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For all fellow Lexophiles ...

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  • For all fellow Lexophiles (Lovers of Words)

    1. A bicycle is too tired to stand up alone.
    2. A will is a dead giveaway.
    3. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
    4. A backward poet writes inverse material.
    5. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
    6. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
    7. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.

    8. You are stuck with a debt if you can't budge it.

    9. He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.

    10. A calendar's days are numbered.

    11. A boiled egg is hard to beat.

    12. He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

    13. A short fortuneteller escaped from prison: a small medium at large.

    14. Those who get too big for their breeches will be exposed in the end.

    15. When you've seen one shopping centre you've seen a mall.

    16. You would be in Seine to jump off a Paris bridge.

    17. When she saw her first strands of grey hair, she thought she'd dye.

    18. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.

    19. Acupuncture: a jab well done.

    20. Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of defeat.

    21. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He got fat from too much pi.

    22. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian .

    23. She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.

    24. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of maths disruption.

    25. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

    26. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was charged with littering.

    27. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

    28. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. Several police are looking into it.

    29. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

    30. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab centre said: 'Keep off the Grass.'

    31. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

    32. Don't join dangerous cults: practice safe sects.
      February 27, 2011 9:54 PM GMT
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  • Moderator
    2 2627
    Those are great!
    <p>Karen Brad</p>
      February 27, 2011 10:12 PM GMT
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  • Read em, and gone back and re-read em and still laughed as much the second time around


    I am not going to spank you, said the sadist to the masochist.
    Cristine Jennifer Shye.  B/L.  B/Acc
      February 28, 2011 4:10 PM GMT
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