Hello, I'm new here, and relitivly new to cross dressing. I could actually do with some help, although I have been reading this forum for about half an hour and there's a lot of nice, helpful people here, but I've barely scratched the surface.

I don't know where to start, so sorry if the following is rather disjointed.

I'm 19, and have enjoyed dressing for about 18 months, maybe 2 years. Although, when I was a lot younger going through puberty, I'd take some of my sisters clothes to wear while no one was in.

When I realised excatly what I was doing, and started to understand and become comfortable with my sexuality (I'm bi), I started to buy my own clothes (eBay is my friend). I have a few favorites; ankle boots, smart black trousers and Miss Sixty jeans are the most comfortable and make me feel much sexier, than if I was dressed in my "normal" clothes (I probably infact look very strange, but if no one can see me, that doesn't matter). A few months ago, late at night when I could be sure no one was going to wake up and see me, I went into my back garden for a fag, dressed as a woman. I thought my heart was going to burst through my chest.

Since then, I have been in my garden dressed in daylight, early in the morning, before any of my neighbours wake up. I'm not ashamed of who I am, but I am scared. Scared of what other people with think and mainly, my parents finding out.

My next goal, is to venture into my garden wearing a skirt. I even shaved my legs in anticipation of this event. Sadly, I didn't have the bottle to go through with it, when I realised the sky was clear, and it was very light out. Maybe another day.

That's about as far as I have got. I don't know much about fashion, really. I also have no idea what hair style would suit me, or what colour lipstick to wear ect. Any tips would be very appriciated.

Another thing I have been thinking about, is herbal tablets that make your breasts bigger. I certainly wouldn't have a problem giving them a go, but I'm not sure if the process can be reversed (I doubt it, somehow) if I'm not happy afterwards.

I plan a shopping trip next week, even if I don't buy anything, it'll give me the chance to see what's avaliable in the ladies section, without any of my family or friends wondering why I'm looking at blouses.

I could probably rattle on for ages, but I shall resist. It felt good typing this post, but I do feel somewhat silly.

Thanks for reading.

Rebecca

I guess gender dysphoria is the case only if you feel or are convinced that you are actually a girl and you feel the need to have changes in your body and life according to that.
That is a quite rare case, I´m one of those who have that diagnosis and have gone through the whole process until today I am a woman, physically, socially and legally.
It is a long way, but also possible.

Laura

Thank you all so much. You've made me feel very welcome.

I've not posted at all due to being away this weekend, but I hope to be around most of this week, and the forseeable future.

Love you all. x

Rebecca
Hope you are still check the posts. I read your letter and my heart skipped a beat remembering those times. They are the best. I have been cross dressing since at least 4-5 yrs old but only off and on and probably don't know enough to give you any advice but most people are willing to accept you. If they don't then maybe they aren't worth it. The feeling is wonderful sneeking around, and the feelings we get, I think just solidfy we are doing the right thing. Everyone has there own level, I am not bi but sometimes a wish I was. I mean sometimes I feel like it, but then I remember I have been there and afterwards.... nothing. Anyway, the taste of lipstick and the feeling of putting on mascara will never go away. As for shopping, I do a lot of shopping non-femme, no one really cares chances are you will never see the check-out person again anyway. The only draw back is... you get could at returning stuff. lol

Rebecca

Welcome to TW. Your story will be very familiar to just about everybody here. We all went through a very similar period of self discovery, anxiety and finally acceptance.

You will find many people here to talk to who can share advice and experiences.

As for "herbal tablets that make your breasts bigger" I can't advise you on that and personally I wouldn't stick anything in my body if I didn't know where it had come from or what was in it but many here would tell you otherwise .. but that's half the fun of being here.

Stick around and get to know us you'll find we're a mixed crowd but hopefully fun to be with.

Regards

Cerys x

Hi Rebecca,

I get the impression that you have already helped yourself by writing this post. It sounds like you just had a lot of stuff to get off your chest and you did.

If it's help with coming out that you think you may need in the future, there are plenty of people here who have been there already - I'm sure there will be no shortage of advice.

As for herbal 'mones, please remember that just because a product is labelled "herbal" does not mean that it is safe.

I would always advise seeing your GP before embarking an any kind of treatment like this. A little knowledge can be very dangerous.

Finally, I think you are now realising that dressing is addictive. You start with small things and gradually need more and more. It's a bit like being a heroin addict because you will always need a bigger, better fix, every time.

The big difference is that heroin addicts can be cured but transgenderism is for life - it's part of you.

Although it has various medical names like Gender Dysphoria and the like, most of the girls I know do not consider it to be a disease. We consider it a gift and I hope you will too.

No over to someone else...

Hugs,

Katie x

Hi Rebecca, and welcome to TW. You're going to love it here.

I won't repeat what the other girls have already said here duing this forum thread. But just know that if you have any questions, concerns, fears, jokes, or whatever, we are willing to listen to you. I somewhat share your fashion sense, and have also taken some chances with being dressed right outside my house. My wife knows about my being Meredith and really does not like it at all, but we're dealing with it.

You are who you are, and there is no need to be ashamed. Feel free to contact me any time if you want to chat. Meredith

Hi Rebecca & another welcome to TW. I'm kind of new to though I'm 46. I tried keeping it pushed in a corner but like Katie said it never went away. When I found TW I didn't know how or what to ask. I allways thought it was just the clothes, it's not. It's letting the girl in me out.
Good idea waiting on the tea. Before you make those kind of changes you need to know thats what you want. If you just want to see how it looks you can find help allready in these forums.
I don't dress all the time but getting to know myself is making me a happier person. Thats all the time. Good luck!
Karen