acceptance

• Posted by Faye Morrow November 15, 2011 Filed in Society Girl's Personal Blogs #  1,803 views
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  After many years of uncertainty and regret i have finally come to terms with myself. self acceptance if you will. i have seen my therapist twice as myself now and i am certain that i am making the right choice. i am choosing to live full time but it will be on a gradient. no more rushing in panic and haste. i have chosen to lay down the groundwork for my transition and through this course of action i hope the impact of my changes will be gradual and consistant.

  Acceptance from others plays a huge part but this, rather than fear inducing as it has been, acceptance has to come from within. if i am not confident or comfortable as i am then why would others be? i will come out in my own time and as i change from the male i was born into the woman i want to become i no longer feel the need to live up to others expectantions of me both male and female. we only get one life and i intend to live mine as i choose.

  i am more confident in public now and i am striving to achieve my goals. A simple matter of going to the cash point as a woman used to fill me with dread. now i see it as a thing to do, that must be done regardless and i achieve this by just doing it rather than think of all the negative things that can or will happen. sometimes our own minds keep us from moving forwards. acceptance is a something we strive for regardless of gender. i just don't want mine to get in the way. you can not tell how people will react but all you can do is live your life and deal with whatever happens on your terms. i hope to be living full time by next summer, the road ahead leads forwards and i will no longer want to go backwards or sideways although life has a habit of stopping you. its how i carry on that matters most. i have family and work to contend with but i know so long as i am true to myself and use my support mechanisms i can achieve anything. Acceptance is no longer the driving factor behind my life. Truth however is.

   

  Faye. x