Having read recent posts and thinking where I am now [which is  a pivotal point now.. been on Hormones seen the Doctors, know myself,seen myself change  but yet to make the decisive declarations in my local world, name change, inform work] . Time to put down some thoughts,

on appreciating there are different types of coming out 

- Coming out in the wider world- Fascination but not realization. ..You get to that point where you have to express yourself, this "thing" has  been bugging you for ages  , you have managed to get the clothes ,[ and maybe done a few purges..along the way]. Its all very secretive and self conscious of what you look like [kinda selfish ? maybe]. So you maybe find a location away from the locality where people may not notice you.If your life style and local commitments allow maybe you get to do this often ..or maybe it just seems too difficult , but you enjoy the experience. and have those thoughts about what you need to "improve".But have the fear of what if .

-Coming out in the wider world- Increasing  realization, and reality checking.Maybe you get the opportunities,and start to feel more comfortable with yourself , and go to those locations away from Home,  and start to think what this all means and become increasingly aware of keeping  a divide , between this World and the local world where people "Know" you . This is a really difficult time, because you havent yet formed those connections and ideas of your self that would allow you to move on with your own life. Maybe at this time you make the right decision to seek Councilling and Therapy and talk to that part of the Wider World with experience of the Transgender person.You start to think long and hard about your local world and how accepting or otherwise it might be. In truth you havent got a clue what the reaction will be 

- Coming Out of Yourself to sort yourself out...At this point I am  thinking about the spacemen who have to go out of the spaceship to fix it, otherwise..thats it . You start to make stronger connections with who you are and what your life is about and it includes a kind of self aligning .At this point maybe you start to feel better , and see those excursions into the wider world as more enjoyable and more what your life is about.This is point where you are coming out in the sense of thinking about how to approach  the close Local World  thats been held at a distance.

- Coming out -- "Please dont think that you do not know me anymore "..Best way I can express those Fraught Emotions when you have SO' s . Transgender people make mistakes [its inevitable],we are Human, but personally it hurts when you think and maybe see the closest people move away from you when you tell them that you cross- dress , or think that you are transexual....Time can heal..I am just so grateful that I can rationally express myself to my SOs after making such a declaration. and have the chance just to live with them and share a life , contributing to their life as best I can . Importantly giving them the time to understand and make their own mind up  about you and where you fit in their life. Be mindful that you may be coming out more significantly and appearing to change more rapidly to them than you are aware. This will probably be frightening to them and needs a heartfelt understanding . If they ask for time ,give gladly 

- Coming out --"Where are you going,how far  and why ?". This is your question alone  and to live in your world , both the  wider one  and hopefully still the local home world  with your past , you have to have an answer.You might not  have been thinking about such a question, when you first stepped out,teetering on the verge of an Ankle Injury ..but  

  ..Well my Cup of Teas got cold . and I need to call Home, then clean the kitchen .. . Look after yourselves and Especially look after those around you 

Donna XX