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  • 20 Apr 2019
    Reposting a poem I wrote a few years ago about how I feel inside....
    71 Posted by Michelle Lynn
  • 20 Apr 2019
    Hi Everyone, I'm a former GS member, returning and hopefully reconnecting with old friends and acquaintances. Since my previous posts no longer exist, I thought it would be good to start with my story:  Like many of you here, I knew I was TG at early age (7) , but found it impossible to act upon it. I became very good at hiding who I was, but always had this storm raging inside me. There were the episodes of "borrowing" my mothers cloths and dressing up, but that was not a real help.  I also sometimes wondered if I was just trying to be Michelle as an elaborate way to masterbate and not a true reflection of my inner self. This doubt went away, as I realized that the storm inside me subsided and became a calm meadow or a peaceful pond. Any thought of masterbation while dressed, went away. My heart was telling me that I was most at peace as Michelle and it was my true feeling inside.     My social life has had few male friends in it. I simply didn't share the interests that guys enjoy. However, I've always had alot of female friends that I loved spending time with. Instead, music, cooking, photography, skating, computers, and writing became my interests. I still remember wanting so much to wear one of those cute skating skirts and just be me in the skating rink.   As I grew older, social pressure to conform grew bigger and bigger. So I suppressed Michelle and tried to adopt some of the male interests. I started to date women (as a male), but started to over compensate.  They became targets for sex, which caused me pain.  As I was making love as a male, inside, I imagined it was me as the girl. Then I met my future wife.   I fell for her, but didn't know what to do. We dated for 5 years and eventually got married. I buried Michelle even deeper and didn't tell my wife about Michelle until years later, when it became unbearable to keep my secret.   I handled revealing Michelle to her badly. I simply got dressed as Michelle one day and met her (as Michelle) when she got home. She was devastated. She moved out for about a week and then came back.came back.  She said she didn't want to see me as Michelle, but understood my issues.    A sort of detente was reached. I could be Michelle, but not to flaunt it in her face.   We also worked on the "Trust" issues of not having told her about that part of me in the first place.     Today, I work from my home office (as Michelle) and present as my male alter ego when my wife wants to do anything.  It's not ideal, as my original plan was to fully transition and live as the true me, but I love my wife.   So, Thats my story.   Linda T, I noticed you posting was from 2014.  What has happened since then?   Hugs, Michelle Lynn
    63 Posted by Michelle Lynn
  • 21 May 2019
    Good morning!  It is a rainy day today here in the San Francisco Bay area. A day for staying in and relaxing. I recently finished a consulting contract, so I'm taking some time to relax before my next deal. It is good to just relax and enjoy just being the real me!   In my dreams I engage my next client as the real me (Michelle), instead of her "brother". A purge set me back quite a bit, in terms of cloths, makeup , shoes, and confidence. I don't really have any office appropriate attire yet, and I have to rebuild my confidence to go out, be in public, and work in a client office.   So once I've restocked my wardrobe and gained some more confidence, I'll would like to start doing consulting as the real me, not my silly "brother".   Michelle Lynn
    55 Posted by Michelle Lynn
  • 15 May 2019
    Hi Everyone,   I'm making progress on reacquiring my Michelle stuff.  My progress so far:   1. New undergarments -  Didn't realize how much a body can change after 3 years. Unfortunately,  I jumped 2 sizes (sad).  Pulled out my old NordicTrack and started a diet. I plan on slimming down and losing 10-15 pounds.   2. New Wig - My old wig was a cute shoulder length wig. It was light brown with some red highlights. I decided to go with a longer (mid shoulder blade) wig. It is medium brown, with lots of curls.   3. New Silicone Breast forms - My old ones made me a "B" cup.  The new ones fill out a "C" cup nicely. I decided to be a bit more bold as Michelle.   4. Cloths - All my old favorite things were gone.  As I searched for replacements, it was sad to note that I could not find similar replacements.  I'm going slow here because I hope to slim down before making major purchases.  However, I did get 3 pair of nice leggings, some cami's, a pair of denim shorts, and a couple of cute tops. (Summer in Northern California can he cold in the morning and hot by noon). Finally, a Girlfriend of mine told me, she does have a couple of dresses of mine I can have back.   5. Shoes - My old shoes were cute Mary Jane's, some Ballet flats, and 3" High heels. As I looked at girls my age at the mall, they were wearing either cute sandal style shoes, or simple athletic shoes. Not very stylish, even at the high end fashion malls here. I'm going to do a bit of hunting to see if I can find some nice open-toed Mary Janes, some pumps and high heels.  All depends on my budget.   6. Makeup kit - I used to use Bare Minerals makeup, but now I need a better foundation and something to hide my aging lines.  For now, my profile picture,  I used Crayons as my makeup. However, it does show my happy feeling inside.   What makeup do you older girls (my age) use? I hope I didn't bore you, as I restock my Michelle things.    Best Regards, Michelle Lynn
    51 Posted by Michelle Lynn
Society Girl's Personal Blogs 63 views May 23, 2019
Today's True Joy...

Today, I let my inner self out to take over. For the first time in years, I feel an absolutely wonderful and warm feeling all over.  My heart just wants to shout with joy. The real me asked "Why did you wait so long?", you know I've been here all along.

 

It's funny how we let the day to day business of living drowned out our inner joy and force us to accept compromises. Thats now finished!  As I sit here typing, there is a warmth of knowing the freedom that I can be whoever I want to be.  Sure, there may be setbacks, complications and adjustments, but that should not deter me from being who I truly am. 

 

I am Michelle , a beautiful women. I should stop hiding myself, and start living as my true self. So now I resolve to take active steps to make that a reality. 

 

A Woman bubbling with joy,

 

Michelle Lynn


Tags: #Joy  #happiness  #Feelings 

Comments

1 comment
  • Briana Purcell likes this
  • Briana Purcell
    Briana Purcell That is awesome Michelle - I am so happy for you! Those moments are so uplifting and exhilarating! All the best to you in your journey! hugs, Briana : )