , if that is a crime in others eyes then I gladly plead guilty.

     

    Can everyone here please make young members welcome?. Make them feel at home here. Help them and encourage them to not be afraid to ask questions. Everyone please remember we were all young once and how hard that was. Making a diffence to someones life is so rewarding.

     

    Have a listen to the words in this. Music inspires me and this is an inspiration. Two lines that ring true. If I fail if I succeed at least I live as I believe. No matter what they take away from me they can't take away my dignity https://youtu.be/IYzlVDlE72w

     

    You all take care , Julia xx

     

    Spell errors corrected.

    This post was edited by Former Member at March 13, 2016 2:00 PM GMT
      February 22, 2016 11:46 PM GMT
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  • Julia, dear Julia,

    I would only ask that you do not go through (for our sake as well as yours) and do NOT even think of leaving us again. 

     

    Big hug, Amanda

     

      February 24, 2016 3:45 PM GMT
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  • Thank you Amanda.

     

    Back on topic. If you go the the main forum page for Transgender Youth and look 2 topics below this you will see a post by a former member. Her name was Ana and she was driven off this website by an older member. Her membership here lasted just over a week. She was a lovely girl and could have brought something to this website , she was not the only one that was driven away by older members.

     

    I can spot vulnerable people here or people with genuine problems. They are the ones that concern me.

     

    Take care , hugs , Julia xx

    This post was edited by Former Member at March 13, 2016 2:04 PM GMT
      February 24, 2016 5:30 PM GMT
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