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I had a bit of an emotional roller coaster of a weekend.
My therapist appointment went great, as usual. I am going to stop using the men's room to change as I was almost caught on Friday. My shrink is letting me use one of the other offices to change in from now on.
Then I went all the way to the far south side to my school, foolishly thinking I would have a paycheck. No go. They're telling me now it could take 6 full weeks to get me into the system. 6 weeks? Why so long? What made it worse was that my daughter was going to stay with me and I would have no money to treat her to anything. I felt so worthless. I had to get money from me mum.
I picked her up Friday evening and we wound up going to McDonald's (see my latest forum posting about staying away from kiddie playlands!). The next day I treated her to brekkie, and then we did a lot of running around. We had a lot of fun playing with puppies in a pet store. She bled me dry! I bought her so much stuff!
But at one point, in a toy store, she had her face in her hands and was crying. She thought that if I bought her something there we wouldn't have money for the movie. With only $60 to my name, I still bought her a $20 doll set. Then, in the car, I could tell she still wasn't right. In a teary confession she told me how much she misses me. I damn near lost it right in front of her. To make matters more interesting, we went and saw "Eight Below," which has plenty of tearjerking moments. It was so difficult to take her back home. My wife was polite to me, but later mentioned she doesn't want me to hug her in any way when I leave.
Yesterday a whole bunch of family members came over, especially to hook up a new computer for my folks. As usual, my brother ignored me.
So here it is, Monday morning, overcast, drizzly, and I'm tired as hell. I need to get my head together for class.
