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Lucy Diamond 's Entries

204 blogs
  • 06 Dec 2006
    One ring to rule them all…Or one keyboard perhaps? My new keyboard arrived a day late, as I was slightly expecting. What I didn’t expect was for it to arrive slightly faulty. After paying so much this was a bit disappointing. Things went from bad to worse after sending it back, the replacement not arriving when it was promised, not even the day after. No-one had called me to say there was a problem so I rang Korg:"Oh we’ve realised we don’t have any more Triton 88 notes in stock.""But mine is a 76 note.""Oh, um, ahh, we’ve got some of those…"Anyway 2 weeks after parting with my money I eventually got a replacement, which so far seems to be behaving itself. The plan was to spend the month we had with no gigs, programming the sounds for the set. I thought that was going to be a bit tight but as it turned out I only had 2 weeks. After working 12 hour days for most of the last 2 weeks I have just about got everything sorted, though there will be a serious amount of tweaking and fine tuning when I’ve actually used it with the band. The main thing is that I think it is going to do the job of replacing my mish-mash of keyboards, modules, samplers and bits and pieces, all in one box (its box was quite expensive too!) so that means less to carry and a lot less to set up. This will be such a relief and of course will give me more time to touch up my make up and tidy my hair and things before we go on, which has usually been a bit of panic so far.We rehearse tomorrow night, its first outing, I’m so looking forward to using it with the band. It’s first gig will be on Saturday, ooohh…Anyway, enough of all that technical stuff. Whilst I was in between keyboards I had my third appointment at Charing Cross, this time for a second opinion on a tracheal shave, amongst other things. This was my first appointment with a male psychiatrist, so I couldn’t help but wonder if this would be where Charing Cross lived up to their seemingly dreadful reputation. It wasn’t.Dr Lorimer was just the nicest guy, friendly, chatty and amazingly helpful. He left me with the feeling that he really wanted to help, and really wanted to get things moving for me. Not only did I get the second opinion on the trach shave, but he gave the first opinion on SRS. I asked if there would be any problem or bad feeling if I had my SRS privately with a surgeon of my choice. Not at all. It was indeed, my choice. We talked at length about my hormone regime, my GP has still not received specific instructions on exactly what to prescribe. Dr Lorimer assured me that he would write to him with those instructions, based on what we had discussed, and subject to the results of my blood test, which was only my second in two years of hormone use, one year since my first appointment at Charing Cross.I even got in there 20 minutes early, which was good because my appointment ran over by 20 minutes, mainly due to me nattering on, but then he was being chatty too, asking about the band and stuff. He was also most interested when I told him my first night out dressed was in Edinburgh, that being his home town. Anyway I left with a good feeling, let’s just hope the test results come through soon and I can see my GP about improving my regime.I’d heard very little that was good about Charing Cross before I went there. Only such things as they are egotistical control freaks and will try to talk you out of it or just plain abuse you. I can’t say whether or not that was true in the past, but it’s certainly not now. Obviously things will be quicker if you go privately, but unless you’re in a great rush for SRS I can’t see much advantage in that. Hormones take time to work and the Gender Recognition Panel still require a minimum two years of living full time. My next appointment may even be a consultation with the ENT surgeon. I’m still keeping my options open on that, but I think I might as well see what he says about his procedure and my rather large protuberance before deciding to go elsewhere.And Christmas is around the corner. All I have in my head is a zillion different sounds and combinations and configurations. I really must do some shopping soon. Oh bloody hell…xx
    624 Posted by Lucy Diamond
  • One ring to rule them all…Or one keyboard perhaps? My new keyboard arrived a day late, as I was slightly expecting. What I didn’t expect was for it to arrive slightly faulty. After paying so much this was a bit disappointing. Things went from bad to worse after sending it back, the replacement not arriving when it was promised, not even the day after. No-one had called me to say there was a problem so I rang Korg:"Oh we’ve realised we don’t have any more Triton 88 notes in stock.""But mine is a 76 note.""Oh, um, ahh, we’ve got some of those…"Anyway 2 weeks after parting with my money I eventually got a replacement, which so far seems to be behaving itself. The plan was to spend the month we had with no gigs, programming the sounds for the set. I thought that was going to be a bit tight but as it turned out I only had 2 weeks. After working 12 hour days for most of the last 2 weeks I have just about got everything sorted, though there will be a serious amount of tweaking and fine tuning when I’ve actually used it with the band. The main thing is that I think it is going to do the job of replacing my mish-mash of keyboards, modules, samplers and bits and pieces, all in one box (its box was quite expensive too!) so that means less to carry and a lot less to set up. This will be such a relief and of course will give me more time to touch up my make up and tidy my hair and things before we go on, which has usually been a bit of panic so far.We rehearse tomorrow night, its first outing, I’m so looking forward to using it with the band. It’s first gig will be on Saturday, ooohh…Anyway, enough of all that technical stuff. Whilst I was in between keyboards I had my third appointment at Charing Cross, this time for a second opinion on a tracheal shave, amongst other things. This was my first appointment with a male psychiatrist, so I couldn’t help but wonder if this would be where Charing Cross lived up to their seemingly dreadful reputation. It wasn’t.Dr Lorimer was just the nicest guy, friendly, chatty and amazingly helpful. He left me with the feeling that he really wanted to help, and really wanted to get things moving for me. Not only did I get the second opinion on the trach shave, but he gave the first opinion on SRS. I asked if there would be any problem or bad feeling if I had my SRS privately with a surgeon of my choice. Not at all. It was indeed, my choice. We talked at length about my hormone regime, my GP has still not received specific instructions on exactly what to prescribe. Dr Lorimer assured me that he would write to him with those instructions, based on what we had discussed, and subject to the results of my blood test, which was only my second in two years of hormone use, one year since my first appointment at Charing Cross.I even got in there 20 minutes early, which was good because my appointment ran over by 20 minutes, mainly due to me nattering on, but then he was being chatty too, asking about the band and stuff. He was also most interested when I told him my first night out dressed was in Edinburgh, that being his home town. Anyway I left with a good feeling, let’s just hope the test results come through soon and I can see my GP about improving my regime.I’d heard very little that was good about Charing Cross before I went there. Only such things as they are egotistical control freaks and will try to talk you out of it or just plain abuse you. I can’t say whether or not that was true in the past, but it’s certainly not now. Obviously things will be quicker if you go privately, but unless you’re in a great rush for SRS I can’t see much advantage in that. Hormones take time to work and the Gender Recognition Panel still require a minimum two years of living full time. My next appointment may even be a consultation with the ENT surgeon. I’m still keeping my options open on that, but I think I might as well see what he says about his procedure and my rather large protuberance before deciding to go elsewhere.And Christmas is around the corner. All I have in my head is a zillion different sounds and combinations and configurations. I really must do some shopping soon. Oh bloody hell…xx
    Dec 06, 2006 624
  • 20 Nov 2006
    SunbeamWhatever I have to blog about today is put on hold, as it all seems irrelevant after the sad loss of Rebecca. I’d read her blogs, replied to her posts in the forums, and spoke very briefly in the chat room. Like many others here, she made a big impact on me even after such brief contact.19 years old, sweet, witty, intelligent, determined and secure of who she was and what she must do, and of course, very pretty, I so looked forward to getting to know her better. She was a beaming ray of sunshine, and shone brightly here on Trannyweb. It is so cruel that one who has so much to live for should be taken away. I know all who had come into contact with her will miss her presence here, and my heart goes out to her family and friends.Bless you, Rebecca.xx
    591 Posted by Lucy Diamond
  • SunbeamWhatever I have to blog about today is put on hold, as it all seems irrelevant after the sad loss of Rebecca. I’d read her blogs, replied to her posts in the forums, and spoke very briefly in the chat room. Like many others here, she made a big impact on me even after such brief contact.19 years old, sweet, witty, intelligent, determined and secure of who she was and what she must do, and of course, very pretty, I so looked forward to getting to know her better. She was a beaming ray of sunshine, and shone brightly here on Trannyweb. It is so cruel that one who has so much to live for should be taken away. I know all who had come into contact with her will miss her presence here, and my heart goes out to her family and friends.Bless you, Rebecca.xx
    Nov 20, 2006 591
  • 10 Nov 2006
    Waiting for GodotI’ve just bought a new keyboard and am sitting here waiting, hoping that it will be delivered today. They said it would, but what they say and what happens aren’t always the same. I’m on tenterhooks, as it’s a major purchase, one of the most expensive pieces of equipment I’ve ever bought. Oh god…My main keyboard that I use live had been playing up slightly. It still worked but had a sticky button which was causing the display screen to flash madly and sometimes interfered with my being able to change sounds. It also had something rattling about inside it. I’ve often had to open up keyboards to fix such niggley little problems, but never this one, my most recent and loveliest addition to my sound-making arsenal. So I thought I’d have a go, how hard can it be…?I put it upside-down on a chair and got all the screws out except one on the side which was stuck fast. So I turned it over to get a better grip, not realising that I had detached the actual keyboard from the casing (on all my other keyboards those screws are inside). The rather heavy block of keys swiftly fell out and landed on my foot, bits of plastic flying everywhere. One key had got a bit smashed (I know that feeling) and jumped out altogether, another was sticking up and looking quite poorly. It’s a terrible feeling to see your main keyboard in pieces on the floor. For virtually everything else I use onstage I have a spare, but not this. Gulp.I really shouldn’t attempt this sort of thing at 2 in the morning. Anyway I found some old Araldite and managed to glue some of the broken bits back onto the keys, and went to bed leaving it to set fast overnight. Couldn’t sleep, worried about having to cancel the next gig the day after tomorrow, and my head spinning trying to work out how or if I could manage without the keyboard if I couldn’t get the broken keys to work again, or if indeed it would make any sound at all.I don’t think I could have done the gig, this being my "mother" keyboard which controls everything else. Fortunately I managed to get the keys back in with the help of some cardboard and strong tape. It was only in the morning I realised how badly I’d hurt my foot; the shock of seeing the keys come apart stopped me from feeling any pain when they hit me. But today, it was bloody sore and badly bruised.I’ve since received brand new keys from the spares department and managed to get the stuck screw out so I could access the circuit board and squirt some switch cleaner on the sticky button. It all seems to be as good as new again, but it gave me quite a fright.I’d been thinking about a new keyboard anyway and this made me realise that I really did need some sort of contingency plan. In theory, the new one will replace not only the mother keyboard, but also the second keyboard, 2 sound modules, a sampler and Zip drive, and a piano module. I can also manage without a mixing desk for this gaggle of gear, as I’ll only have one thing to plug in! That’ll be a hell of a lot less to carry! Let’s hope the theory can be put into practice, I won’t really know until I start programming sounds for the band, which is going to take me ages…This is probably the least interesting blog I have ever written, but I had to do something, as I’m just sitting here waiting, waiting…Oh well. I’m off to London for my 3rd Charing Cross appointment a week today, but I have more exciting things on my mind at the moment. (It IS exciting, honest). CX feels like no big deal now anyway, I know the drill, but it has to be done. I do hope they give me something more positive to go on this time, especially regarding the trach shave, but they’ve been ok so far I guess, and I have no major complaints.What time is it now…? Groan. It’s like waiting for Godot, but he’s probably not going to come today…xx
    664 Posted by Lucy Diamond
  • Waiting for GodotI’ve just bought a new keyboard and am sitting here waiting, hoping that it will be delivered today. They said it would, but what they say and what happens aren’t always the same. I’m on tenterhooks, as it’s a major purchase, one of the most expensive pieces of equipment I’ve ever bought. Oh god…My main keyboard that I use live had been playing up slightly. It still worked but had a sticky button which was causing the display screen to flash madly and sometimes interfered with my being able to change sounds. It also had something rattling about inside it. I’ve often had to open up keyboards to fix such niggley little problems, but never this one, my most recent and loveliest addition to my sound-making arsenal. So I thought I’d have a go, how hard can it be…?I put it upside-down on a chair and got all the screws out except one on the side which was stuck fast. So I turned it over to get a better grip, not realising that I had detached the actual keyboard from the casing (on all my other keyboards those screws are inside). The rather heavy block of keys swiftly fell out and landed on my foot, bits of plastic flying everywhere. One key had got a bit smashed (I know that feeling) and jumped out altogether, another was sticking up and looking quite poorly. It’s a terrible feeling to see your main keyboard in pieces on the floor. For virtually everything else I use onstage I have a spare, but not this. Gulp.I really shouldn’t attempt this sort of thing at 2 in the morning. Anyway I found some old Araldite and managed to glue some of the broken bits back onto the keys, and went to bed leaving it to set fast overnight. Couldn’t sleep, worried about having to cancel the next gig the day after tomorrow, and my head spinning trying to work out how or if I could manage without the keyboard if I couldn’t get the broken keys to work again, or if indeed it would make any sound at all.I don’t think I could have done the gig, this being my "mother" keyboard which controls everything else. Fortunately I managed to get the keys back in with the help of some cardboard and strong tape. It was only in the morning I realised how badly I’d hurt my foot; the shock of seeing the keys come apart stopped me from feeling any pain when they hit me. But today, it was bloody sore and badly bruised.I’ve since received brand new keys from the spares department and managed to get the stuck screw out so I could access the circuit board and squirt some switch cleaner on the sticky button. It all seems to be as good as new again, but it gave me quite a fright.I’d been thinking about a new keyboard anyway and this made me realise that I really did need some sort of contingency plan. In theory, the new one will replace not only the mother keyboard, but also the second keyboard, 2 sound modules, a sampler and Zip drive, and a piano module. I can also manage without a mixing desk for this gaggle of gear, as I’ll only have one thing to plug in! That’ll be a hell of a lot less to carry! Let’s hope the theory can be put into practice, I won’t really know until I start programming sounds for the band, which is going to take me ages…This is probably the least interesting blog I have ever written, but I had to do something, as I’m just sitting here waiting, waiting…Oh well. I’m off to London for my 3rd Charing Cross appointment a week today, but I have more exciting things on my mind at the moment. (It IS exciting, honest). CX feels like no big deal now anyway, I know the drill, but it has to be done. I do hope they give me something more positive to go on this time, especially regarding the trach shave, but they’ve been ok so far I guess, and I have no major complaints.What time is it now…? Groan. It’s like waiting for Godot, but he’s probably not going to come today…xx
    Nov 10, 2006 664
  • 19 Oct 2006
    Comfortably numb, or not…Gillian’s operation has gone without problems, so far at least. I had an email from her last night. She’s back on her feet and planning on having a brief look around the shops in a day or two. Subject to an internal examination by Dr Suporn today she will be, um, ‘upgrading’ to the large "Thai boyfriend". For those of you who don’t know, Dr S patients (affectionately known as "Supornistas") have to dilate 4 hours a day for the first 6 months, no fun at all from what I gather, especially in the early days. She says it’s pretty painful already so really isn’t looking forward to using the biggest stent. No pain, no gain, as they say. I asked her about the trach shave, she says she can’t see the old Adam’s apple, but the fresh scar is kind of putting her off looking too closely. Hopefully that will become virtually invisible after time. I just wish I was there going through it all myself, but it shouldn’t be too long now…This Saturday our band return to the place where we did our first gig, Mariner’s in Bowness, so I’m kind of looking forward to that, as this time we’ll be able to do the gig without the first night nerves! I so enjoy playing in this band, we’re constantly learning new songs, which keeps us on our toes and stops us going stale like many cover bands around here, some of who have been playing more or less the same set for years, lazy sods. We’ve been sent another video clip by one of our fans from the open air gig in Lancaster in August. It’s now available for all the world to see on YouTube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0mvJ3XLAbEs Once again this was just taken on a mobile phonecam thingy, so no complaints about the sound and picture quality please, though it’s surprisingly not bad for such a device. And you can see more of the band this time, even me, a bit. This is the only gig I’ve ever done with my hair tied up, simply cos it was a bit breezy and I didn’t want my hair getting stuck to my lipstick, but thankfully the camera is far away enough not be able to see my ugly face in close detail. Hope you enjoy the clip anyway, apologies to Pink Floyd and all their fans! (Hey Mum, did you spot yourself in the audience?!)The singer’s dad took some video of this gig on a proper videocam, but I still haven’t seen that yet. We are planning a beer and video night soon where we can all get together and pick holes in our performance, which should be fun.Anyway I have nothing in particular to do today except blogging and housework, so I guess now there are no excuses left. Groan.Where’s my duster…?xx
    734 Posted by Lucy Diamond
  • Comfortably numb, or not…Gillian’s operation has gone without problems, so far at least. I had an email from her last night. She’s back on her feet and planning on having a brief look around the shops in a day or two. Subject to an internal examination by Dr Suporn today she will be, um, ‘upgrading’ to the large "Thai boyfriend". For those of you who don’t know, Dr S patients (affectionately known as "Supornistas") have to dilate 4 hours a day for the first 6 months, no fun at all from what I gather, especially in the early days. She says it’s pretty painful already so really isn’t looking forward to using the biggest stent. No pain, no gain, as they say. I asked her about the trach shave, she says she can’t see the old Adam’s apple, but the fresh scar is kind of putting her off looking too closely. Hopefully that will become virtually invisible after time. I just wish I was there going through it all myself, but it shouldn’t be too long now…This Saturday our band return to the place where we did our first gig, Mariner’s in Bowness, so I’m kind of looking forward to that, as this time we’ll be able to do the gig without the first night nerves! I so enjoy playing in this band, we’re constantly learning new songs, which keeps us on our toes and stops us going stale like many cover bands around here, some of who have been playing more or less the same set for years, lazy sods. We’ve been sent another video clip by one of our fans from the open air gig in Lancaster in August. It’s now available for all the world to see on YouTube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0mvJ3XLAbEs Once again this was just taken on a mobile phonecam thingy, so no complaints about the sound and picture quality please, though it’s surprisingly not bad for such a device. And you can see more of the band this time, even me, a bit. This is the only gig I’ve ever done with my hair tied up, simply cos it was a bit breezy and I didn’t want my hair getting stuck to my lipstick, but thankfully the camera is far away enough not be able to see my ugly face in close detail. Hope you enjoy the clip anyway, apologies to Pink Floyd and all their fans! (Hey Mum, did you spot yourself in the audience?!)The singer’s dad took some video of this gig on a proper videocam, but I still haven’t seen that yet. We are planning a beer and video night soon where we can all get together and pick holes in our performance, which should be fun.Anyway I have nothing in particular to do today except blogging and housework, so I guess now there are no excuses left. Groan.Where’s my duster…?xx
    Oct 19, 2006 734
  • 04 Oct 2006
    Sugar and SpiceAt 7:30 this morning, Thai time, my friend Gillian will have begun her SRS with the good Dr Suporn. I’m so excited for her, and ever so slightly wishing it was me there. Ironically me, Stephie and Laura (some of the local TS gang) and Natalie from Arran went out for a Thai meal last night. Gillian doesn’t like spicy food so she’ll be living off KFC for a month! Gillian rang us around midnight while we were in the pub, half an hour before her op was due to start, she’s very laid back you know. Anyway we all wished her well and I asked her to keep the bed warm for me. She won’t ever read this, but I just wanted to state on record, that I am officially thinking about her. All the best babe, hope it’s gone well and I look forward to hearing all the gory details.We all went out last week as well, with Gillian, to wish her well on her way. Or maybe it was just an excuse for a nice meal out and a few drinkies. Like most TS’s I just want to live a normal life and blend in amongst society, but it’s kind of fun going out with a gang, and really making our presence felt in this small town. Makes people aware that we are not isolated individuals hiding away, and that transgenderism is everywhere, even in Kendal.Saw my GP the other week for a repeat prescription, and managed to persuade him to add Oestrogel to my regime, which I’ve been using anyway, but now it will be £6.50 a tube instead of like 20 quid. While I was there I asked him to print me out the letters from Charing Cross; every time I visit them they write back to my GP just to say what was said and what they had ascertained and what he should be doing about it. Despite some minor inaccuracies, which I hope are irrelevant, it was all very reassuring:"My impression is that Lucy does indeed suffer from a primary male to female gender identity disorder…"Well thank goodness for that!"She passed very well in a female role…"That was nice, debatable though.And from the second psychologist I saw:"She presented as an unremarkable female with foundation, lipstick and blusher…"And half a pot of Dermablend, as always. Unremarkable is good, I think, don’t want to stand out from the crowd."Ms Jones’s presentation was consistent with Gender Identity Disorder. There was no psychopathology"That’s two opinions in agreement with each other, and I’m not mad, woo-hoo!"Two opinions" seems to be the magic word at Charing Cross, it’s now just wait, and see people from time to time to make sure I haven’t changed my mind (well duhh). My next appointment should see a second opinion on my need for a tracheal shave. If they will do it, and can do it well I hope I can get that sorted soon, because I’d really like to get that out of the way before SRS if possible. Gillian is having a trach shave at the same time as SRS, hers is (um, was) a lot smaller than mine, but if that goes well and Dr Suporn thinks he can reduce mine sufficiently then that is another option.Anyway I must go and pick up my car, which I left in town last night, driving was obviously not an option. It means a 3 mile walk but it’ll blow some cobwebs away!Bye for now girls.xx
    557 Posted by Lucy Diamond
  • Sugar and SpiceAt 7:30 this morning, Thai time, my friend Gillian will have begun her SRS with the good Dr Suporn. I’m so excited for her, and ever so slightly wishing it was me there. Ironically me, Stephie and Laura (some of the local TS gang) and Natalie from Arran went out for a Thai meal last night. Gillian doesn’t like spicy food so she’ll be living off KFC for a month! Gillian rang us around midnight while we were in the pub, half an hour before her op was due to start, she’s very laid back you know. Anyway we all wished her well and I asked her to keep the bed warm for me. She won’t ever read this, but I just wanted to state on record, that I am officially thinking about her. All the best babe, hope it’s gone well and I look forward to hearing all the gory details.We all went out last week as well, with Gillian, to wish her well on her way. Or maybe it was just an excuse for a nice meal out and a few drinkies. Like most TS’s I just want to live a normal life and blend in amongst society, but it’s kind of fun going out with a gang, and really making our presence felt in this small town. Makes people aware that we are not isolated individuals hiding away, and that transgenderism is everywhere, even in Kendal.Saw my GP the other week for a repeat prescription, and managed to persuade him to add Oestrogel to my regime, which I’ve been using anyway, but now it will be £6.50 a tube instead of like 20 quid. While I was there I asked him to print me out the letters from Charing Cross; every time I visit them they write back to my GP just to say what was said and what they had ascertained and what he should be doing about it. Despite some minor inaccuracies, which I hope are irrelevant, it was all very reassuring:"My impression is that Lucy does indeed suffer from a primary male to female gender identity disorder…"Well thank goodness for that!"She passed very well in a female role…"That was nice, debatable though.And from the second psychologist I saw:"She presented as an unremarkable female with foundation, lipstick and blusher…"And half a pot of Dermablend, as always. Unremarkable is good, I think, don’t want to stand out from the crowd."Ms Jones’s presentation was consistent with Gender Identity Disorder. There was no psychopathology"That’s two opinions in agreement with each other, and I’m not mad, woo-hoo!"Two opinions" seems to be the magic word at Charing Cross, it’s now just wait, and see people from time to time to make sure I haven’t changed my mind (well duhh). My next appointment should see a second opinion on my need for a tracheal shave. If they will do it, and can do it well I hope I can get that sorted soon, because I’d really like to get that out of the way before SRS if possible. Gillian is having a trach shave at the same time as SRS, hers is (um, was) a lot smaller than mine, but if that goes well and Dr Suporn thinks he can reduce mine sufficiently then that is another option.Anyway I must go and pick up my car, which I left in town last night, driving was obviously not an option. It means a 3 mile walk but it’ll blow some cobwebs away!Bye for now girls.xx
    Oct 04, 2006 557
  • 15 Sep 2006
    British CitizenA mere two weeks after sending off my application, I have just received my new biometric passport, correct name, correct gender, and a picture that looks like me again. I looked at the new and the old passports together to compare, what a weird feeling, was that really me, a previous life perhaps, a former existence? Just seeing my old name written down seems weird now, let alone official documentation complete with mug-shot. They say no-one likes their passport photo, and I was always a good example of that, but now, for the first time ever, I do; I’m proud of it. I am proud to have a real identity at last, one that I can actually relate to, one that seems to fit.I had a letter from Charing Cross to explain that I was transsexual, apparently happy living in this role, and requesting that a passport be issued in the appropriate gender, I’m not sure if this letter is absolutely necessary, but this along with my change of name deed meant there were no questions asked. I am now officially female wherever in the world I go. Just hope I don’t get strip-searched before I have my SRS.Now I have a passport, I want to use it! Where could I go, hmmm…? Maybe I should save my money, or maybe I will go away for a few days, just because I can. Haven’t been abroad for years, might be nice to get away for a change of scene. But then hopefully Thailand won’t be so far away, time-wise that is!It’s kind of nice to be "official", some sort of validation I guess, proof that I am a real person, genuinely female. Mum and I are going out to dinner tonight, not for any particular reason, but I will treat it as a celebration of my official identity. A toast, to Lucy Diamond, official British Citizen!xx
    490 Posted by Lucy Diamond
  • British CitizenA mere two weeks after sending off my application, I have just received my new biometric passport, correct name, correct gender, and a picture that looks like me again. I looked at the new and the old passports together to compare, what a weird feeling, was that really me, a previous life perhaps, a former existence? Just seeing my old name written down seems weird now, let alone official documentation complete with mug-shot. They say no-one likes their passport photo, and I was always a good example of that, but now, for the first time ever, I do; I’m proud of it. I am proud to have a real identity at last, one that I can actually relate to, one that seems to fit.I had a letter from Charing Cross to explain that I was transsexual, apparently happy living in this role, and requesting that a passport be issued in the appropriate gender, I’m not sure if this letter is absolutely necessary, but this along with my change of name deed meant there were no questions asked. I am now officially female wherever in the world I go. Just hope I don’t get strip-searched before I have my SRS.Now I have a passport, I want to use it! Where could I go, hmmm…? Maybe I should save my money, or maybe I will go away for a few days, just because I can. Haven’t been abroad for years, might be nice to get away for a change of scene. But then hopefully Thailand won’t be so far away, time-wise that is!It’s kind of nice to be "official", some sort of validation I guess, proof that I am a real person, genuinely female. Mum and I are going out to dinner tonight, not for any particular reason, but I will treat it as a celebration of my official identity. A toast, to Lucy Diamond, official British Citizen!xx
    Sep 15, 2006 490
  • 02 Sep 2006
    MoondanceI’ve just discovered "free web-hosting" so by popular request I am now able to put up a link to a brief video clip of our band.It was taken on a phone-cam so the picture and sound aren’t great, and you can’t see much except the singer (the odd glimpse of me behind him, yes that’s me honest!) This clip is also not really indicative of what our band do; it’s an old song by an artist who I’m not particularly fond of, but we all enjoy playing this one so it’s in the set. Most of our songs are recent charts hits, which seem to go down great with everyone, but we also throw in a few golden oldies for people who are closer to my age!Anyway, hope this works, if it does it will take a minute to load, so without further ado, ladies and gentlemen, The Mustard Cutters!http://www.bridgehousefarm.co.uk/testing/tmc/videos/Moondance.mp4Is it working?xx
    660 Posted by Lucy Diamond
  • MoondanceI’ve just discovered "free web-hosting" so by popular request I am now able to put up a link to a brief video clip of our band.It was taken on a phone-cam so the picture and sound aren’t great, and you can’t see much except the singer (the odd glimpse of me behind him, yes that’s me honest!) This clip is also not really indicative of what our band do; it’s an old song by an artist who I’m not particularly fond of, but we all enjoy playing this one so it’s in the set. Most of our songs are recent charts hits, which seem to go down great with everyone, but we also throw in a few golden oldies for people who are closer to my age!Anyway, hope this works, if it does it will take a minute to load, so without further ado, ladies and gentlemen, The Mustard Cutters!http://www.bridgehousefarm.co.uk/testing/tmc/videos/Moondance.mp4Is it working?xx
    Sep 02, 2006 660
  • 30 Aug 2006
    Eating, drinking, being merry, oh and working tooYep, it was an interesting weekend, as anticipated…The Caribbean party on Saturday was great fun, someone had gone to a lot of effort to set it all up, as did most of the guests with their fancy dress. We played in a marquee, scattered around were surf boards, deck chairs, inflatable palm trees, that sort of thing. Outside there was a cocktail bar serving rum punch and melony drinks and things, a barbecue cooking the hot food for the buffet, and the poshest portaloos I’ve ever seen; carpets, full-length mirrors, piped muzak, wooden loo seats and so on. Luxury. Anyway never mind the toilets…The evening started with drinks and canapés with a steel-band accompaniment. Bit of limbo dancing by one of the steel band, and then by volunteers from the audience making fools of themselves. Buffet, charity auction (for a holiday in the Caribbean), then our band. We played well and the booze was flowing freely so everyone had a good night. With the excuse of it being a theme party I got the chance to wear a dress for the first time at one of our gigs. I bought it off Ebay last year and never had the occasion to wear it, but it seemed just right for this evening, I knew it would come in useful one day…It was a great night, but a very late one, so bloody hard work too. We had one day to recover from that and were out again on Monday, an early start this time, it being an afternoon gig. The weather in Lancaster was pretty good that day, so that was the main thing for an outdoor gig, and therefore we had a respectable number in the audience. We got a great reaction from the audience and lots of lovely compliments. The singer’s dad shot some video so hopefully we will get some of that onto our website soon, which I will post a link for when we’ve got a bit more on it, as it’s still under construction really.With it being an early start we were all ravenous by the end of the gig, so we decided to go for our first ever "band curry", back in Kendal. Was nice to chill out together, and feast on Indian food, and then go for a few drinkies in some of our favourite haunts. The guy who had played keyboards with the band for a couple of gigs before I joined, came into the restaurant with his wife for a takeaway, so we invited them to join us and have a sit-down meal, which they did; the more the merrier.Anyway I’m just about recovered from all that gigging and eating and drinking, but I think it’s about my bedtime now. Here’s a few pics for you, more in my album, full members only of course: http://gendersociety.com/perl/community/communityalbums.cgi?action=openalbum&albumid=9980160650604&ownerid=9970154724712Can anyone tell me how to make those links appear shorter?!Thanks to mum for taking pics at Lancaster!
    501 Posted by Lucy Diamond
  • Eating, drinking, being merry, oh and working tooYep, it was an interesting weekend, as anticipated…The Caribbean party on Saturday was great fun, someone had gone to a lot of effort to set it all up, as did most of the guests with their fancy dress. We played in a marquee, scattered around were surf boards, deck chairs, inflatable palm trees, that sort of thing. Outside there was a cocktail bar serving rum punch and melony drinks and things, a barbecue cooking the hot food for the buffet, and the poshest portaloos I’ve ever seen; carpets, full-length mirrors, piped muzak, wooden loo seats and so on. Luxury. Anyway never mind the toilets…The evening started with drinks and canapés with a steel-band accompaniment. Bit of limbo dancing by one of the steel band, and then by volunteers from the audience making fools of themselves. Buffet, charity auction (for a holiday in the Caribbean), then our band. We played well and the booze was flowing freely so everyone had a good night. With the excuse of it being a theme party I got the chance to wear a dress for the first time at one of our gigs. I bought it off Ebay last year and never had the occasion to wear it, but it seemed just right for this evening, I knew it would come in useful one day…It was a great night, but a very late one, so bloody hard work too. We had one day to recover from that and were out again on Monday, an early start this time, it being an afternoon gig. The weather in Lancaster was pretty good that day, so that was the main thing for an outdoor gig, and therefore we had a respectable number in the audience. We got a great reaction from the audience and lots of lovely compliments. The singer’s dad shot some video so hopefully we will get some of that onto our website soon, which I will post a link for when we’ve got a bit more on it, as it’s still under construction really.With it being an early start we were all ravenous by the end of the gig, so we decided to go for our first ever "band curry", back in Kendal. Was nice to chill out together, and feast on Indian food, and then go for a few drinkies in some of our favourite haunts. The guy who had played keyboards with the band for a couple of gigs before I joined, came into the restaurant with his wife for a takeaway, so we invited them to join us and have a sit-down meal, which they did; the more the merrier.Anyway I’m just about recovered from all that gigging and eating and drinking, but I think it’s about my bedtime now. Here’s a few pics for you, more in my album, full members only of course: http://gendersociety.com/perl/community/communityalbums.cgi?action=openalbum&albumid=9980160650604&ownerid=9970154724712Can anyone tell me how to make those links appear shorter?!Thanks to mum for taking pics at Lancaster!
    Aug 30, 2006 501
  • 22 Aug 2006
    Rock and roll weekendSo, Friday night our band played their second gig at Kendal’s most prestigious music pub – Bootleggers. I say prestigious because it is their policy to only book decent acts, so if you’re a rubbish band you won’t get on, or if you do, they won’t have you back! The other main music pub in town by the way is Dickie Doodles, where the emphasis is on quantity rather than quality; music of some description every night of the week, but it’s usually half decent at least. Our band has just invested in a shiny new mixing desk so there was a bit more fiddling to do in the soundcheck (I’m chief fiddler and knob twiddler), but there were no problems and nothing broke down as happened last time we played there. It was busy, very busy, with a great crowd as usual, and wow, what a gig. Fantastic. Great reception. Not having had chance to rehearse that week we ran through a new number in the soundcheck – "Monster", by The Automatic. English readers will most likely have found it difficult to avoid this summer. It seemed to sound ok so we played it towards the end of the night. Now it’s kind of a silly song, "What’s that coming over the hill, is it a monster, is it a monster..?" but fun nevertheless. Our bass player had been whining slightly at having to do it, and freely admitted that he was just too old for this sort of stuff, though he’s a LOT younger than me. So I said that if he still didn’t like it after we’d played it live I would personally buy him a pipe and some slippers, and reassured him that this was the sort of song that would get the whole room jumping. This is exactly the effect it had on the room in fact, and I was spared trips to the tobacconist, and Woolworth’s for a pair of old man’s slippers. It’s a great buzz to see so many people jumping up and down in synchronisation to your "beat", but it’s a solid old stone-walled building so the foundations were safe from crumbling I’m sure. Daryl our bass player now likes the song a lot more, ‘nuff said. The whole gig was good though, not just the frenzied reaction from this one song, and we all agreed it was our best gig yet. I’m so happy to be in this band, really loving it.The next night I was off down to see Pip’s band for the first time, glam rock outift – Glamorize. Actually I was there to do more knob-twiddling as Pip had asked me to do the sound for them. Sound engineering is something I’ve done a lot of in the past, working in an arts centre, a recording studio, touring Europe with live bands, not to mention mixing the sound onstage with most of the bands I’ve played in. Not sure what Pip's band thought about a girl doing the sound for them, a transsexual girl at that, but I have to say the sound was awesome and they all thanked me at the end.I was impressed by Pip’s band, a fairly normal looking bunch of blokes when I first met them, who suddenly appeared onstage in sparkly suits, wigs and make up, in true glam rock style. They did look good, all acting rather macho and glammy, with Pip at the back adding a subtle touch of femininity in Pippa’s wig and immaculately applied make up. Lots of practice see…I’d only heard Pip play the drums briefly in his front room, so it was nice to see what he could do for real, and yes, he is very talented. I would be more than happy to play in a band with him, and I am pretty fussy. His new drum kit, following the theft of his old one, looks and sounds great, just the sort of drum sound I like, and one that makes it easy for sound-engineers like me. The band were very together, put on a great show, seemed to be enjoying themselves and got the crowd going. It rocked, and a good night was had by all. It was nice for me to be able to do the sound without having to worry about playing the keyboards at the same time, and of course you can hear it better when you’re in front of the speakers than when you’re onstage! It’s been a few years since I’ve done the sound for a band like that, so I really enjoyed myself. Well done Pip and the rest of the band, and thanks for asking me to help out, it was a real pleasure.Two nights in a row of serious rock and roll and I felt surprisingly healthy the next day, maybe I’m not getting too old for this just yet…Which is just as well as our band has two more gigs over the coming bank-holiday weekend. Saturday is a charity auction for the NSPCC at some rich person’s house on the far shore of Lake Windermere (the exclusive side), which I just found out today is a Caribbean theme, so I have to find something suitably sexy. Shame my grass skirt is at the dry-cleaners. Monday is an outdoors afternoon gig at the Lancaster festival, so it should be an interesting weekend.Today I was seriously frazzled by laser, I’ve had 17 sessions of IPL and 2 of laser, today being the highest power I’ve experienced to date. It bloody hurt, my face was very red, and doesn’t look exactly great even now. It should calm down soon though. After a year of IPL I have seen only slight improvement really, definitely noticeable but not as much as I would have hoped for, which is why I’m now trying the laser. I’ll give that a few goes and then have to decide whether to go for electrolysis (all my friends have had bad experiences with scarring from electrolysis so that concerns me a bit), or see if my doctor will give me Vaniqa, which I’ve heard good reports of, but which is something that would probably have to be used forever. Maybe it’s better to concentrate on permanent hair removal while I’m not working full-time, but not if it means being scarred for life. I guess I won’t know until I try.The pain, the problems, the inconvenience is all worth it. Better to be frazzled by laser than have your brain frazzled by gender dysphoria. Still, I’ll be glad when it’s all over, but realise that all this is part of a very long process.Just gotta keep on rocking.xx
    553 Posted by Lucy Diamond
  • Rock and roll weekendSo, Friday night our band played their second gig at Kendal’s most prestigious music pub – Bootleggers. I say prestigious because it is their policy to only book decent acts, so if you’re a rubbish band you won’t get on, or if you do, they won’t have you back! The other main music pub in town by the way is Dickie Doodles, where the emphasis is on quantity rather than quality; music of some description every night of the week, but it’s usually half decent at least. Our band has just invested in a shiny new mixing desk so there was a bit more fiddling to do in the soundcheck (I’m chief fiddler and knob twiddler), but there were no problems and nothing broke down as happened last time we played there. It was busy, very busy, with a great crowd as usual, and wow, what a gig. Fantastic. Great reception. Not having had chance to rehearse that week we ran through a new number in the soundcheck – "Monster", by The Automatic. English readers will most likely have found it difficult to avoid this summer. It seemed to sound ok so we played it towards the end of the night. Now it’s kind of a silly song, "What’s that coming over the hill, is it a monster, is it a monster..?" but fun nevertheless. Our bass player had been whining slightly at having to do it, and freely admitted that he was just too old for this sort of stuff, though he’s a LOT younger than me. So I said that if he still didn’t like it after we’d played it live I would personally buy him a pipe and some slippers, and reassured him that this was the sort of song that would get the whole room jumping. This is exactly the effect it had on the room in fact, and I was spared trips to the tobacconist, and Woolworth’s for a pair of old man’s slippers. It’s a great buzz to see so many people jumping up and down in synchronisation to your "beat", but it’s a solid old stone-walled building so the foundations were safe from crumbling I’m sure. Daryl our bass player now likes the song a lot more, ‘nuff said. The whole gig was good though, not just the frenzied reaction from this one song, and we all agreed it was our best gig yet. I’m so happy to be in this band, really loving it.The next night I was off down to see Pip’s band for the first time, glam rock outift – Glamorize. Actually I was there to do more knob-twiddling as Pip had asked me to do the sound for them. Sound engineering is something I’ve done a lot of in the past, working in an arts centre, a recording studio, touring Europe with live bands, not to mention mixing the sound onstage with most of the bands I’ve played in. Not sure what Pip's band thought about a girl doing the sound for them, a transsexual girl at that, but I have to say the sound was awesome and they all thanked me at the end.I was impressed by Pip’s band, a fairly normal looking bunch of blokes when I first met them, who suddenly appeared onstage in sparkly suits, wigs and make up, in true glam rock style. They did look good, all acting rather macho and glammy, with Pip at the back adding a subtle touch of femininity in Pippa’s wig and immaculately applied make up. Lots of practice see…I’d only heard Pip play the drums briefly in his front room, so it was nice to see what he could do for real, and yes, he is very talented. I would be more than happy to play in a band with him, and I am pretty fussy. His new drum kit, following the theft of his old one, looks and sounds great, just the sort of drum sound I like, and one that makes it easy for sound-engineers like me. The band were very together, put on a great show, seemed to be enjoying themselves and got the crowd going. It rocked, and a good night was had by all. It was nice for me to be able to do the sound without having to worry about playing the keyboards at the same time, and of course you can hear it better when you’re in front of the speakers than when you’re onstage! It’s been a few years since I’ve done the sound for a band like that, so I really enjoyed myself. Well done Pip and the rest of the band, and thanks for asking me to help out, it was a real pleasure.Two nights in a row of serious rock and roll and I felt surprisingly healthy the next day, maybe I’m not getting too old for this just yet…Which is just as well as our band has two more gigs over the coming bank-holiday weekend. Saturday is a charity auction for the NSPCC at some rich person’s house on the far shore of Lake Windermere (the exclusive side), which I just found out today is a Caribbean theme, so I have to find something suitably sexy. Shame my grass skirt is at the dry-cleaners. Monday is an outdoors afternoon gig at the Lancaster festival, so it should be an interesting weekend.Today I was seriously frazzled by laser, I’ve had 17 sessions of IPL and 2 of laser, today being the highest power I’ve experienced to date. It bloody hurt, my face was very red, and doesn’t look exactly great even now. It should calm down soon though. After a year of IPL I have seen only slight improvement really, definitely noticeable but not as much as I would have hoped for, which is why I’m now trying the laser. I’ll give that a few goes and then have to decide whether to go for electrolysis (all my friends have had bad experiences with scarring from electrolysis so that concerns me a bit), or see if my doctor will give me Vaniqa, which I’ve heard good reports of, but which is something that would probably have to be used forever. Maybe it’s better to concentrate on permanent hair removal while I’m not working full-time, but not if it means being scarred for life. I guess I won’t know until I try.The pain, the problems, the inconvenience is all worth it. Better to be frazzled by laser than have your brain frazzled by gender dysphoria. Still, I’ll be glad when it’s all over, but realise that all this is part of a very long process.Just gotta keep on rocking.xx
    Aug 22, 2006 553
  • 06 Aug 2006
    By the time we got to Woodstock…Or Bowness-on-Windermere even. Last night we played on "The Glebe" at the edge of Lake Windermere for the Windermere Festival, nothing like Woodstock at all in fact, much more of a family affair, though for some reason there were a group of people there in hippie fancy dress, 60’s London fashionable type hippies though, not the crusty Woodstock variety. "By the time we got to Woodstock we were half a million strong", well ok, there weren’t quite that many people there, but several hundred, maybe a thousand or more, and a great atmosphere, a lovely setting for a gig. Most importantly the weather was fine, it wasn’t glorious sunshine but it was warm and dry, a very pleasant evening. In the Lake District that’s pretty good going if you’re tempting fate by playing an open-air festival. The last intended open-air gig, you may recall, ended up with us playing in a garage, with most of the audience huddled under a canopy, and the more drunken ones dancing in the rain. So this was just super, standing onstage looking out across the lake and the mountains, long skirt flowing in the warm, gentle breeze, playing to a great crowd. Apparently we could be heard all across the village so people were flocking down from the pubs in excited anticipation of something actually happening in this quaint little tourist spot.These are the sort of gigs we will look back on, the ones we will tell our grandchildren about, those of us who have any, the ones that make us feel privileged to be in a band and make us realise how lucky we are to live in such a beautiful area. On a typical Saturday night my last band would have been playing in a smoky working men’s club somewhere near Liverpool, bingo in the break, grumpy concert secretaries grumbling that we don’t play any "proper" music, you know, the stuff people played when electric guitars had only just been invented. Microcosms of people stuck in the past, safe in their local club environment, drinking numerous pints of bitter and smoking Woodbines, week in, week out…But whatever makes you happy. As a band we were at our happiest last night, we played well and all really enjoyed it. I’ll post a photo at the end of this blog that I took while we were setting up, you don’t really get the full effect of the scenery from a photograph, especially one of mine, but you’ll get the idea I hope. Everyone, it seems, carries a digital camera around with them these days, so there was clicking and flashing going on all night. The organisers had a photographer there and we had friends and family taking close-ups for us, at one point there were 3 of them milling around the stage snapping away, even lying under the singer’s feet to get that "midst of the action" shot, We felt like rock stars!We finished at 10 and were followed by a rather impressive firework display, I love fireworks, especially big ones! To make the evening perfect we were able to drive right up to the stage and load our gear into our cars without having to take more than 2 steps, wonderful. After such a rare early finish 4 out of 5 of us, the ones without families, decided to go out for a drink in Kendal, so I nipped home and changed into my new sexy bustiere, it was still very warm, and fixed my make up, which doesn’t look its best after a gig. It was nice for a change to be able to wind down after the gig by having a quiet drink and a chat together, instead of all driving off in different directions. Gives you a certain feeling of camaraderie. I could have got a taxi home, but it was such a lovely warm evening I decided to walk it, only about 3 miles and I didn’t have heels on… My shoes weren’t the most comfortable for walking though so my feet were hurting by the time I got home. My legs ache a bit today, I really must get fitter.I’d say that was the best gig we’ve done yet, but I have a strong feeling that there will be even better in the future. This band is just right for me. The role I now live in is also just right for me. It’s a great combination.xx
    526 Posted by Lucy Diamond
  • By the time we got to Woodstock…Or Bowness-on-Windermere even. Last night we played on "The Glebe" at the edge of Lake Windermere for the Windermere Festival, nothing like Woodstock at all in fact, much more of a family affair, though for some reason there were a group of people there in hippie fancy dress, 60’s London fashionable type hippies though, not the crusty Woodstock variety. "By the time we got to Woodstock we were half a million strong", well ok, there weren’t quite that many people there, but several hundred, maybe a thousand or more, and a great atmosphere, a lovely setting for a gig. Most importantly the weather was fine, it wasn’t glorious sunshine but it was warm and dry, a very pleasant evening. In the Lake District that’s pretty good going if you’re tempting fate by playing an open-air festival. The last intended open-air gig, you may recall, ended up with us playing in a garage, with most of the audience huddled under a canopy, and the more drunken ones dancing in the rain. So this was just super, standing onstage looking out across the lake and the mountains, long skirt flowing in the warm, gentle breeze, playing to a great crowd. Apparently we could be heard all across the village so people were flocking down from the pubs in excited anticipation of something actually happening in this quaint little tourist spot.These are the sort of gigs we will look back on, the ones we will tell our grandchildren about, those of us who have any, the ones that make us feel privileged to be in a band and make us realise how lucky we are to live in such a beautiful area. On a typical Saturday night my last band would have been playing in a smoky working men’s club somewhere near Liverpool, bingo in the break, grumpy concert secretaries grumbling that we don’t play any "proper" music, you know, the stuff people played when electric guitars had only just been invented. Microcosms of people stuck in the past, safe in their local club environment, drinking numerous pints of bitter and smoking Woodbines, week in, week out…But whatever makes you happy. As a band we were at our happiest last night, we played well and all really enjoyed it. I’ll post a photo at the end of this blog that I took while we were setting up, you don’t really get the full effect of the scenery from a photograph, especially one of mine, but you’ll get the idea I hope. Everyone, it seems, carries a digital camera around with them these days, so there was clicking and flashing going on all night. The organisers had a photographer there and we had friends and family taking close-ups for us, at one point there were 3 of them milling around the stage snapping away, even lying under the singer’s feet to get that "midst of the action" shot, We felt like rock stars!We finished at 10 and were followed by a rather impressive firework display, I love fireworks, especially big ones! To make the evening perfect we were able to drive right up to the stage and load our gear into our cars without having to take more than 2 steps, wonderful. After such a rare early finish 4 out of 5 of us, the ones without families, decided to go out for a drink in Kendal, so I nipped home and changed into my new sexy bustiere, it was still very warm, and fixed my make up, which doesn’t look its best after a gig. It was nice for a change to be able to wind down after the gig by having a quiet drink and a chat together, instead of all driving off in different directions. Gives you a certain feeling of camaraderie. I could have got a taxi home, but it was such a lovely warm evening I decided to walk it, only about 3 miles and I didn’t have heels on… My shoes weren’t the most comfortable for walking though so my feet were hurting by the time I got home. My legs ache a bit today, I really must get fitter.I’d say that was the best gig we’ve done yet, but I have a strong feeling that there will be even better in the future. This band is just right for me. The role I now live in is also just right for me. It’s a great combination.xx
    Aug 06, 2006 526