Please Visit Our Sponsor





User's Tags

Rachel de Blanc 's Entries

105 blogs
  • 17 Apr 2009
    A quick window-shop between business errands and an impromptu encounter with a former colleague whilst gazing into a fashion-house window. A laughed-off throwaway excuse. Good job I wasn’t walking out with bags full of goodies.. I need to get some stuff. Shoes, a dress or perhaps an eighties inspired big t-shirt with a wide belt and leggings, can I carry off tight trousers, do my arms need to be covered, some knickers would be nice, a bra for comfort of sorts. Some spring make-up, foliage for the face. A wig. I don’t think I should shop on line any more, and I don’t wish to lie “For my wife, sister, it’s a present” so there’s nothing for it but to keep my head down, request assistance pleasantly and avert gazes. I could just say ‘It’s for me – are you open minded?” and await a reaction. Does that work? The ultimate plan? To perhaps down a few Vodka’s during breakfast (Dutch courage) and make a day of it. Become braver with each purchase and allow inhibitions to fade. But that’s not me, I’d stumble and puke. Are busy shopping days better than quiet days? Is it harder shopping in drab with excuses than en-femme with anxiety? On-line. Avoiding again, a probability.
    530 Posted by Rachel de Blanc
  • A quick window-shop between business errands and an impromptu encounter with a former colleague whilst gazing into a fashion-house window. A laughed-off throwaway excuse. Good job I wasn’t walking out with bags full of goodies.. I need to get some stuff. Shoes, a dress or perhaps an eighties inspired big t-shirt with a wide belt and leggings, can I carry off tight trousers, do my arms need to be covered, some knickers would be nice, a bra for comfort of sorts. Some spring make-up, foliage for the face. A wig. I don’t think I should shop on line any more, and I don’t wish to lie “For my wife, sister, it’s a present” so there’s nothing for it but to keep my head down, request assistance pleasantly and avert gazes. I could just say ‘It’s for me – are you open minded?” and await a reaction. Does that work? The ultimate plan? To perhaps down a few Vodka’s during breakfast (Dutch courage) and make a day of it. Become braver with each purchase and allow inhibitions to fade. But that’s not me, I’d stumble and puke. Are busy shopping days better than quiet days? Is it harder shopping in drab with excuses than en-femme with anxiety? On-line. Avoiding again, a probability.
    Apr 17, 2009 530
  • 08 Apr 2009
    You can hold it all at bay so long, then without warning you’re engulfed and flooded, squashed and flattened, sopped and splattered. It almost helps just typing that out, but opening the window and screaming ‘For F***k’s Sake’ feels more appropriate but it’s a shame to spoil the sunlit Spring air with profanities. Oh, so what do I mean by everything? Well EVERYTHING! My everything is professional, personal, financial and yes, sexual - by which I mean gender. Did Morrissey ever pen a song entitled ‘Today Everything Just Got To Me’? Well if he didn’t he should have. I can picture him spiralling around with a Gladioli stuck up his jeans, quiff bouffant under Top of the Pops lighting. So this blog - and you dear reader, become the unwitting recipients of self-centred narcissistic rubbish like this. Thanks for the service TW, otherwise I’d been cutting this into my arm like a Manic Street Preacher. It’s a lovely Spring Day. Pleasantly warm, fluffy white clouds. I’m sitting in a lonely place, typing. Perhaps it’s time to get out and smell the roses.
    570 Posted by Rachel de Blanc
  • You can hold it all at bay so long, then without warning you’re engulfed and flooded, squashed and flattened, sopped and splattered. It almost helps just typing that out, but opening the window and screaming ‘For F***k’s Sake’ feels more appropriate but it’s a shame to spoil the sunlit Spring air with profanities. Oh, so what do I mean by everything? Well EVERYTHING! My everything is professional, personal, financial and yes, sexual - by which I mean gender. Did Morrissey ever pen a song entitled ‘Today Everything Just Got To Me’? Well if he didn’t he should have. I can picture him spiralling around with a Gladioli stuck up his jeans, quiff bouffant under Top of the Pops lighting. So this blog - and you dear reader, become the unwitting recipients of self-centred narcissistic rubbish like this. Thanks for the service TW, otherwise I’d been cutting this into my arm like a Manic Street Preacher. It’s a lovely Spring Day. Pleasantly warm, fluffy white clouds. I’m sitting in a lonely place, typing. Perhaps it’s time to get out and smell the roses.
    Apr 08, 2009 570
  • 24 Mar 2009
    I have recently remembered a significant event from my childhood, which provides a little insight into what was to follow. On the bedside table of my grandparent’s house, where I would occasionally stay when my parents were at an event, was a children’s novel, The Water Babies, by Charles Kingsley. That small, leather-bound book was always too long to read during the course of one evening (hey, I was about 4 or 5..) and so I often failed to progress beyond the first few chapters. The main character (a chimney boy) flees his employment and whilst chased falls into a stream, where immersed within the water he is magically transformed into a Water Baby. The morals of the story, a comment upon Victorian emancipation, a metaphorical religious awakening, social commentary etc were all lost on me. I was however, completely fascinated by the transformation of this urchin into a magical water-borne infant, and the process the child went through. I eagerly anticipated re-reading the opening chapters and falling asleep dreaming of some magical physical change. Have you read it?
    559 Posted by Rachel de Blanc
  • I have recently remembered a significant event from my childhood, which provides a little insight into what was to follow. On the bedside table of my grandparent’s house, where I would occasionally stay when my parents were at an event, was a children’s novel, The Water Babies, by Charles Kingsley. That small, leather-bound book was always too long to read during the course of one evening (hey, I was about 4 or 5..) and so I often failed to progress beyond the first few chapters. The main character (a chimney boy) flees his employment and whilst chased falls into a stream, where immersed within the water he is magically transformed into a Water Baby. The morals of the story, a comment upon Victorian emancipation, a metaphorical religious awakening, social commentary etc were all lost on me. I was however, completely fascinated by the transformation of this urchin into a magical water-borne infant, and the process the child went through. I eagerly anticipated re-reading the opening chapters and falling asleep dreaming of some magical physical change. Have you read it?
    Mar 24, 2009 559
  • 23 Mar 2009
    My SO will be away soon over the course of a weekend. I’m sorry to admit that I am relishing the thought of this free time, when I can do as I please, as Rachel. I’m normally a skulker, dressing in the shadows whilst living in a state of confusion in the daylight. (Funny that – wonder whether I’d prefer to be a vampire?) If I organise myself, perhaps this is the moment to be brave enough to step out and to even meet other girls? This is something I must do, but as yet, haven’t. So dare I?
    578 Posted by Rachel de Blanc
  • My SO will be away soon over the course of a weekend. I’m sorry to admit that I am relishing the thought of this free time, when I can do as I please, as Rachel. I’m normally a skulker, dressing in the shadows whilst living in a state of confusion in the daylight. (Funny that – wonder whether I’d prefer to be a vampire?) If I organise myself, perhaps this is the moment to be brave enough to step out and to even meet other girls? This is something I must do, but as yet, haven’t. So dare I?
    Mar 23, 2009 578
  • 09 Mar 2009
    What on earth generated 16 visits to my blog in one day I wonder? Then almost immediately I remember that I was Trannyweb Member of the Day last Wednesday and assume that must be the reason. I suspect these curious souls may not be returning too quickly, given the rather dull fare on offer. I still have my upper deck moments, head in the clouds, dreamy and away with the fairies. My lower deck has been industrious and too damn busy since the turn of the year, and my engine is tired, spluttering a little, in need of a service. The driver – ever anxious and cautious about progress travels a familiar route avoiding mishaps and refuses to take provocative turns. The conductor on the other hand is aware that there is another route and patiently waits to see if the momentum ever takes us there. The bell rings and off we go again, until the next stop.
    584 Posted by Rachel de Blanc
  • What on earth generated 16 visits to my blog in one day I wonder? Then almost immediately I remember that I was Trannyweb Member of the Day last Wednesday and assume that must be the reason. I suspect these curious souls may not be returning too quickly, given the rather dull fare on offer. I still have my upper deck moments, head in the clouds, dreamy and away with the fairies. My lower deck has been industrious and too damn busy since the turn of the year, and my engine is tired, spluttering a little, in need of a service. The driver – ever anxious and cautious about progress travels a familiar route avoiding mishaps and refuses to take provocative turns. The conductor on the other hand is aware that there is another route and patiently waits to see if the momentum ever takes us there. The bell rings and off we go again, until the next stop.
    Mar 09, 2009 584
  • 28 Feb 2009
    I wonder whether there is any statistical evidence to confirm that women read blogs more than men? I recently listened to a radio article about blogs, about their existence and whether they perform a function. The conversation suggested that to be successful, a blog needs to develop its’ own form and structure. It suggested that aimless typing (such as this) was the scourge of blogs, being unnecessary, often boring, frequently vain and often vacuous. I sense that blogging, possibly even internet social-networking has reached a maturity, or at least, within the developed world this means of communication has reached a plateau. After five years of Facebook, if you haven’t already joined then you are possibly unlikely to.. In my opinion, TWeb’s turnover – if I can describe it as such, seems to have reduced a little. Why is this? What’s next for social networking sites, how do they sustain themselves? During the same week, I also heard another radio article about Gentlemen’s Clubs, one of the last bastions of the privileged male, privately-educated upper class. Once cigar-filled and full of echoed mutterings about business and cricket, they too are in decline and must change to survive. There’s no direct link between Gentlemen’s Clubs and TWeb of course (not perceivably at least) but both offer an environment where an individual can communicate and be embraced within a comforting, understanding world. Not a great philosophical train of thought I appreciate, or particularly insightful, but I’d be interested to know if anyone else has similar views. Perhaps this illustrates one key rule about blogging. Don’t do it unless you have a real reason to do so. This is why the high water mark of blogging may have passed. Unless you can write or have something stimulating to say, don’t do it. I’ll write something aimless again in the not too distant future. Unless I can think of something to say of course, in which case, I may say it sooner.
    649 Posted by Rachel de Blanc
  • I wonder whether there is any statistical evidence to confirm that women read blogs more than men? I recently listened to a radio article about blogs, about their existence and whether they perform a function. The conversation suggested that to be successful, a blog needs to develop its’ own form and structure. It suggested that aimless typing (such as this) was the scourge of blogs, being unnecessary, often boring, frequently vain and often vacuous. I sense that blogging, possibly even internet social-networking has reached a maturity, or at least, within the developed world this means of communication has reached a plateau. After five years of Facebook, if you haven’t already joined then you are possibly unlikely to.. In my opinion, TWeb’s turnover – if I can describe it as such, seems to have reduced a little. Why is this? What’s next for social networking sites, how do they sustain themselves? During the same week, I also heard another radio article about Gentlemen’s Clubs, one of the last bastions of the privileged male, privately-educated upper class. Once cigar-filled and full of echoed mutterings about business and cricket, they too are in decline and must change to survive. There’s no direct link between Gentlemen’s Clubs and TWeb of course (not perceivably at least) but both offer an environment where an individual can communicate and be embraced within a comforting, understanding world. Not a great philosophical train of thought I appreciate, or particularly insightful, but I’d be interested to know if anyone else has similar views. Perhaps this illustrates one key rule about blogging. Don’t do it unless you have a real reason to do so. This is why the high water mark of blogging may have passed. Unless you can write or have something stimulating to say, don’t do it. I’ll write something aimless again in the not too distant future. Unless I can think of something to say of course, in which case, I may say it sooner.
    Feb 28, 2009 649
  • 02 Feb 2009
    On a fairly full bus yesterday I noticed an embroidered petty-coat hemline and heavily jewel encrusted hands of a fellow passenger. As she read the News of The World she travelled across North London within her own private but yet public world, brave enough to allow herself out to play, to step outside into another place. Thankfully the cold weather and warm hearts of the other passengers gave this person some privacy, but I’m afraid to say that I felt sympathetic and concerned. I was concerned that the over-elaborate manifestation of femininity would draw attention to her and provoke attention. I was concerned about that person’s welfare and state-of-mind. I was sympathetic because I could appreciate what had driven her was beyond her control and not timetabled. I left the bus and couldn’t help but reflect upon the choice of clothes, the wig and the jewellery. But I did that from the comfort of a coward’s disguise. It was her cough that couldn’t be hidden. I hope it clears up soon, so that she can read her paper in privacy.
    623 Posted by Rachel de Blanc
  • On a fairly full bus yesterday I noticed an embroidered petty-coat hemline and heavily jewel encrusted hands of a fellow passenger. As she read the News of The World she travelled across North London within her own private but yet public world, brave enough to allow herself out to play, to step outside into another place. Thankfully the cold weather and warm hearts of the other passengers gave this person some privacy, but I’m afraid to say that I felt sympathetic and concerned. I was concerned that the over-elaborate manifestation of femininity would draw attention to her and provoke attention. I was concerned about that person’s welfare and state-of-mind. I was sympathetic because I could appreciate what had driven her was beyond her control and not timetabled. I left the bus and couldn’t help but reflect upon the choice of clothes, the wig and the jewellery. But I did that from the comfort of a coward’s disguise. It was her cough that couldn’t be hidden. I hope it clears up soon, so that she can read her paper in privacy.
    Feb 02, 2009 623
  • 25 Jan 2009
    As my SO informed me that she would be out on Friday evening, I returned home at pace keen to take a long relaxing shower, a quick facial and to simply relax and unwind. Fortunately I had ‘un-dressed’ and was preparing a meal when at least 3 hours prior to the time I expected her to arrive, she returned home. This was one of my closest calls. (interesting how closet and closest are so similar..) and left me anxious, jumpy and concerned about tell tale signs of make-up removal. This is all so awful, the deceit, the anxiety the duplicated mixed-up me. She doesn’t deserve it and I cannot divorce myself from who I am. Such a shame that life doesn’t come with a restart button marked ‘female’ which I would press now. Anyhow. If that suggests that I’m a bit down, you’re wrong – I’m very pleased to say. Life’s good, it’s just that I’m not living quite the life I’d like to be, and that’s just not quite fair.
    644 Posted by Rachel de Blanc
  • As my SO informed me that she would be out on Friday evening, I returned home at pace keen to take a long relaxing shower, a quick facial and to simply relax and unwind. Fortunately I had ‘un-dressed’ and was preparing a meal when at least 3 hours prior to the time I expected her to arrive, she returned home. This was one of my closest calls. (interesting how closet and closest are so similar..) and left me anxious, jumpy and concerned about tell tale signs of make-up removal. This is all so awful, the deceit, the anxiety the duplicated mixed-up me. She doesn’t deserve it and I cannot divorce myself from who I am. Such a shame that life doesn’t come with a restart button marked ‘female’ which I would press now. Anyhow. If that suggests that I’m a bit down, you’re wrong – I’m very pleased to say. Life’s good, it’s just that I’m not living quite the life I’d like to be, and that’s just not quite fair.
    Jan 25, 2009 644
  • 05 Jan 2009
    Whilst visiting a Museum over the holidays I used the toilets, which in this case were unisex cubicles. Lying on adjacent to the washbasin was a ring, not jewelled or of financial value, possibly even the content of a Christmas Cracker. An embroidered circular face, glistening and plastic, gold and bronze-like. The metal could be expanded to receive digits of varying diameter. Handy. So I took it. I am wearing it now, a quiet signifier. So do I commence the year as a thief, a magpie or a recycler? I purchased – entirely legally, a book by Ray Robinson entitled The Man Without, and have stolen a few moments to read a few chapters. The story of a transvestite caring for an elderly relative, a book to read in silence and in private. So purchased but requiring the theft of time. Whilst watching an Almodovar DVD (Bad Education) my mother turned away in disgust at the actions of one of the transvestite characters. My wife joking (I believe) announced that ‘I had an interest in transvestites’ to which my mother directly responded, ‘Is he a transvestite?’ I chose not to respond but remained focused upon my game. My game it appears, remains similar to the last year’s past times. Stealth, Discretion, Avoidance – a suitable title for a future Almodovar flick perhaps? The ring on my right hand feels comfortable as I type. Happy New Year.
    577 Posted by Rachel de Blanc
  • Whilst visiting a Museum over the holidays I used the toilets, which in this case were unisex cubicles. Lying on adjacent to the washbasin was a ring, not jewelled or of financial value, possibly even the content of a Christmas Cracker. An embroidered circular face, glistening and plastic, gold and bronze-like. The metal could be expanded to receive digits of varying diameter. Handy. So I took it. I am wearing it now, a quiet signifier. So do I commence the year as a thief, a magpie or a recycler? I purchased – entirely legally, a book by Ray Robinson entitled The Man Without, and have stolen a few moments to read a few chapters. The story of a transvestite caring for an elderly relative, a book to read in silence and in private. So purchased but requiring the theft of time. Whilst watching an Almodovar DVD (Bad Education) my mother turned away in disgust at the actions of one of the transvestite characters. My wife joking (I believe) announced that ‘I had an interest in transvestites’ to which my mother directly responded, ‘Is he a transvestite?’ I chose not to respond but remained focused upon my game. My game it appears, remains similar to the last year’s past times. Stealth, Discretion, Avoidance – a suitable title for a future Almodovar flick perhaps? The ring on my right hand feels comfortable as I type. Happy New Year.
    Jan 05, 2009 577
  • 22 Dec 2008
    My mobile phones rings as I receive an incoming phone-call and my wife enquires ‘What are you doing now?’ and moves to look. Katie’s note about the December issue of Tranny Tribune drops onto the screen and so I exclaim that it’s a message about a Christmas delivery. I’m not certain the news ‘I believe I’m transsexual’ would make best the Christmas present - too many Christmas stockings jokes and offers of mince pies might follow, but looking beyond into the cold and clear blue of the New Year I feel I have to resolve this matter. It’s time to either explain and discover the depth of our relationship, or if possible cease a few things (such as using this site) and focus upon career, finance and real life matters. Father Christmas hasn’t delivered upon my life-long wish yet and it’s not available from Amazon as far as I’m aware, so I’m the only person who can make this dream come true. I hope you all have a Happy Christmas. If the things that you’d like do not miraculously arrive I wish you every success finding them in 2009.
    548 Posted by Rachel de Blanc
  • My mobile phones rings as I receive an incoming phone-call and my wife enquires ‘What are you doing now?’ and moves to look. Katie’s note about the December issue of Tranny Tribune drops onto the screen and so I exclaim that it’s a message about a Christmas delivery. I’m not certain the news ‘I believe I’m transsexual’ would make best the Christmas present - too many Christmas stockings jokes and offers of mince pies might follow, but looking beyond into the cold and clear blue of the New Year I feel I have to resolve this matter. It’s time to either explain and discover the depth of our relationship, or if possible cease a few things (such as using this site) and focus upon career, finance and real life matters. Father Christmas hasn’t delivered upon my life-long wish yet and it’s not available from Amazon as far as I’m aware, so I’m the only person who can make this dream come true. I hope you all have a Happy Christmas. If the things that you’d like do not miraculously arrive I wish you every success finding them in 2009.
    Dec 22, 2008 548