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So Today ,
I took a days Holiday went to London, main reason was see gender Specialist for routine appointment. Writing now I think I should explain first what a "Miranda" is and How its part of a Transgendered Persons life [ at least M2F]. Miranda Hart is a UK Comedienne [ a GG] quite commonly on Television, See http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miranda_Hart
Main facet of Mirandas comedy is based on her Physical Image, See You Tube Medley to get the idea
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UTf17cmPl0I
. -There it is , delivery Man comes in to Mirandas Pet shop, asks for a signature , Miranda Scribbles , delivery Man says "Thank you Sir" and casually carries on with his job. Miranda just looks to Camera No words ... The expression says " Yes I get this and not for the first time , not a lot I can do about it, seeing as you have already made up your mind. ".
I love this because it is Humour as an education by means of self reflection, not as a harmful sneer at someone else. [theres a quote not sure where- If you can laugh at youself you will always be amused].
So you are trying your best , refining the changes and look. Your Voice is not Great though. --Yes thats me, but I am happy with things.
- My first Miranda was getting a Rail Ticket. I asked the Lady at the Ticket Kiosk for an all day Ticket with London Underground pass and paid for it by Card. Possible reason was I handed over the Card [ name not changed] , or Probably Voice. it was early morning.Incidentally I thought I was being wise by buying the Underground ticket at the start of the journey, as on a Previous Outing London I got a Miranda from the Waterloo Station Ticket office . I thought Image wise I looked alright, clothes selection and Hair are good , and I just tend to be very relaxed, helps the movement.
Before the second Miranda , I walked up and down Oxford Street before 9.30, Shops where not open yet[ it is London afterall]. The early Breakfast cups of Tea had taken their effect, leading me to seek out an early Opening Coffee shop. I prefer Costa Coffee , but settled for Starbucks at the point of Mild desperation. Thats nice , discreet 2 Floor lay out and Unisex Toilets. , through the Door, ladies is seperate okay, oh dear a queue..This early!!. At this point in time I am okay ,but did not want to wait in the queue . I guess there is a side to me that says be discreet you just want to fit in and be unnoticed, even if there is a remote chance I dont want anyone to be upset If I am queuing in the ladies. Plan B theres another Starbucks other side of the road, . Had a small Mocha, and Fruit Salad. Iam sure "Skinny Latte" sounds more feminine than Mocha , but I like the chocolate and dont understand why any Milk should be skimmed and made skinny in the first case.
I am revived after the Mocha and Fruit salad. My tip for weight is eat lots of fruit . It has been proven that the Fruit Bat is the greediest Animal in the Zoo in terms of consumption over Body weight, and it can still fly.
There are some thoughts i put down on the IPAd in preperation for the Appointment , remind myself of some questions to be asked, go through what has been changing and my circumstances. I tend to be more balanced and Focused about everything now..long may this continue ..but there is life and the things we cannot control
- Second Miranda- By this time the shops have opened so I take advantage of the large Selection, still Sales Items available. I am very Selective nowadays , and the mones are having the effect that I am more discriminating . the fabrics have got to be soft and make me go mmh thats nice. Time to try somethings on.... I cannot go over board as it is the age of Austerity and I am as affected by the economic situation as most people. Ah Just got time before the appointment .. I try on the Garments in the Ladies Fitting room after being presented with the plastic security key thingy by the Lady attendent. I am slowly getting used to the Multi mirror s front back and side . Unfortunately there an angle that draws attention to my Thick neck, which has not yet been masked over by my hair growing long. Still its getting better , and not as bad as it once was. The Jumper with roll neck is very good and has a long body length , extends passed the bum and billows out a bit there .will go weel with a High Waist Belt[ my prefferedDress fix] breaks the Naturally Straight Body line allows curves to be suggested by the Dress Drape [ I think anyway]. Other throw over long cardy is good also , very Soft and light Purple [colour i like] and the big plus of pockets . I am always on the look out for convenient dresses with pockets , but Choice looks limited.
Meanwhile I listen to the 2 Lady Attendents Chatting ,The young One says something about an instance when she got upset with her Dad and said "Listen you dont know what its like to be a Teenage Girl with all these Hormones".
Pleased with Myself as the price was good I go to the older Lady Attendent "How where they ", "Very Good, I think I will take these" I said ,
I handed over the Plastic Security thingy.."Thank You Sir" She said 0-2
I quickly Paid for the Wooly Jumpers , with card, and Rushed to the appointment
It was my Third Appointment , but they must have changed something on the entrance As I could not locate it I embarrasingly rang them to ask which number . All went well at the appointment .
Afterwards I was reflecting on my reaction to the Miranda instances, and trying to make sure I have smiley contented type face . This is actually How I feel nowadays , but I am conscious that through the years I default to a scowl which is not friendly , and does not really help me [ ot anyone else for that Matter].
I walk pass by this small petit Lady Hair swept Back well defined Smiley Cheeks , dressed casually and stylish and warm [ there is still a bit of morning chill]. Afterwards I think Could that Have been Kylie. Well those sort of things dont matter. [ In a past incident Jose Mourinho bashed my Computer bag whilst rusing to get to the lift in a Hotel in Korea whilst I was on a business trip [ in the boom time]. I did not notice it was him , as he is considerably smaller than my perception
well outside my Radar Screen. ] We are all People , however famous ,however different .
After Appointment . I had a nice Quiet Contemplative Lunch of Tea and a small Sandwich. Eating it slowly Whilst lloking at the Aerial display of Formation Pidgeons from the window on a high floor in the dept store Coffee shop . I felt relaxed. I went back to the department store to get some girly Running Togs. I like to keep Fit and cross country Running,jogging what ever you like to call it has always been something I do and find comfort it, especially early in the morning when its quiet and still.
I found a few pairs that will do me Amazingly I do not get an additional Miranda in the process,
I meander my Way to the bottom floor and go past the Cosmetic dept , lovely Scents. I think I have not really got a good grasp of Make up , too many other things to sort out and occupying my mind . But today is an opportunity. London is not bad in this respect , there is a certain anonymity you can have , afterall There are lots of tall Girls , Lots of varied people
Many of the people in London have the attitude " I will only see you once "
. I am not trying to draw attention to myself . The mones are certianly making me feel more relaxed. I ask on e of the attendents at he cosmetic counter what is the recommendation for Fair skinned People like me with Auburn hair , and light Eye brows . Sensing a a Sale .. I was made to feel comfortable and seated [ in the middle of a Busy London department Store] and advised wwith a makeover . My eyes where done also , I wish I could do Eyeliner.. Wow thats good I never thought My face and eyes could look this good . Lesson there is no shame in concealer]
It was time to make my way back to the train station to return home . I got off the underground at Embarkment, remembering there was a Costa Coffee shop there. I had a small Mocha , and Blueberry Muffin and was called Madam. [1-2].
I sat close to a Eurpean couple [French and Italian] of my Age talking, The lady was talking about her Eyesight ,after 40 ,50 and glasses to her partner. She looked at me as I was just putting my glasses back on after cleaning them ,I smiled , she smiled back.Sometimes theres a reminder We share more in common than our differences.
[ The Miranda scores mean nothing stop counting]
I decided to walk over Jubilee Bridge to Waterloo Station. it winter time now and the suns getting lower. Its been a nice day and the sky has cleared enough to now be warm. I stop halfway across the bridge, look at the water , and shut my eyes toward the sun. Its just Nice to take some time away for yourself occasionally. My mind often adds a sountrack to events , it started to play Waterloo Sunset . This made me feel good . I remember liking english Writing creative essays at school , there was big poster in the class room of Terence Stamp and Juliet Christie."Far from the Madding Crowd". Happy Times... I ambled along to the train station and went home .. A day well spent . time to simply capture it
January 16, 2012- -
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