It didn't work

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    I took over 20 xanax and 15 klonopin pillls as well as some doans nightime back pain pills .  I expected to die and was unafraid to do so but I didn't.  I did tell my wife about it and of course she is extremely concerned about my well being and mental health.  I can't see another path for me other than becoming a transsexual.  I would rather destroy me than my entire family and bring shame on them.  I am still very tired from taking all those pills so I am off to bed.  This was an actual suicide attempt and not a fake BS message to get attention.I didn't expect or want tob be here today yet here I am.  Like I always say I need all the help I can get.  Karen