I have followed from side a few relationship stories of my ts friends. I have warned two of them rather not to start anything in the middle of their transition, but they both started an affair with a woman and both ended the same way: the woman, in the start understanding, changed her mind and wanted that her ts partner would make a head turn and become a real man. Both relationships ended with tears, because this wish just could not be met. Now one of these ts women told me she is about to jump into another relationship with a woman...but is not quite sure if she is lesbian or hetero at the end of her transition. I´m sorry for her, but she seemingly she just needs a partner at her side, be it then for a limited time...
I´m convinced myself that all relationships must be based on our true identity. And even if we have maybe a clear picture of ourselves as the "end product" of our transition, that picture cannot be transmitted to our partner, who has got used to a certain stability in the world and cannot imagine the situation in the future, the person in question will not be any more the same as on the day they met.

Laura

I'll chime in with Wendy on this topic.

Any time you are making a big change in life, keeping other things a constant will help.

If you are in a relationship, try to keep it going. If you're not, don't start one.

Don't change jobs, homes, etc.

Focus on the big thing: the change in you.

Hugs,

Kari

I don't have any deep knowledge on this topic, but both Laura and Sandra make some good points.

I do know that addicts in the early (inpatient) stages of recovery are strongly discouraged from starting a relationship with another client for reasons of psychodynamics; the need to straighten out their own head first. It makes sense that it would apply during TS transition in many cases.