No matter whether we’re CD, TV, TS, or any point in between, having a friend, family member, or partner, to help us accept ourselves for the whole person that we are, and to walk with us on our journey of discovery is the most valuable thing we can possess.
Being transgendered is a pervasive condition that touches every aspect of our lives. Every decision and thought we have, is clouded by our being Transgendered and the fear of being discovered, ridiculed and exposed.
Our condition makes us very self aware and self focused, and the danger for us is that it’s all too easy to slip into selfishness. Constantly questioning what we do and how we feel and what it all means to us as individuals, means that the significant others in our lives are constantly bombarded by our apparent selfishness.
Allowing ourselves to come out of hiding is the hardest thing for us to do. Accepting us and being supportive is a hard thing for you to do. Walking what can seem to be a dark and scary path into the unknown is a difficult thing for us both to do. Being there together, holding hands, encouraging, complimenting and exploring, is the route we try to take.
Having a supportive SO is the most valued thing a girl can have.
Supporting the supportive SO is the most important thing we need to do.
Well said!
Being the SO sucks! I have been lied to soooo much I can't make sense out of our 22year relationship. He (she) stole, lied, avoided responsiblities and as taken time away from me and my family. My husband has not remembered anniversaries, or birthdays, he is always focused on himself (herself). Is it any wonder why so many SO's hate the female in their husband...
Mandy you so hit the nail on the head. Selfishness.
condition makes us very self aware and self focused, and the danger for us is that it’s all too easy to slip into selfishness. Constantly questioning what we do and how we feel and what it all means to us as individuals, means that the significant others in our lives are constantly bombarded by our apparent selfishness.
Just trying to figure out what to do.....without hurting myself anymore.
sam
Hello Sam,
I’m not sure if your partner is, “selfish because he is transgendered” or he is “selfish and transgendered” To be honest it sounds like he is selfish and
Mandy.
Hi Sam, I just read your forum topic ... it reminded me my experience - 4 years spent looking after my bother, he had been ill ... Anyhoo, he was released into my care ... where his behaviour was that of a spoiled brat ... bad tempered, aggressive, impatient, petulant, whenever he got into a mess he would use his condition as a Free Pass ...
When we were clearing dads house I got meet his support/rehabilitation team, whom in a moment of candor confided, "Er .. you are nothing like your brother ...' When I pressed Jim and Lauren on this they explained, 'Your brother isn't likeable - it's the type of person he is, his personality and there isn't a treatment for that ... Our advice is to be careful when dealing with him, watch your back ...'
3 months after their advice my brother began an action in court which resulted in the first of 3 malicious law suits against me and my fathers legal representative ...
The last letter my attorney recieved from him declared, 'You have ruined my life and as far as I am concerned you are dead to me' ...
Which sadly was a relief ... so you are not alone in this situation ... there is however no easy or quick solution, so think carefully before acting