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    • July 6, 2014 4:07 PM BST
    • It's a great topic and one that can be discussed from so many different angles.  But in our lifetimes, we have seen the emergence of women from the shadows of society to the point where they are equal or even supperior to men in many facets.  I've embraced this spirit and refuse to be seen or treated as a second class citizen.  Doesn't always work, but I do always hold my head high...

      Keep on moving forward...develop confidence in yourself as a human, and most of all, learn to love yourself.  The rest will fall into place!

      Best wishes always!

      Traci xoxo

    • July 6, 2014 9:37 AM BST
    • Thanks Tracy your absolutely right of course, personally i must learn to be more assertive. Part of my problem is i am passive and non confrontational by nature. The other side that interests me though is the psychological side of the game. How much is social conditioning, how much is natural male dominance and how do we fit in as trans gendered. Transfeminism is interesting and tries to understand where we are coming from. Whilst we clearly seem to fit under the umbrella of feminism we are not biologically female and have experienced male conditioning to some extent or have we? What does this say about a patriarchal or matriarchal society. Just wanted to discuss i guess. Thanks again for your love and concern. Its what i love about this house and why i am here. A special sistership. X

    • July 6, 2014 9:12 AM BST
    • With all the 'blonde' jokes around, there must be some truth in them, surely?  But why are they all about blonde women

    • July 6, 2014 4:41 AM BST
    •  It only happens that way if you allow them to treat you in that manner! For me, if they do not have the proper social skills and treat us as equals, they are gone from my life...I'm a girl on a mission in life and will not lower myself in order to have a man. Set your standards high girl and you'll get the type of person you're looking for!
      xoxo  

    • July 6, 2014 1:11 AM BST
    • Giggling. Yes well sex and cooking could be likened. Well! Spent a while reading up on transfeminism. Wow what a hot potato in the pure feminist field of thought. Hadn't heard of it. Deserves debate having just skimmed the surface. Lots of issues.

    • July 6, 2014 1:10 AM BST
    • Giggling. Yes well sex and cooking could be likened. Well! Spent a while reading up on transfeminism. Wow what a hot potato in the pure feminist field of thought. Hadn't heard of it. Deserves debate having just skimmed the surface. Lots of issues.

    • July 6, 2014 12:38 AM BST
    • Cooking, cleaning and the other thing...
      Now if I could be bothered with the cleaning I'd make someone the perfect wife!
      xx

    • July 6, 2014 12:22 AM BST
    • Hi Lucy, you are so in tune with me on this. It's sometimes very condescending but they dont seem to have any insight. To be fair guy's are generally cool its just sometimes it comes out. I was recently with a guy for a while and he was the king. He took over my conversations, he took control from me all the time. He was just a cntrol freak and i was left feeling useless. My job in that relationship was cookin cleaning and the other thing. Fortunately i was able to escape. Ah well i have moved on. X

    • July 5, 2014 11:26 PM BST
    • It's a great question Chantel, and I hope others will post their experiences here.
      I play in a band with 4 guys, work around the pub scene quite a lot. I come into contact with plenty of beer-swilling old-school sort of guys, generally most of them are charming, sometimes I'm not sure if they realise how patronising they are, on occasions, towards women!
      Sometimes I get light-hearted banter - battle of the sexes sort of thing, and I love that, I mean, bring it on, right?! But sometimes I'm like, can you hear yourself right now..?
      xx

    • July 5, 2014 11:18 PM BST
    • Thanks Lucy, your much better than me at describing it. But thats exactly right. Thamkyou. X

    • July 5, 2014 10:56 PM BST
    • I've found this to be an interesting and quite surprising subtlety of my integration as a woman. I've experienced little bits of chauvinism here and there, not malicious, just enough to make me aware of the "social norm" of some men's general behaviour towards women. I've felt sometimes like I've needed to bite my tongue, whilst at the same time realising that from a TS's point of view, if I'm being treated chauvinistically I am therefore being accepted as a woman in their eyes.
      It's a different thing to facing prejudice as a TS, it's how those men treat any other woman, but again I feel sure they don't do it ignorantly, it's really just their social conditioning.
      It's definitely less bitter than bittersweet, definitely a back-handed compliment, and has made me see feminist issues from a different viewpoint, and probably made me behave in a somewhat more feminist way. I stand up for myself more now; I won't be downtrodden!
      xx

    • July 5, 2014 10:04 PM BST
    • Male chauvinism. My personal experience as a transgendered man has been at times quite frustrating, thought provoking and sometimes demeaning when out dressed. I find I am treated quite differently. Men pull out a chair, open doors which can be very pleasant but then I get treated like a blonde bimbo, I get talked over or my contribution to conversation treated with deference to greater male knowledge. I am therefore left to or expected to join the girls if there are any, if not I am either excluded to some lesser or greater extent or if I am fortunate chatted up.  This experience lends me to greater understanding of the feminist point of view.  I therefore take it as a back handed compliment in that I think I am being treated as I perceive a biological female.  Does anyone else experience the same? Sorry if I haven't put this together very well.

    • July 5, 2014 11:13 PM BST
    • Moderator, please delete this thread as it has been duplicated. I've just posted the first response in the other version!
      Thanks.
      xx

    • July 5, 2014 10:01 PM BST
    • Male chauvinism. My personal experience as a transgendered man has been at times quite frustrating, thought provoking and sometimes demeaning when out dressed. I find I am treated quite differently. Men pull out a chair, open doors which can be very pleasant but then I get treated like a blonde bimbo, I get talked over or my contribution to conversation treated with deference to greater male knowledge. I am therefore left to or expected to join the girls if there are any, if not I am either excluded to some lesser or greater extent or if I am fortunate chatted up.  This experience lends me to greater understanding of the feminist point of view.  I therefore take it as a back handed compliment in that I think I am being treated as I perceive a biological female.  Does anyone else experience the same?

    • June 22, 2014 3:55 AM BST
    • You  are right Nikki, it was nothing. i think i may have already blogged this but one guy at the yard asked me out to dinner!

      -Robin

    • May 17, 2014 3:33 PM BST
    • What to do? Stop worrying about it, Robin. 

       

      He may still be trying to figure you out but so what. The 'ma'am' comment may have been deliberate to see how you would react but basically, you are probably being treated in the gender you are presenting, which he is assuming is female. He may be thinking, 'well, she's female now but was she always?' So he is looking at you 'kind of weird' to try and understand this. 

       

      My advise? Don't over analyse it and just carry on as normal, do your job and pick up the pay. 

    • May 9, 2014 12:00 AM BST
    • OK, so you know I quit my job at woodshop, and my friend Rich had a boat he didn't have time to finish so he gave it to me to finish, with owner's OK. So as I am working on the catboat, a guy asks if I would look at another boat that needs varnish stripped and sanded. Yeah, sure. So Robin heads over with "Phil" to check out this 40' sailboat and I gave him a price and the owner's said go ahead. Now we see one another frequently around this boat yard and i doin't know if he thinks i am a guy who just likes to dress/look like a woman. or if he believes that I am a woman. I have no idea!  So yesterday he asked me to look at yet another boat, a Nonsuch, weirdest looking sailboat ever, possibly (apologies to anyone who has one!). Anyway, we get to the ladder and "Phil" says, "after you, maam". So I think, "OK, that's settled" but later that day I was leaving to go to Boston, and I had changed into shorts and a "flowey" top, and freshened my makeup a little, and he looked at me kind of weird, lile he is thinking "...ok, I think you have taken this a little too far, Robin" What to do, what to do?? 

    • March 20, 2014 2:50 PM GMT
    • If I ever have makeup on, I am going to let someone else do it.  Might end up like a clown from a horror movie if I did it myself.

    • March 19, 2014 5:06 PM GMT
    • Well done Suzy.  Loved it.  My wife who is partially sighted, or partially blind, whatever you prefer, has real trouble seeing things most folk can see.  She - understandably - gets upset about that.  Tell me though, why is it if I have a run in my tights or lipstick on my collar ( I wish Wink) she can spot it at a hundred yards?

    • March 18, 2014 10:21 AM GMT
    • I found it on the website of Insight Radio, a British (Scottish based) radio station for us visually impaired/bloind people which sort of made me laugh in some places and nod knowingly in others.  Just thought I add my own humourous thoughts to it.

    • March 18, 2014 1:25 AM GMT
    • Interesting article. I knew all that because I was married to a blind person for 16 years (who has a big chip in her shoulder over it, but that's more due to her personality), but you shared in a witty way.

      Thanks!

    • March 15, 2014 10:37 AM GMT
    • There are some myths that surround the partially sighted and blind community.  Some of them are below and I have put my own little twists on them as well, so sit back and enjoy.
       
      1)   Don't worry about saying things like "Ok, see you later", "See you tomorrow", "Keep an eye out." or even "look out." and then suddenly look guilty.  These are
            just several everyday phrases and we won't be offended. Blind People can't see.  In fact 96% of people registered blind have some vision that can range from
            seeing light and dark to having enough vision to read a newspaper or even ride a bike.
       
      2)   Sitting to close to the television will harm your eyes Sorry, there's no evidence to suggest that sitting too close to a TV will damage your eyes. Sit where ever you
            are comfortable.  Phew, I was worried there for a second, as when I was a kid, I had to sit in front of the TV all the time until I was given a low visual aid (small
            telescope).
       
      3)   When addressing a blind person YOU NEED TO TALK LIKE THIS. They've got problems with their eyes, not their ears.  If you just want to say something back, I
            have 3 suggestions.  1) SORRY I DIDN'T REALISE YOU WERE DEAF, 2) Sorry I can't hear because there's an idiot shouting and my personal favourite, 3) Sorry I
            can't hear you, I am blind.
       
      4)   Blind people know everyone from the sound of their voice. Family, friends and workmates maybe, but how often do YOU recognise someone's voice on the
            phone?
       
      5)   A blind person's other senses will compensate for sight loss, so they'll develop things like super hearing.  The other senses don't compensate for sight loss.  You
            may pay more attention to what you're hearing, smelling, etc, but you don't get any bonus super powers.  I hate to watch films and TV programmes, where they
            have an episode with a blind person, who can smell a fart at a 1000 metres away, hear a pin drop a mile away and have a inbuilt GPS device that they can walk
            around anywhere without any help from people, guide dogs or any sticks, and their super powers disappear when the bad guy comes after them in their own
            home.  Oh, I know there actually blind people who click their fingers and/or tongues so sound bounces off solid objects, like buildings, walls and parked cars, etc.
            like a dolphin sonar but it's not a perfect way to move around and these people aren't like the Marvel hero Daredevil.
       
      6)   Here's one from America. Blind people, to maintain secrecy and security, staff the snack bars at the CIA A lot of blind people DO work within government buildings
            in America, but it has far more to do with a very successful employment drive, than national security.  The FBI had a deaf agent called Sue Thomas who was used
            to read lips on stakeouts and such like.  They even made a TV series called Sue Thomas FBEye.   Damm, I in the wrong job.  The name's Bond.....James Bond
            007 and 3 quarters.  So Mr Blowfelt, where are you......Hello......Anyone there.....Anyone.....
       
      7)   All blind people know Braille. Only around 1 in 10 registered blind people use Braille. Most cases of sight loss happen later in life, and, as you get older, the
            sensitivity of your fingertips is reduced.
       
      8)   Blind people feel other people's faces. “Hello, is it me you're looking for) Lionel Ritchie has a lot to answer for here. Other than maybe finding out if you have a
            beard or not, feeling your face gives absolutely no indication of what you look like.
       
      9)   All blind people have guide dogs. Only a tiny fraction of blind and partially sighted people have guide dogs. This is mainly because most blind and partially
            sighted people are elderly and simply can't walk, feed, and generally look after a healthy and lively animal. For those who do have guide dogs however, they are
            invaluable aids and companions.  Mind you, if you did have one, you just may get a free drink in the pub, LOL.
       
      9)   Blind People don't watch television. Over 90% of blind people regularly watch television, and, as is only fair, they get 50% off their TV licence in Britain.
       
      10) Guide Dogs can read signs and can see traffic lights. It's the guide dog owner who is in control, not the dog. With subtle commands through the harness, the
            guide dog owner is telling the dog to turn, cross the road or stop, although if a guide dog sees something such as a car coming, he knows not to obey until the
            danger has passed.  If your guide dog can read, then I wonder what kind of books they would read.
       
      11) Blind people can't do normal jobs. The days of basket weaving and piano tuning are no more. With a speaking computer, there are few jobs that a blind or
            partially sighted person cannot do. There are blind teachers, lawyers, social workers, computer programmers, painters, radio and TV presenters.  The problem with
            working in a shop is that it's the stupid customers who come in who are really blind.
       
      12) Blind people always need help. Sometimes maybe, but always ask first. Some would welcome a hand other's really don't need it.  Never grab someone and take
            charge.  No one likes to be grabbed or taken over.  My mum does nag but that's what they are there for.
       
      13) Can you get Playboy in Braille?  Yes you can, but there are no tactile pictures.  Damm, even I didn’t know this.  What’s the point of having a Playboy anyway if the
            articles are in Braille but no....erm....tactile pictures of the young ladies.  I would read the articles myself, LOL. You can get most books in Braille or audio. In fact,
            only 5% of books ever make it to an alternative format. So 95% of what you see in any bookshop will never be available to blind or partially sighted readers. 
            Since I have cataracts, which is stopping me reading my books, I have to get them on audiobooks and download them on my external hard drive or get them on
            discs.  It saves on space as well.
       
      14) Blind people make wonderful musicians. Nope. Musical talent is as evenly distributed through the blind and partially sighted community as it is in any other cross
            section of the population. Well, that's it, I won't be able to do Britain Has Talent or X Factor (Thank god).  I do know what the notes are on the white key on a
            piano and I wish I could learn how to play guitar.

    • November 7, 2013 2:37 PM GMT
    • Hello, Kayleigh.Welcome back,and welcome me to here,I am new here.

    • August 19, 2013 4:34 AM BST
    • Good morning at least to everybody else. I am not so certain about myself. Please let my explain why.

       

      I remember to have been stuck by a bea for a number of years ago and I remember to have written a tranny related poem about the incident. As a token of that I received a Tranny Web (which Gender Socitty used to be, for those who were not around back then) neckless. I am proud to say that the neckless is still in my position.

       

      This was the positive part of this post. Now comes the not so.

       

      I was stuck by a bea just for two hours ago without a tranny connection and it hurts. A bea sting is less than comfortable in any situation but it just happens that I suffered a nerve inflamation - or neuresia if you prefer - yesterday. Alas, I just cannot wait for the pharmacy to open to buy pain killers. Especially as the neuresia was in my heart area. I am grateful to the good doctor who explained me the difference between neuresia and a heart attack, not a bit less because he could not avoid to notice that I am a transvestite and did not mind as I answered positive to his question abou that.

       

      In other news, I lost my mother a couple of months ago and have not been well at all the last two or three weeks, even apart from the above mentioned neuresia and bea sting. Also, my present physical apperance would not allow me to call myself a transvestite, allthough I have been one all my life, e.g. 56 years.

       

      You may understand now that I wish everybody a better morning. And I am sure that mine will be better soon as well. Could not be much worse anyway but hey, who would want to give up?

       

    • August 15, 2013 11:59 AM BST
    • Ha ha! Can't we share the good weather?

    • August 14, 2013 3:30 PM BST
    • Yes, thank you Robin,lol. It was because I hadn't ridden it for a couple of weeks so took it out of the garage to run the engine. As it's hot I just had my daisy dukes on. Wheeling it back in, I just touched the side of the exhaust slightly but that's all it takes. 

       

      Donna, normally you will not be in contact with the exhaust but as I stated here, I wasn't actually riding it at the time, which makes it all the more ironic really. Tongue out

       

      As for the hot weather, it's mine and I'm keeping it! 

       

      Nikki

    • August 13, 2013 8:53 PM BST
    • Yes, I guess it would at that, best not to take any advise from me!

      Oh, and no need for a heat shield on motorcycle exhausts....you just don't touch it Niki! ; )

    • August 13, 2013 7:47 PM BST
    • Shouldn't motorbike exhausts be better protected? Bicycle chains are another thing... A pair of lightweight trousers should be comfy in hot weather. How come you're getting the hot weather anyway, it's quite cool here today.

    • August 13, 2013 5:56 PM BST
    • It isn't a good look Robin, It's a large burn about the size of the palm of your hand. It would have looked rather silly with a skirt and I'm far too vain for that! lol.

       

      Nikki

    • August 13, 2013 2:55 PM BST
    • I think a dressing (no, no pun!) on your calf doesn't sound too bad....

    • August 13, 2013 2:07 PM BST
    • Well, not sooo good as I burnt my calf quite badly on a motorcycle exhaust yesterday and because it has a dressing on it, I had to wear trousers to work today, and for the rest of the week I guess. Frown

       

      It's not that I mind wearing them, but the weather is just too warm! A skirt is much cooler on days like this. However, it's not a good look with a large bandage around my calf though. 

       

      Nikki 

       

       

       

    • August 8, 2013 1:02 PM BST
    • Welcome back Tina, your presence is greatly appreciated. xxXxx

    • August 8, 2013 5:05 AM BST
    • Good morning!

       

      Thank you all, my friends, and especially Katie, for being patient with me. I have quite a lot of talk about but it will not be so easy to talk. I specially appriciate that Katie was kind enough to allow me a presence here.Maybe I shall find back to honest talking with my old friends.

       

      Starting with the latter, I recently needed to look at my toenails. They have been red for a couple of months but the thought came to my mind that another colour could be usable.

       

      Alas, sisters, do any of you have ideas about the color? Black, blue, yellow or green?

    • July 13, 2013 8:57 PM BST
    • Welcome back, Nikki Smile

       

      Hugs,

       

      Judith

    • July 11, 2013 12:56 PM BST
    • Thank you Andi, it's nice to see that some familiar faces are still around. I hope you have been keeping well. 

    • July 5, 2013 9:21 PM BST
    • Welcome back nikki your right its been awhile,
      I don't get chance to be on here much now myself
      But it's great that you are back,

    • July 1, 2013 4:04 PM BST
    • I will just be pretty quiet I think Christine, very unlike me I know! It looks like you have been doing a fantastic job though, which will have been much appreciated by everyone here. 

    • June 29, 2013 8:46 PM BST
    • Welcome Back Nikki, looking forward to chatting again and your input. Smile

    • June 29, 2013 4:08 PM BST
    • Welcome home Nikki, I am one of the ones who joined after you went "on holiday" -- I'm not quite sure how it happened but I have ended up as moderator and news editor, lol. anyhow I'm looking forward to meeting up with you in the mad house (otherwise known as the chat room)

      Hugs

      Rosie

    • June 29, 2013 12:46 PM BST
    • I would just like to say 'hello' to everyone on here, some of you will perhaps remember me, to many of you I will be new. Either way, I thought I would give a short history. 

       

      I joined this site when it was TW back about 6-7 years ago now and was a chat hostess as well as being in overall charge of the forums, a role that passed to Christine who I have no doubt has been admirable. I left just as this site, GS, was launched and I won't go into details here as to why, as some of it is personal. I spoke to Katie at the time and decided to keep my account active, because, well, as a great man once said, "I'll be back!" And so I am. I hope some of my forum posts were useful to new members reading them for the first time, and I am looking forward to seeing old friends here as well as making new ones. My apologies to anyone over the last two years who has sent me a friend request. I wasn't ignoring you, I just havn't been online. (I'm not sure if the new site displays one's last log in anymore, that would have been the clue). I'm going to take some time to find my way around again and will no doubt pop into the chat room to say 'hello'. 

       

      In the meantime, I will be browsing the forums and will add my two cents worth to the conversations in there and get a feel for this place again. As well as figuring out how everything works again!! Lol.

       

      I look forward to chatting with you all. 

       

      Nikki x

    • July 3, 2013 1:14 PM BST
    • The thing is that I actually left my mother behind as early as for ten years ago when she had alredy lost her mind. There was not so much point in visiting her any more as she did not even recognize me. My sister told me once that mom had taken her for her own sister once. Our aunt died in 1961, however.

       

      What I have been experiencing quite a lot of in these latest days is childhood memories returning to my mind. These include naturally some private moments that are natural between a child and a mother but there is also something in it that brings back some early thoughts about being a girl. I did not remember having had some of those thoughts which makes it even more complicated.

    • July 3, 2013 10:37 AM BST
    • I don't think it's inappropriate, and you certainly have no need to be excused.
      Stay happy.
      xx

    • July 3, 2013 4:14 AM BST
    • And about mom, she was not younger than 84 years old. That is an age hardly surprising to die in. In addition, my mother had the Alzheimer's for about 15 years. It may even have been a relief to some of her chiildren that she finally received the peace.

       

      I do know that saying the above is unappropriate. I hope to be excused, nevertheless.

    • July 3, 2013 4:08 AM BST
    • That would be lovely, Lucy. It is good to hear that somebody is even concidering  to continue with one's traditions.

       

      Furthermore, dear Lucy, I remember you as the very person who knows how to jump and scream. It has been a pleasure and an honour to meet up.

    • July 2, 2013 10:34 PM BST
    • Hi Tiina, it's lovely to see you here, though I am so sorry to hear your sad news.
      Good luck in your brave new world out of the closet!
      And a much belated good morning, perhaps I can carry that over for tomorrow.
      xx

    • July 2, 2013 2:18 PM BST
    • By the way, I want to be consequent in my bid to come out. I am therefore doing what I did in a Finnish trans web place community. That is disclosing my male Facebook identity. I would be honoured if any of my Gender Society friends would like to contact with me in Facebook.

       

      https://www.facebook.com/unclelarko

    • July 2, 2013 12:19 PM BST
    • Hello, everybody and good morning over quite a while!

       

      I had a discussion over private messages with Katie. She was kind enough to give me a go ahead for my wish to look around in this place to see if any old friends might be around. I want to say hello to everybody and anybody who would know me and also get to know persons who I have not yet had the pleasure.

       

      I have quite recently taken the step of outing myself as a transvestite. At the age of 56, it is not too early by any means. From the positive reactions by my old friends (who have always known me as a man) in Facebook and elsewhere I have concluded that this should have been done much earlier. Better late than not at all, though.

       

      Having lived in Estonia for the last three years, I visited Finland last week for the first time during these three years. The compelling reason was the funeral of my mother.  I was naturally dressed as her son in the funeral service rather than a daughter but my sisters and their children knew that I was actually their aunt rather than an uncle. All of this is not uncomplicated to cope with.

       

      I am not quite on a mood to scream and jump today but I would be happy to observ it if somebody else would :-)

    • June 24, 2013 2:13 PM BST
    • welp this morning i some how got up and wandered down to the ciggy store, holding my left hand upto my throat and working on a pitch and tone, and to my nice surprise i heard my voice speak out to the cashier. so i am all jazzed and trying slow slow down and not exersize my voice to much. i have really looked for it. just kind of cher and pink sing alongs. pitch and tones, off and on. i was not even tryng to, my walk was spread out i was not tucked under or anything.

       

      So to all the lovely lady's out here today pink roses and hugs, blown kisses. i am blushing hell yes i love it. i am alive.

    • April 12, 2013 6:50 PM BST
    • sure ,just head your Lear to Dallas and i jump in