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  • 31 Jul 2009
      So long since I blogged I thought I’d better read my last one before I wrote this, see where I’d got up too. So apparently at a gig I turned down a guy 20 years younger, well, he really was too drunk, and not my type, but I seem to have made up for it at Sparkle… I was working on the Saturday night so me and Gillian went down late afternoon on the Sunday. We checked in and went out to our favourite eating place to line our stomachs. Bumped into 4 of the TW girls whilst we were crossing Canal Street. Of course I wasn’t made up, hadn’t done my hair, in jeans and a t-shirt, not even wearing a bra, sorry for my slovenly appearance girls! I tidied myself up for the evening, honest. Nice to meet Tracey, who is great fun in the chat room, a fellow rum drinker, and, strikingly beautiful actually. Sorry we didn’t get chance to chat more, Trace. Anyway, later, after drinking much and chatting to virtually everyone in every pub we went to, I became aware of some guy staring across at me, outside in the smoking area of Napoleon’s (I was talking to a smoker, not smoking myself). So I asked him what he was staring at, not the best chat up line perhaps, but he said, "Sorry, I can’t take my eyes off you ‘cos you’re so gorgeous". "Oh stop…" Well actually he was gorgeous, and obviously much younger than me, 18 years younger in fact. He was no more drunk than me, and very sweet, so one thing led to another and I dragged him back to my hotel room, checking that Gilly was ok first. Yes, she was chatting up someone else of course. Well, I’m not bragging or anything, but it was nice to pick up a 28 year old who was like, totally into me. He was nice, and it was all very lovely, but he probably wasn’t boyfriend material (too young!) so I didn’t bother giving him my number. I know I know, I’m a shameless hussy, there I’ve said it, so you don’t need to comment on that thank you! It was very, very nice; I’m approaching 2 years post-op and things have obviously improved since last November, god that’s an age, but then again, that guy was Jamaican. Despite the last time being on a sun-drenched, secluded beach, this time was kind of more romantic, and natural, and kind of felt right, as well as, um, good. Anyway, that’s enough of that, I’m sure no-one wants to know, just wanted to enter it into my online, somewhat public diary. It’s the only diary I keep after all. So I’m off on holiday again in a couple of weeks, South-west France this time, on the coast near Bordeaux, and er, a nudist resort. This is something I’ve never done before, but I’ve spent plenty of time on nude beaches so I’m sure I’ll soon get used to it. I expect buying Croissants in the morning and dining out in the nude will feel a little weird at first, but I’m no longer ashamed of my body like I used to be. This is something I never would have done in my former life. I was a little apprehensive before I booked it, but I’m really looking forward to it now. The summer in England seems to have deserted us, rather predictably once again. We did have few days heatwave weeks ago, I guess that was our lot. Looking forward to swimming in the sea again, (is the Atlantic cold down there?) I’ve now got up to 64 lengths at the pool – a whole mile! Still got a fat tummy though. Well I guess that will do for now, but I will leave you with a few pics of a couple of recent gigs that were great fun to do. One was at a posh country house on the side of Lake Windermere, the view I had whilst playing was even better, looking up the lake, but you get the idea. The other gig, as you will see, was a birthday party with a James Bond theme, everyone in fancy dress, including the band, well, sort of. Obviously our singer had to be James (and god he looked handsome), but I thought the other guys should have gone as Odd-job, nick-nack and Blofeld. They chickened out and got some T-shirts printed instead. I felt I couldn’t really get away with being a Bond girl, and don’t look great in a catsuit, so I did kind of a generic Moneypenny, more of a secretary/librarian really, but approaching the look of the one in the Timothy Dalton films - glasses, hair tied up, with a short pencil skirt and satin blouse. Great fun. And hmm, I think some of the band have a secret, librarian fetish thing going on… soundchecking bedazzled bond guys james & moneypenny
    2766 Posted by Lucy Diamond
  •   So long since I blogged I thought I’d better read my last one before I wrote this, see where I’d got up too. So apparently at a gig I turned down a guy 20 years younger, well, he really was too drunk, and not my type, but I seem to have made up for it at Sparkle… I was working on the Saturday night so me and Gillian went down late afternoon on the Sunday. We checked in and went out to our favourite eating place to line our stomachs. Bumped into 4 of the TW girls whilst we were crossing Canal Street. Of course I wasn’t made up, hadn’t done my hair, in jeans and a t-shirt, not even wearing a bra, sorry for my slovenly appearance girls! I tidied myself up for the evening, honest. Nice to meet Tracey, who is great fun in the chat room, a fellow rum drinker, and, strikingly beautiful actually. Sorry we didn’t get chance to chat more, Trace. Anyway, later, after drinking much and chatting to virtually everyone in every pub we went to, I became aware of some guy staring across at me, outside in the smoking area of Napoleon’s (I was talking to a smoker, not smoking myself). So I asked him what he was staring at, not the best chat up line perhaps, but he said, "Sorry, I can’t take my eyes off you ‘cos you’re so gorgeous". "Oh stop…" Well actually he was gorgeous, and obviously much younger than me, 18 years younger in fact. He was no more drunk than me, and very sweet, so one thing led to another and I dragged him back to my hotel room, checking that Gilly was ok first. Yes, she was chatting up someone else of course. Well, I’m not bragging or anything, but it was nice to pick up a 28 year old who was like, totally into me. He was nice, and it was all very lovely, but he probably wasn’t boyfriend material (too young!) so I didn’t bother giving him my number. I know I know, I’m a shameless hussy, there I’ve said it, so you don’t need to comment on that thank you! It was very, very nice; I’m approaching 2 years post-op and things have obviously improved since last November, god that’s an age, but then again, that guy was Jamaican. Despite the last time being on a sun-drenched, secluded beach, this time was kind of more romantic, and natural, and kind of felt right, as well as, um, good. Anyway, that’s enough of that, I’m sure no-one wants to know, just wanted to enter it into my online, somewhat public diary. It’s the only diary I keep after all. So I’m off on holiday again in a couple of weeks, South-west France this time, on the coast near Bordeaux, and er, a nudist resort. This is something I’ve never done before, but I’ve spent plenty of time on nude beaches so I’m sure I’ll soon get used to it. I expect buying Croissants in the morning and dining out in the nude will feel a little weird at first, but I’m no longer ashamed of my body like I used to be. This is something I never would have done in my former life. I was a little apprehensive before I booked it, but I’m really looking forward to it now. The summer in England seems to have deserted us, rather predictably once again. We did have few days heatwave weeks ago, I guess that was our lot. Looking forward to swimming in the sea again, (is the Atlantic cold down there?) I’ve now got up to 64 lengths at the pool – a whole mile! Still got a fat tummy though. Well I guess that will do for now, but I will leave you with a few pics of a couple of recent gigs that were great fun to do. One was at a posh country house on the side of Lake Windermere, the view I had whilst playing was even better, looking up the lake, but you get the idea. The other gig, as you will see, was a birthday party with a James Bond theme, everyone in fancy dress, including the band, well, sort of. Obviously our singer had to be James (and god he looked handsome), but I thought the other guys should have gone as Odd-job, nick-nack and Blofeld. They chickened out and got some T-shirts printed instead. I felt I couldn’t really get away with being a Bond girl, and don’t look great in a catsuit, so I did kind of a generic Moneypenny, more of a secretary/librarian really, but approaching the look of the one in the Timothy Dalton films - glasses, hair tied up, with a short pencil skirt and satin blouse. Great fun. And hmm, I think some of the band have a secret, librarian fetish thing going on… soundchecking bedazzled bond guys james & moneypenny
    Jul 31, 2009 2766
  • 20 May 2011
    I'm feeling totally fk'd off with things right now. Since January i've had to put up with harassment & Abuse from an idiot neighbour of mine. It started with him ringing my bell at 2 in the morning & progressed to him actually ringing my front door bell in the earlt hours too. Since then, the dirty b*****d hyad left condoms outside my door, thrown eggs at my windows, Shoved some real SICK notes under my door, too sick to even repeat. So i got on to my local council & police ( several times) & to be honest they've done NOTHING to help sort my problems out.  Recently they came & fitted Strong Bolts to my door, then i actually felt SAFE in my own home. But today they dropped a bombshell on me by saying that the door they had added bolts to was a fire-door & they were gonna come and take them off. I have to say i was well & truly p*ssed off as this was the only thing stopping the tw@t from getting to my front door and to be told the bolts were coming off was a real kick in the teeth. Round here it seens like the rights of the abuser come before those of the victiim & that is not fair. The Council even offered me another place & i told them in no uncertain terms i was'nae moving  because they couldn't be bothered to move the Problem. I Have since been to a solicitor who's been a great help, & i've been advised that if this trouble carries on, that they can apply to the courts for an injunction/ Harassment order banning him from contacting or coming near me. I hope this does the trick becuase i'm not sure how much more i can take before i do summat i dont want to. One thing i DID hear was that this t*sser was wantin to move away, i just wish he would & i could suggest a place for him.....10 miles out to sea with pocketfuls of lead.     I'm feeling a tad happier now, but earlier today i could'nae stop cryin.
    2710 Posted by Anna-Marie Trindall
  • I'm feeling totally fk'd off with things right now. Since January i've had to put up with harassment & Abuse from an idiot neighbour of mine. It started with him ringing my bell at 2 in the morning & progressed to him actually ringing my front door bell in the earlt hours too. Since then, the dirty b*****d hyad left condoms outside my door, thrown eggs at my windows, Shoved some real SICK notes under my door, too sick to even repeat. So i got on to my local council & police ( several times) & to be honest they've done NOTHING to help sort my problems out.  Recently they came & fitted Strong Bolts to my door, then i actually felt SAFE in my own home. But today they dropped a bombshell on me by saying that the door they had added bolts to was a fire-door & they were gonna come and take them off. I have to say i was well & truly p*ssed off as this was the only thing stopping the tw@t from getting to my front door and to be told the bolts were coming off was a real kick in the teeth. Round here it seens like the rights of the abuser come before those of the victiim & that is not fair. The Council even offered me another place & i told them in no uncertain terms i was'nae moving  because they couldn't be bothered to move the Problem. I Have since been to a solicitor who's been a great help, & i've been advised that if this trouble carries on, that they can apply to the courts for an injunction/ Harassment order banning him from contacting or coming near me. I hope this does the trick becuase i'm not sure how much more i can take before i do summat i dont want to. One thing i DID hear was that this t*sser was wantin to move away, i just wish he would & i could suggest a place for him.....10 miles out to sea with pocketfuls of lead.     I'm feeling a tad happier now, but earlier today i could'nae stop cryin.
    May 20, 2011 2710
  • 28 Sep 2009
      Today is my second birthday, rebirthday of course. 2 years of being happy with my new body, which is no longer new, it’s just, my body. I gave myself a bit of a rebirthday present by flying to Germany last week to see my favourite musician of the last 25 years or so, Andreas Vollenweider. What a super trip. The flight from Manchester to Bremen was a doddle, found a cheap taxi company for transfer to the cheap hotel in Oldenburg, which was amazingly smart, and included a fantastic buffet breakfast, and a fridge on each landing with free bottled drinks - water, soft drinks, and beeeeer. Amazingly good value, and I took good advantage of the all you can eat breakfast, and the all you can drink fridges. Also had a good shop in Oldenburg, found a sexy skirt and a snazzy, chic cardie/top. But the gig, the reason I was there, was astounding, Wondrous, beautiful music, played by extremely talented musicians, especially Andreas himself. Having loved his music for so long, but only ever seen still photo’s of him, to actually see him play was amazing. The man is an absolute genius, a master of the many instruments he can play. His "electro-acoustic modified pedal harp" has just the most gorgeous sound. To hear it on big speakers in a concert hall, and to see his skill and deftness as his hands glide gracefully over the strings was a joy, nothing short of heavenly. Words cannot describe how good it was to see him, I’m still reeling, still buzzing. It was amazing. A real treat. I am so happy, so inspired, and so filled with awe. Wow. Here's an old clip on youtube, for anyone who's interested in furthering their musical tastes: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2XOdKG9Z_Xw&NR=1 xx
    2708 Posted by Lucy Diamond
  •   Today is my second birthday, rebirthday of course. 2 years of being happy with my new body, which is no longer new, it’s just, my body. I gave myself a bit of a rebirthday present by flying to Germany last week to see my favourite musician of the last 25 years or so, Andreas Vollenweider. What a super trip. The flight from Manchester to Bremen was a doddle, found a cheap taxi company for transfer to the cheap hotel in Oldenburg, which was amazingly smart, and included a fantastic buffet breakfast, and a fridge on each landing with free bottled drinks - water, soft drinks, and beeeeer. Amazingly good value, and I took good advantage of the all you can eat breakfast, and the all you can drink fridges. Also had a good shop in Oldenburg, found a sexy skirt and a snazzy, chic cardie/top. But the gig, the reason I was there, was astounding, Wondrous, beautiful music, played by extremely talented musicians, especially Andreas himself. Having loved his music for so long, but only ever seen still photo’s of him, to actually see him play was amazing. The man is an absolute genius, a master of the many instruments he can play. His "electro-acoustic modified pedal harp" has just the most gorgeous sound. To hear it on big speakers in a concert hall, and to see his skill and deftness as his hands glide gracefully over the strings was a joy, nothing short of heavenly. Words cannot describe how good it was to see him, I’m still reeling, still buzzing. It was amazing. A real treat. I am so happy, so inspired, and so filled with awe. Wow. Here's an old clip on youtube, for anyone who's interested in furthering their musical tastes: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2XOdKG9Z_Xw&NR=1 xx
    Sep 28, 2009 2708
  • 06 May 2011
    As I sit here this morning I feel a bit down that I can't be me. I'm supposed to meet some people for breakfast this morning & have to do it in male mode, which sucks. I finely got my nailpolish on right, not a dab out of place & an awsome color. But it has to come off. The reality is that I can never really go out as Karen. All the clothes & makeup on earth couldn't make me look right. After all the operations I had in 06 I have a huge gut with a scar as big as the palm of my hand right in the middle of it. Evan with out that at 52 it seems to late to start. If I would have had internet 30yrs ago I would have not felt so alone & so afraid to be the girl I want so badly to be.  I'm still alone. The net & being here at GS is not a real substitute for real friends.  Don't get me wrong I've met some real great ladies here. But my laptop can't hold a hand or wipe a tear. So I'll just keep feeling sad & go on with life as it is.
    2699 Posted by Karen Brad
  • As I sit here this morning I feel a bit down that I can't be me. I'm supposed to meet some people for breakfast this morning & have to do it in male mode, which sucks. I finely got my nailpolish on right, not a dab out of place & an awsome color. But it has to come off. The reality is that I can never really go out as Karen. All the clothes & makeup on earth couldn't make me look right. After all the operations I had in 06 I have a huge gut with a scar as big as the palm of my hand right in the middle of it. Evan with out that at 52 it seems to late to start. If I would have had internet 30yrs ago I would have not felt so alone & so afraid to be the girl I want so badly to be.  I'm still alone. The net & being here at GS is not a real substitute for real friends.  Don't get me wrong I've met some real great ladies here. But my laptop can't hold a hand or wipe a tear. So I'll just keep feeling sad & go on with life as it is.
    May 06, 2011 2699
  • 14 Mar 2015
    Hi. I'm post purge, pre-shop. Tick-tock, tick-tock. During an intensive period of gender anxiety in September of last year I found the courage - or lost the battle, and contacted a Therapist with the intention to commence a conversation. Having never participated in therapy previously I couched my language with words like conversation instead of therapy, and resultantly the person I contacted felt she was unable to help me. That indeed, 'It might be dangerous for me'. So I looked up Harley Street clinicians who would provide pricely qualification and get me out of my shell, but then of course I didn't book. I know what I am. I don't think I need inflated rate qualifications to tell me the truth, but I do need guidance and listening patient ears, and probably a shoulder to cry upon. I need a moment to scream and release everything inside. I want to feel what it is like to let it out, to relinquish this f**cked up os-so British conservative reserve and experience a pulse, and in a heartbeat to feel an essential nourishment that is unequivocal, entirely necessary, absolutely natural. I'm post purge, pre-shop. Tick-tock, tick-tock. So I am lying awake and lying asleep. I am dreaming of reincarnation, and daydreaming of a facsimile, of how I will walk, talk and present and of the clothes that I will wear as I start again. I glance at fashion pages of web-sites of wonder, and stores that sell beauty or at least an illusion. I am growing my hair but do not dare and so also I am researching new wigs and wondering about the discretion of packaging. Purchasing hair-pieces for 'Fancy dress parties or invites to Hen-Nights' are lame previous excuses, so perhaps I'll just march in, stay upright and ask, 'Inverted Bob. Blonde. For a joke bloke'. Rubbish Bins are expensive I am now thinking.. I'm post purge, pre-shop. Tick-tock, tick-tock. What I need to do - as I scan the family diaries, is to arrange an opportunity to take the dressing up and away. To move from the nocturnal internal catwalk between bathroom and bedroom and open the door. I need to go out, to be with, to talk to and engage with. Any takers? Anybody happy to receive a dishevelled friendly person in drab, with time on their hands whilst she tinkers and nervously gets herself ready? Anybody happy to clutch a bag that has never been opened, and hold her steady as she  reels from the enormity of walking in heels further than a corridor whilst challenged by environmental challenges such as wind, steps and staring eyes? Anybody happy to turn a blind ear to quavering octaves of little rehearsed pronunication, of puppetry body language and comical impersonation. Anybody up for a night with a person that's spent 46 years being another person? I'm post purge, pre-shop. Tick-tock, tick-tock. I've got dates lined up for the above, real ones. I know when I could do this, I'm even thinking of giving up alcohol, tuning my diet drinking more water in advance so that my skin is clearer. I'm looking at shoes (tricky the transition between boots and sandles) and I'm releasing that I've lost touch with whatever current fashion might currently be. I've got shortlists of who I would contact and even people here that I think might want to support my wandering that weekend. I actually (irrespective of what you have just read) think this will be fun, sweet, lovely and enlightening. I'm post purge, pre-shop. Tick-tock, tick-tock. There's a lot to do know. I need a plan, I need a list, I need support. I'm really, really sorry that I visit here often but invariably very fleetingly. I do not have the time with a hectic professional life for my family at present, let alone with my familiar self. If you see me pop up and then never contribute, I'm sorry. I'm not a voyeur watching you, the visits here are actually Gender Society watching over me. And I'm OK, thanks. I'm post purge, pre-shop. Tick-tock, tick-tock. I like writing. I like writing as Rachel and I wonder whether I have a book in me. My non-de-plume is of course my real name, but that's revealed in a chapter than nobody has read yet. I'm post purge, pre-shop. Tick-tock, tick-tock. Time's up. Rachel x    
    2649 Posted by Rachel de Blanc
  • Hi. I'm post purge, pre-shop. Tick-tock, tick-tock. During an intensive period of gender anxiety in September of last year I found the courage - or lost the battle, and contacted a Therapist with the intention to commence a conversation. Having never participated in therapy previously I couched my language with words like conversation instead of therapy, and resultantly the person I contacted felt she was unable to help me. That indeed, 'It might be dangerous for me'. So I looked up Harley Street clinicians who would provide pricely qualification and get me out of my shell, but then of course I didn't book. I know what I am. I don't think I need inflated rate qualifications to tell me the truth, but I do need guidance and listening patient ears, and probably a shoulder to cry upon. I need a moment to scream and release everything inside. I want to feel what it is like to let it out, to relinquish this f**cked up os-so British conservative reserve and experience a pulse, and in a heartbeat to feel an essential nourishment that is unequivocal, entirely necessary, absolutely natural. I'm post purge, pre-shop. Tick-tock, tick-tock. So I am lying awake and lying asleep. I am dreaming of reincarnation, and daydreaming of a facsimile, of how I will walk, talk and present and of the clothes that I will wear as I start again. I glance at fashion pages of web-sites of wonder, and stores that sell beauty or at least an illusion. I am growing my hair but do not dare and so also I am researching new wigs and wondering about the discretion of packaging. Purchasing hair-pieces for 'Fancy dress parties or invites to Hen-Nights' are lame previous excuses, so perhaps I'll just march in, stay upright and ask, 'Inverted Bob. Blonde. For a joke bloke'. Rubbish Bins are expensive I am now thinking.. I'm post purge, pre-shop. Tick-tock, tick-tock. What I need to do - as I scan the family diaries, is to arrange an opportunity to take the dressing up and away. To move from the nocturnal internal catwalk between bathroom and bedroom and open the door. I need to go out, to be with, to talk to and engage with. Any takers? Anybody happy to receive a dishevelled friendly person in drab, with time on their hands whilst she tinkers and nervously gets herself ready? Anybody happy to clutch a bag that has never been opened, and hold her steady as she  reels from the enormity of walking in heels further than a corridor whilst challenged by environmental challenges such as wind, steps and staring eyes? Anybody happy to turn a blind ear to quavering octaves of little rehearsed pronunication, of puppetry body language and comical impersonation. Anybody up for a night with a person that's spent 46 years being another person? I'm post purge, pre-shop. Tick-tock, tick-tock. I've got dates lined up for the above, real ones. I know when I could do this, I'm even thinking of giving up alcohol, tuning my diet drinking more water in advance so that my skin is clearer. I'm looking at shoes (tricky the transition between boots and sandles) and I'm releasing that I've lost touch with whatever current fashion might currently be. I've got shortlists of who I would contact and even people here that I think might want to support my wandering that weekend. I actually (irrespective of what you have just read) think this will be fun, sweet, lovely and enlightening. I'm post purge, pre-shop. Tick-tock, tick-tock. There's a lot to do know. I need a plan, I need a list, I need support. I'm really, really sorry that I visit here often but invariably very fleetingly. I do not have the time with a hectic professional life for my family at present, let alone with my familiar self. If you see me pop up and then never contribute, I'm sorry. I'm not a voyeur watching you, the visits here are actually Gender Society watching over me. And I'm OK, thanks. I'm post purge, pre-shop. Tick-tock, tick-tock. I like writing. I like writing as Rachel and I wonder whether I have a book in me. My non-de-plume is of course my real name, but that's revealed in a chapter than nobody has read yet. I'm post purge, pre-shop. Tick-tock, tick-tock. Time's up. Rachel x    
    Mar 14, 2015 2649
  • 22 Apr 2011
    Spring is finely coming to Michigan. Though I am getting tired of cold weather I like that I can wear nice tops with a bra & forms under a jacket without anyone knowing while I run erronds.   Have been looking into local groups for help in trying to look nicer when I dress evan if it is only at home. Mostly makeup. My body may never say woman but I think my face can look the part. With some help that is.   Cleaning out the closets. Moving all clothes that look like a guy could wear them to the back room. My bedroom will scream WOMAN!!!   Feeling good right now so I think I will end this here.
    2647 Posted by Karen Brad
  • Spring is finely coming to Michigan. Though I am getting tired of cold weather I like that I can wear nice tops with a bra & forms under a jacket without anyone knowing while I run erronds.   Have been looking into local groups for help in trying to look nicer when I dress evan if it is only at home. Mostly makeup. My body may never say woman but I think my face can look the part. With some help that is.   Cleaning out the closets. Moving all clothes that look like a guy could wear them to the back room. My bedroom will scream WOMAN!!!   Feeling good right now so I think I will end this here.
    Apr 22, 2011 2647
  • 05 Apr 2011
    Hooray!  We've finally done it and I'm soooo pleased!!! Our new community site is online at last.  It was a bit shaky to start with and we had a short time when the site got so slow it nearly crashed altogether, but we fixed that and it's quite speedy now.  We'll work on making it even faster in the coming days and weeks and we'll also fix the remaining bugs.  Don't forget to let me know if you find any. Now, we need to start a full membership drive to help pay for all this. If you haven't already done so, please do play with all the toys.  They are all there for you after all. Upload you best photos to Hot or Not, ask a TG related question in Q&A, use the forums, start a blog here, check out our awesome TG News pages which are constantly updated.  Make new friends in the chat rooms, watch some videos, read Frock Magazine or one of our full member's books.  Maybe have a virtual makeover or check out thousands of photos in our hundreds of photo galleries.  There's so much to see and do here and it's all for you. I so hope you enjoy the little world we've created for. Hugs, Katie   x
    2642 Posted by Katie Glover
  • Hooray!  We've finally done it and I'm soooo pleased!!! Our new community site is online at last.  It was a bit shaky to start with and we had a short time when the site got so slow it nearly crashed altogether, but we fixed that and it's quite speedy now.  We'll work on making it even faster in the coming days and weeks and we'll also fix the remaining bugs.  Don't forget to let me know if you find any. Now, we need to start a full membership drive to help pay for all this. If you haven't already done so, please do play with all the toys.  They are all there for you after all. Upload you best photos to Hot or Not, ask a TG related question in Q&A, use the forums, start a blog here, check out our awesome TG News pages which are constantly updated.  Make new friends in the chat rooms, watch some videos, read Frock Magazine or one of our full member's books.  Maybe have a virtual makeover or check out thousands of photos in our hundreds of photo galleries.  There's so much to see and do here and it's all for you. I so hope you enjoy the little world we've created for. Hugs, Katie   x
    Apr 05, 2011 2642
  • 22 Mar 2011
    I sometimes wonder why I bother at all.  Every time I've said we are just a day or two away from making this site live, I have been scuppered by one huge problem or another.   It seemed like we were all set to go a few weeks back and I told everyone to say goodbye to the old site once and for all.  Then we discovered a huge problem in the membership system which would not allow anyone to log in unless they had a valid subscription.   I protested to the developers and said that the vast majority of our members are on our free membership level and we can't force them to start subscriptions.  I was told I would have to create a new subscription for $0.00 and get the programmers to automatically assign all Basic members to it, just so they could log in.   That job is still ongoing as I speak.  And so, it is now almost April and we are still on the starting blocks.  You have no idea how upset I am about this and about the sheer amount of time it's taken to get this far.   Many times over the last few months, I have thought seriously about just walking away from this altogether instead of throwing good money after bad - money we just can't afford.   Maybe I should just concentrate on Frock Magazine and leave it at that.  Perhaps that's what the gods want me to do.   Or maybe I should just give up altogether and get a job on the bins.   Glum Katie   :(
    2642 Posted by Katie Glover
  • I sometimes wonder why I bother at all.  Every time I've said we are just a day or two away from making this site live, I have been scuppered by one huge problem or another.   It seemed like we were all set to go a few weeks back and I told everyone to say goodbye to the old site once and for all.  Then we discovered a huge problem in the membership system which would not allow anyone to log in unless they had a valid subscription.   I protested to the developers and said that the vast majority of our members are on our free membership level and we can't force them to start subscriptions.  I was told I would have to create a new subscription for $0.00 and get the programmers to automatically assign all Basic members to it, just so they could log in.   That job is still ongoing as I speak.  And so, it is now almost April and we are still on the starting blocks.  You have no idea how upset I am about this and about the sheer amount of time it's taken to get this far.   Many times over the last few months, I have thought seriously about just walking away from this altogether instead of throwing good money after bad - money we just can't afford.   Maybe I should just concentrate on Frock Magazine and leave it at that.  Perhaps that's what the gods want me to do.   Or maybe I should just give up altogether and get a job on the bins.   Glum Katie   :(
    Mar 22, 2011 2642
  • 01 Aug 2012
    Truthfully I can say that being transgendered isn't an easy path.  There is so much fear that has crippled me over the years.  Denial has also played a huge factor in my life as well.  I don't want to be a transsexual woman or any other type of gender variant individual.  Yes I said that because if things had worked out like they should have I would have been born as a girl and that would be the end of the story.  Living a life in fear of being discovered isn't for me.  I don't want to hide anymore and I want to be honest to others about who I really am and how I feel.  That doesn't mean I will tell everyone and wave my little TG flag around because I believe in discretion as well.  What I suppose it means for myself is I have finally come to accept myself as being a transgendered person.  This has been a very long time coming but I can really say I am OK with it.  The tricky part is where do I go from here?   If we live long enough I suppose we can all get here.  Years of frustration and anger and self loathing, praying, bargaining, fighting, wondering... I am still here and so are my gender issues.  I am in my forties facing the prospect of transitioning.  For those of you who are younger please listen to what your inner voice tells you about yourself.  Get counseling and help early.  You deserve it and owe it to yourself to be honest about your feelings.  Find somebody to talk to now don't wait until tomorrow even.  If you are a girl who feels she should be a boy then don't ignore those feelings.  If you are a guy who is ashamed that he dresses in women's clothing you need to find out why you are doing these things.  If you are saddened by the fact that you have a penis and won't grow breasts like other girls you need help.  Don't try to suffer through or be a false martyr because you will regret it later.  If you are transgendered you need support from people who can accept that about you and can help you to make YOUR OWN decisions about what you can do about it.  Don't blame anyone else for your situation face it and deal with it and own it.    Hi I'm Karen a 44 year old transgendered person.  I am a human being and I am learning to be better to myself.  Don't ever stop trying, do what you can.  Love yourself even if you think you don't deserve it.  Be kind and finally smile.  Yes you reader smile until you feel it inside.  You can't change the world or other people but you can change your mind.  You can change you.     Karen
    2572 Posted by Kari Johnson
  • Truthfully I can say that being transgendered isn't an easy path.  There is so much fear that has crippled me over the years.  Denial has also played a huge factor in my life as well.  I don't want to be a transsexual woman or any other type of gender variant individual.  Yes I said that because if things had worked out like they should have I would have been born as a girl and that would be the end of the story.  Living a life in fear of being discovered isn't for me.  I don't want to hide anymore and I want to be honest to others about who I really am and how I feel.  That doesn't mean I will tell everyone and wave my little TG flag around because I believe in discretion as well.  What I suppose it means for myself is I have finally come to accept myself as being a transgendered person.  This has been a very long time coming but I can really say I am OK with it.  The tricky part is where do I go from here?   If we live long enough I suppose we can all get here.  Years of frustration and anger and self loathing, praying, bargaining, fighting, wondering... I am still here and so are my gender issues.  I am in my forties facing the prospect of transitioning.  For those of you who are younger please listen to what your inner voice tells you about yourself.  Get counseling and help early.  You deserve it and owe it to yourself to be honest about your feelings.  Find somebody to talk to now don't wait until tomorrow even.  If you are a girl who feels she should be a boy then don't ignore those feelings.  If you are a guy who is ashamed that he dresses in women's clothing you need to find out why you are doing these things.  If you are saddened by the fact that you have a penis and won't grow breasts like other girls you need help.  Don't try to suffer through or be a false martyr because you will regret it later.  If you are transgendered you need support from people who can accept that about you and can help you to make YOUR OWN decisions about what you can do about it.  Don't blame anyone else for your situation face it and deal with it and own it.    Hi I'm Karen a 44 year old transgendered person.  I am a human being and I am learning to be better to myself.  Don't ever stop trying, do what you can.  Love yourself even if you think you don't deserve it.  Be kind and finally smile.  Yes you reader smile until you feel it inside.  You can't change the world or other people but you can change your mind.  You can change you.     Karen
    Aug 01, 2012 2572
  • 03 Dec 2015
    This blog takes into consideration a) that all textbooks and similar publications on any scientific or medical matter are generally 'out-of'date' at the point of printing b) that I am a Registered Medical Practitioner c) my Pychiatric training was at an under-graduate level d) that bias is introduced to this blog, as a result of self-interest. I am a Transsexual ( Gender Dysohoria, historically described as 'Gender Identity Disorder 0, and have been professionally fully assessed and given the WHO ICD code of F64.0.I will dwell on this group no further. Transgender: This group, and the above sub-division, embrace individuals who assign themselves to the cross-dressing group. I do not propose to dwell on either, but would be plesased to elaborate on my personal views in the future.  In our Trans Groups are a whole spectrum of members, often confused as to which 'box' assigned by a 'well-meaning' Society to jump in to. This 'need' is irrelevant, as we are all 'cast adrift', by the same 'caring Society' in a rowing boat with just a sextant for help. As a senior member of the two groups, I am asked to help, on occasions. My working module is fluid, adaptable in light of new evidence, personal to me: and, open to consructive critisism.For those interested, here it is, naked as the day it was born with all defects, scars and blemishes visible and open to scrutiny: DRAG Individuals: Mainly males having 'a bit of fun' Exaggerated female features make-up and dress a) Queens/Kings b)Pantomine (Travesti) Dames (single sex entertainment groups) c) Faux Queens, females imitating drag queens. CROSS-DRESSER: Not a psychological problem unless it interferes with relationships/work etc. The term implies no specific cause for this behaviour. Accoutrements/clothes are generally associated with the opposite sex in any given society. A) Comfort b) Self expression/actualisation c) Disguise:1/ entertainment plot device 2/ Women wanting employment in men-only occupations 3/ Males escaping military service, Police etc. 4/ Protest (Political or Social) in support of a majority group from the opposite sex (eg. Rebecca Riots). Genderfuck: Males in female attire with noticeable male features, such as a Father Xmas beard. TRANSVESTITISM or TRANSVESTISM (also see cross-dressing, above): Participants may be Hetero-sexual, Gay, Lesbian, Bi-gender or Asexual. this term is often associated, by the professionals who originally ( unwisely in my opinion ) defined it, with sexual arousal on donning the relevant garments. This loose and ill-defined term is considered highly derogatory by any person whose self (or professional) appraisal is that they have Transgender status. BIGENDER/DUAL GENDER: A high incidence of Bipolar-disorder (9 of 32 in one study) and Ambidextrous nature have been stated. Individuals find the switch is involuntary, in the main; and, occurs frequently when they conciously prefer to be in the other gender/ behaviour pattern.Some identify 2 or more distinct male and female personas, or 2 genders simultaneously.Studies indicate that this is rare in the Gender community (less than 3% males and 8% females: 1999 study from the Health Dept., San Francisco)). GENDER FLUIDITY:Individuals appear generally not to have the 'switch mechanism' of the Bigender group: experiencing an entire range or spectrum of gender identity without jumping in and out of fixed gender identities; and this takes place over an extended period. TRANSVESTIC FETISHISM ( A DIAGNOSTIC "PARAPHILIA"): this is the only Gender Variant presently defined by the APA as a Psychiatric Disorder; and, with this current label, you don't want or need this diagnosis. DSM-IV defined this condition as ocurring only in hetero-sexual males: DSM-V defines it as ocurring in both males and females of any sexual persuasion. Individuals have no problem with their assigned gender. They suffer a) Homovestism ( sexual arousal on donning a sex-typical garment), and b) significant and demonstrable impairment/distress of personal, social and/or occupational interaction, merely as a result of compulsive cross-dressing. if these two criteria are met, a diagnosis is confirmed. Behavioural characteristics ( not exclusive to this group, thankfully, and from personal experience )can include: a) the accumulation of sex-typical garments ( shoes and boots, panty-hose, stockings, lingerie ( including brassieres and slips), night attire, bridal gowns and 'baby-doll' attire. b) dressing in individual items, c) the use of dressing-agencies to source/provide the above items, and appropriate/relevant photography. d) The accumulation of a 'portfolio' of appropriate images for personal gratification ( acting out fantasies ) and subsequent internet distribution. Well that's me neatly summed up in a single paragraph: however, please promise not to tell Charing X GIC! KEY words: APA Americann Psychiatric Association: WHO World Health Organisation ICD International Statistical Classification of Disease and associated Disorders. Harriet: MD ChB (VU) LRCP MRCS FCOphth MRCP(UK) FRCS (Eng) FRCOphth FRCSEd Emeritus Professor of Oculo-plastic, Facial-feminisation and Orbital Surgery SUMMARY: I hope that this, my personal voyage around a constantly changing sea, is of some little help to other members, to enlighten and stimulate further comment, study and research. My life-boat has finally beached off a lovely south facing beach of an idyllic 'tropical island' amongst a lovely Transgender community. Where the Cannibals allegedly live over the far side of the unclimbable mountains on the north coast, and are apparantly incapable of building boats (I hope).   
  • This blog takes into consideration a) that all textbooks and similar publications on any scientific or medical matter are generally 'out-of'date' at the point of printing b) that I am a Registered Medical Practitioner c) my Pychiatric training was at an under-graduate level d) that bias is introduced to this blog, as a result of self-interest. I am a Transsexual ( Gender Dysohoria, historically described as 'Gender Identity Disorder 0, and have been professionally fully assessed and given the WHO ICD code of F64.0.I will dwell on this group no further. Transgender: This group, and the above sub-division, embrace individuals who assign themselves to the cross-dressing group. I do not propose to dwell on either, but would be plesased to elaborate on my personal views in the future.  In our Trans Groups are a whole spectrum of members, often confused as to which 'box' assigned by a 'well-meaning' Society to jump in to. This 'need' is irrelevant, as we are all 'cast adrift', by the same 'caring Society' in a rowing boat with just a sextant for help. As a senior member of the two groups, I am asked to help, on occasions. My working module is fluid, adaptable in light of new evidence, personal to me: and, open to consructive critisism.For those interested, here it is, naked as the day it was born with all defects, scars and blemishes visible and open to scrutiny: DRAG Individuals: Mainly males having 'a bit of fun' Exaggerated female features make-up and dress a) Queens/Kings b)Pantomine (Travesti) Dames (single sex entertainment groups) c) Faux Queens, females imitating drag queens. CROSS-DRESSER: Not a psychological problem unless it interferes with relationships/work etc. The term implies no specific cause for this behaviour. Accoutrements/clothes are generally associated with the opposite sex in any given society. A) Comfort b) Self expression/actualisation c) Disguise:1/ entertainment plot device 2/ Women wanting employment in men-only occupations 3/ Males escaping military service, Police etc. 4/ Protest (Political or Social) in support of a majority group from the opposite sex (eg. Rebecca Riots). Genderfuck: Males in female attire with noticeable male features, such as a Father Xmas beard. TRANSVESTITISM or TRANSVESTISM (also see cross-dressing, above): Participants may be Hetero-sexual, Gay, Lesbian, Bi-gender or Asexual. this term is often associated, by the professionals who originally ( unwisely in my opinion ) defined it, with sexual arousal on donning the relevant garments. This loose and ill-defined term is considered highly derogatory by any person whose self (or professional) appraisal is that they have Transgender status. BIGENDER/DUAL GENDER: A high incidence of Bipolar-disorder (9 of 32 in one study) and Ambidextrous nature have been stated. Individuals find the switch is involuntary, in the main; and, occurs frequently when they conciously prefer to be in the other gender/ behaviour pattern.Some identify 2 or more distinct male and female personas, or 2 genders simultaneously.Studies indicate that this is rare in the Gender community (less than 3% males and 8% females: 1999 study from the Health Dept., San Francisco)). GENDER FLUIDITY:Individuals appear generally not to have the 'switch mechanism' of the Bigender group: experiencing an entire range or spectrum of gender identity without jumping in and out of fixed gender identities; and this takes place over an extended period. TRANSVESTIC FETISHISM ( A DIAGNOSTIC "PARAPHILIA"): this is the only Gender Variant presently defined by the APA as a Psychiatric Disorder; and, with this current label, you don't want or need this diagnosis. DSM-IV defined this condition as ocurring only in hetero-sexual males: DSM-V defines it as ocurring in both males and females of any sexual persuasion. Individuals have no problem with their assigned gender. They suffer a) Homovestism ( sexual arousal on donning a sex-typical garment), and b) significant and demonstrable impairment/distress of personal, social and/or occupational interaction, merely as a result of compulsive cross-dressing. if these two criteria are met, a diagnosis is confirmed. Behavioural characteristics ( not exclusive to this group, thankfully, and from personal experience )can include: a) the accumulation of sex-typical garments ( shoes and boots, panty-hose, stockings, lingerie ( including brassieres and slips), night attire, bridal gowns and 'baby-doll' attire. b) dressing in individual items, c) the use of dressing-agencies to source/provide the above items, and appropriate/relevant photography. d) The accumulation of a 'portfolio' of appropriate images for personal gratification ( acting out fantasies ) and subsequent internet distribution. Well that's me neatly summed up in a single paragraph: however, please promise not to tell Charing X GIC! KEY words: APA Americann Psychiatric Association: WHO World Health Organisation ICD International Statistical Classification of Disease and associated Disorders. Harriet: MD ChB (VU) LRCP MRCS FCOphth MRCP(UK) FRCS (Eng) FRCOphth FRCSEd Emeritus Professor of Oculo-plastic, Facial-feminisation and Orbital Surgery SUMMARY: I hope that this, my personal voyage around a constantly changing sea, is of some little help to other members, to enlighten and stimulate further comment, study and research. My life-boat has finally beached off a lovely south facing beach of an idyllic 'tropical island' amongst a lovely Transgender community. Where the Cannibals allegedly live over the far side of the unclimbable mountains on the north coast, and are apparantly incapable of building boats (I hope).   
    Dec 03, 2015 2570