Transphobia from people of my locality

    • 7 posts
    April 24, 2012 12:07 PM BST

    Last month i've been verbaly agress 2 times to be punch.
    2 different guys at 2 différent moments come one foot of me, yelling that that I'm fag, hiding and I have no balls (yes i'd lke to)... by the way they say also, that they're going to knock me out.
    And other kind othings 

     

    Other situations like that appeirs too often... theses days

    Since this winter I went my self tree times at psycho emergency, for too much ideas of suicide/homicide for prévetion...

     

    I called police few time but dont take any complain from me, at that time I'm verry stresed and I have difficulties to control my self. No one have seen or heard nothing, cops leaving the place whitout taking my complaint and neither indentify them self. According to this I have no chance to persue the creep who attact me and neither the cops.

    If I defend my self phisicly, for sure I'll be arrested, and by the way if I'm recognised as a criminal, no ******* chance to have my name change! as some friends told me in their own cases.
    I have so much too tell about it... It's so painfull 

    • 7 posts
    April 25, 2012 9:03 PM BST
    How do you manage your own transphobia situations?
    If there is any...
    • 95 posts
    April 26, 2012 3:20 AM BST
    Hi Sweet Doll. First, I'm very sorry you have been verbally assaulted and threatened. No one deserves that type of treatment and I think the police should have taken a report of what happened to you. If you know these men who did this to you please call the police on the phone and make a formal complaint and name them so there is a record of what happened to you on file. If these were strangers I suppose now there is not too much you can do. Perhaps still call the police and report what happened to you and where this took place and describe them.

    I'm also sorry you have been so stressed. I can relate to the pain you are feeling and think many girls here can too. Do you have any type of support in your life? Friends or family? There should be some transgender groups in your area? Quebec is a large city right? I know things can get overwhelming and confusing.Remember you are not alone. You are not a bad person for being and feeling who you are. Try not to let the haters get you down either. They have way more issues then you do if they act like that. Trust me!

    Safety should be a big concern for all of us. Remember take the same precautions any genetic girl would take. Be careful at night and don't walk alone if at all possible. Stay in well lit areas and follow your gut about possible dangers in your surroundings. Stay very aware of people in the streets and avoid eye contact or keep it extremely brief. Try your best to stay out of bad areas too. I am against guns and knives myself but if you do live in a really bad area where danger is a constant issue think about carrying a can of mace with you or maybe even a taser. Make sure it is all street legal if you do this and only use it in physical confrontation where you fear for your safety.

    I don't know Canadian law because I am american but I don't think defending yourself from an attacker or being convicted of a crime has anything to do with a legal name change.

    I'm sorry you are having a hard time. You look really nice in your picture. I hope you stay at Gender Society. There are quite a few supportive girls and guys here who can help to talk with. It is a supportive community. I hope we can talk sometime here. xxx Jessica
  • April 26, 2012 7:00 AM BST
    Canada has signed up to the Human Rights and deiscrimination laws so you shoudln't be getting any hassle - but then Montreal is a bit catholic an dhouses CAMH concentration camp so TS are seen as freaks.
    Look around town for a support organisation?
    • 7 posts
    April 26, 2012 6:42 PM BST

    Hi Jessica,
    Thank you for your kindness, supporting and understanding.

     

    I tried mostly what you suggested me.

    I come to a point I have no more energy to follow all the cases: 6 at human rights; 10 criminals attempts not registered, for that I’ve contacted the justice minister to inform them by the this question, how can be secure if no cops took my 911 calls seriously and asking about what’s under my clothes that not the real issue of my call.

    Last month I got depressed and having suicide ideas.
    Now I’m lonely and secure at home.
    Getting out only for food.
    Yes I have a trans support group, and there also I got sexually touch without asking for it, by an employee who’s trans too. I wrote personally a letter to her and got her and coordinator signed that I don’t what her talking, standby me on any way to me. And this case is part of human rights cases.
    For family I consider them as they all dead for me, cause they were my first transphobians aggressors.
    I’ve been their toy for playing jackass…

     

    For professional consulting I’m broke, I had sextherapist for my transition and can’t pay to see her.

     

    I got aggressed, mistreated and call by my ancient name at the hospital at my last 3 visits to prevent suicide. I asked to leave immediately cause I went there on my own will and I want to get out of there cause I’m getting worst then when I enter there and going somewhere else where I can find respect as human being.

    So they let me go… I got home whit all comfort I need finaly and contact friends on the web, I found support and a brand new group of lesbians on the web and a support for lesbians association at Montréal city whit full activities.

     

    When I shot off a door, this time is a garage door opens for me cause I was so determined to find something in this way.

     

    All I can say now is, I wrote so much about it to empty my head of this pressure, it helps me to shout it out to find more appropriate meets whit the right peoples.

     

    It seems that nothing and no one is working for me, I find that I have to keep working my happiness myself.

    I took the blow, and the lesson is took!

     

    I’ll let the dust go down and some day, my head will be clear enough to make good decision about what to do.

     

    For now I rest at home and taking vacation away from all theses bad things I’ve experienced last month.

     

    Yes I’ll stay in touch here, and dating for fun to know new friends in the right gender that I’m looking, to keep up the spirit and happiness. ;-)

    • 7 posts
    April 26, 2012 6:50 PM BST
    Since my first writting here, I find two groups: web and association of lesbibans.
    and I retook contact courses for personal growth. whit no pils added!
    Isn't it great?
    • 7 posts
    April 26, 2012 7:04 PM BST

    @ Rose White
    You so nice...
    Laws and helth system, is base on insainety of transsexuality by "gender dysphoria".

    Actualy in Ontario, there's a thing going that we can change name and gender legaly whitout surgery, if we live there one year...

    and it's comming soon here in Montreal.

    But I did my choice to get vagino-plastie, and no psy permit me yet to have it, I'll find someone who can permit me to have it finally.
    I can't live no more whit this thing that just can piss whit it.

     

    Thank you for your helping comments.

  • April 26, 2012 8:26 PM BST
    I ha dexactly the same trouble with the idiot shrinks but I have them in troubl ewitht eh courts now so just keep hanging on and being yourself.
    • 7 posts
    April 26, 2012 9:06 PM BST
    Rigth on Rose! thanks
    you too take care,,,xx
  • May 6, 2012 1:49 AM BST

    Sweet Doll I'm really sorry you have to go through so many bad things with these people. It makes me want to cry knowing that they take pleasure out of doing this to us. The problem with haters is that they don't realize how much pain it is to be the way we are but they refuse to understand. I hope things are better for you now then they were a month ago.

     

    Hugs and kisses


    This post was edited by Kristina Ruggirello at May 6, 2012 1:49 AM BST
    • 7 posts
    May 6, 2012 3:56 AM BST
    Yes of course Kristina...
    By letting you know how I feel about my situation,
    I let go all the pressure around this big mess…
    I know this is a turn off to get a match whit someone here,
    but it seems to me that I’m not alone and it gives me energy to get well…
    Recently I find someone and it was about time for me…

    Thanks to you all
    ;-) XXX