|
|
|
Notifications
|
|
|
|
On Sunday evening I suffered a profound psychological blow that undermined my entire approach to life. I felt it in my heart and I'm now trying to make sense of it. At least it was not related to Ariane – not outwardly at any rate.
The world does not move as fast as I would like and people do not behave in the way I would expect. I will have to rearrange myself and revise my expectations.
I am still going ahead with the makeup lesson in a few hours' time (I hope) but I have cancelled Ariane's proposed weekend in Manchester. It was a deadline too soon given the other things I want to see happen before then. Also I do feel strongly the absence of a potential friendly contact that weekend.
I posted earlier about trans loneliness. I feel this now. Ariane online is an important part of me. Despite several attempts I still don't have anyone who wants to share my online life. Maybe I feel sorry for myself. But then no one else is going to feel sorry for me.
