Still

• Posted by Rachel de Blanc May 28, 2011 #  2,234 views
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  This a little test to see how the super-dooper up-dated blog pages works, and it works very well. So let's see whether my brain and typing are as reliable and simple to access..

   

  Hi everyone, anyone or no-one, I hope you're all OK. 

   

  This isn't going to be a lengthy expose of my past or a revelatory re-definition of my present, it's just an opportunity to idle over a cup of tea and contribute a tiny amount to the comings and goings of GS.

   

  I'm not progressing at the moment, of course I'm getting a little older and wiser, but I'm not out, relaxed and active as a trans-woman, and so self-critically I could suggest that I'm a non-contributor. No, I am a non-contributor, full stop. I hope someone can forgive me for that or at least appreciate the cir***stance. Perhaps someone will reassure me that change will ultimately take place and that it will be necessary, accepted and positive for all. 

   

  I read that one of the non-disclosed Super-Injunction persons is a 'member of the public who does not wish to reveal their sex-change'. That's a sad and simultaneously positive statement to read. I hope she secures the seclusion that she needs. But how can you ensure that your friends and family abide by the same restrictions, unless you've entirely separated yourself from them, have disappeared and started again? If she uses this site, hello and best wishes.

   

  I might visit a psychiatrist and gauge an opinion. I've always wondered what the educated, gentle penetrating mind may unearth or confirm. Has anyone actually been knocked-back and told that they're not TS but CD and felt good about that interpretation I wonder? That fact that I've just typed that implies doubt in my own mind I guess, but I'm not doubtful, I'm just still. Still too conscious of others, still to scared of loss, still to bloody conservative and still too capable of living my li(f)e. I have an absolutely fantastic wife and a son I adore. How can I do anything to disrupt that?

   

  Poor Cheryl Cole, 'sacked' from US X-Factor for an Geordie Accent and according to Heat Magazine's front cover she now has 'problem knees'. If I was Cheryl - pause for a dreamy moment, I'd hire an expert speech therapist and avoid kneeling for a bit. That would sort those two issue out. Cheryl, you've really not got anything to worry about 'Pet'. You're sorted.

   

  Hi and bye to one and all.

   

  Rachel