Hello all
just thought i'd post this as it has really got my back up today. A very close freind of mine, who has been dressing for years, hasn't hurt anyone, keeps herself to herself, seem's to have been subjected to some harsh treatment today.
Basically what happened is she was seen out dressed in female attire by somebody who know's her. Her next door neighbour, who she has known for years approached her today and said" you were seen out dressed like a woman". Before my freind had time to try and talk to this woman, she was blanked as if she did not exsist.
I have witnessed this for my self today, from this so called neighbour, this has really had a bad affect on my freind who thought this woman was a freind. I have had to reassure her that all will be ok,so it just goes to show people are scared of the unknown and it is hard for us in this day and age to try and live the way we want to without being judged love JJ xx

Thanks sandra i will pass on your advice love JJ xx

Thanks hun' i did dicuss that route with her, basically approaching the local beat bobby and tell him what was occuring. I hope it won't come to that but thank you anyway love JJ xx

i will sandra and thank you once again love JJ xx

Maria my freind was seen in the street hun, which for her make's things a little more difficult. In her own home as you say she can do what she like's, neighbour's seeing you dressed and thought you were someone different to what they see now are hard to educate. Sandra said the best piece of advice, if it persist's or anything nasty happen's report it to the authority's love JJ xx

Hi sandra
i have just come off the phone to her, she seem's in a more positive mood, let's hope it is the start of good things again. Thank you all for your input it has helped love JJ xx

Dear Julie:

You always need to consider the consequences of this. If your friend was always in the closet, and she wants or needs to remain with this attitude, indifference is the best approach.
If the neighbor insists, your friend must candidly and firm remain indifferent. We don´t know if the neighbor will gossip with this. But if your friend is not afraid to open her situation, she must be very candid again, and say simply yes, I was. What is in it for you? Personally I am more closer to the first position and was caught by a neighbor in man mode in a TV bar. Of course, neither him nor myself want to say anything. But if I had been caught as the lady I like to be, indifference would be my attitude. After all I am much prettier as lady than as boy.Hugs, kisses and good luck. Naty

Hi all
just an update on how my freind is doing, all seem's to be quiet from the neighbour from hell. My freind has pushed forward and seem's to be pretty upbeat, we are erecting a fence in her garden this weekend. This is just to give her some privacy not to hide from her neighbour.
So for the moment things seem to be ok, thank's for your support my freind was well touched, and asked me to thank you all
so i have "thank you" any changes i will let you know love JJ xx

dear julie, i no this mite be a bit late, ive only just read it. im sorry to hear of wot has happened and my heart goes out to ur friend. i do hope that it doesnt hold her back, shes a good person, give her a big hug from me and i hope she comes out of it a stronger person, shes better than her neighbour, with "friends" like that, who needs enemies, xx

I agree with the you needs the neighbor's deal. My girlfriend
and I have one that is also a bitch. First off she's my
girlfriend's best friend, but she is two-faced about what she
tells us. She is very homophobic(sp) and if she finds out that
we go to a PFLAG meeting we get a lecture about the straights
and the gays.

She has to give her views on everything and I think she just tries to upset people on purpose. I for one can't stand her
I wish that we could move or that she would die. And this
woman lives in the USA. Thanks for putting up with my ranting.

Hi Randi
Things are not quite that bad for my freind at the moment, But i feel for you hun. That must feel like big brother is watching you!, i couldn't handle someone like that telling me the pro's and con's of being straight or gay.
Why not ask her what she does in the bedroom maybe she might leave you alone for a while.........then again she might lecture you on that too. Good luck hun with your neighbour love JJ xx

Hi All
Intolorence can be found every where.if that had happend to me I would have told my niegbour it was my sister or cousin (unless it was obvious ie i hadnt shaved).But the cat is out of the bag now.
1: Your freind has now discovered her neibours true colours.
2: She has a chance to turn the negative into a positive and help her to become stronger.
When being who we are it is an inevitability that some one will discover ones secret one day.This was allways at the back of my mind when dressing at first.This could lead to fear controlling ones life and actions.I realise that this is not the best of situations to deal with, but julie did your freind not think that whilst out in her garden that some neibour would see her ? I am truley sorry that she was shaken by this experience,if you go out dressed even in your own garden then the risk of being discovered must go up considerably.I realy hope that she can turn this experience into something positive become stronger and put this behind her. Time can be the greatest of healers and I suspect that her neibour links crossdressing with perversion and id just as shocked and appalled by your freind as your freind is by her.Not every one has the wisdom to live and let live and to not be judgemental.So i suggest that your freind try to make allowences for her neibour and try to understand the experience from her viewpoint even if her neibour cannot recipricate the act herself.My experience of such matters is that you can win people over if you can be likeable and liked as a person then often comming out as gay or whatever can be less of a problem.
Still this is the real world and this experience may make your freind just a bit more cautious but I hope that it does not destroy her confidence as this the real wepon she needs.

With best wishes and support to your freind Sarah Ann. XXX

I was very lucky with my neighbours. I moved to a new dwelling when I started full time. Exact timing. So, my new neighbours have seen me only as a woman. And they could not imagine anything else.

Laura

Laura i am pleased for you, my friend seems to be having no hassle what so ever"touch wood", the idea of moving is on her mind and we did dicuss when she move's, move as a woman and things will be easier.
Thanx for for your comments to sarah, i have even taken them on board. So to cap it all off she is doing fine and the nieghbours seem to keep them selves to them selves........love JJ xx

julie,this woman sounds like a right bitch!! what your friend does in her own place is entirely up to her,not this bigoted,ignorant bitch!!. i'm behind your friend 100 %.lol and x maria

Tend to agree Sarah - at the moment it has never happened to me but we did get some looks when we went out in London - lynne and myself - no one said anything although a security guy in a shop did follow us around as we looked for some make up - If the person was a friend then what sort of friend were they if they are unable to talk to you?