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I had my big appointment today and it went even better than i'd ever dared to hope.I was nervous as hell as i walked up to the reception desk and told them who i'd come to see.I sat down in the wating room to be called and there were a few in but not many.Anyway i was called by rachel, and into her room i went.We sat down and the very first thing she asked me was what i wanted to be called and i said maria,which she called me throughout the time i was seeing her.I went through the whole routine,how long i'd been dressing,how it made me feel and the like,whilst rachel listened intently to what i said before making her response.We discussed all sorts of things,and she said that i'd got things pretty well sorted in my head so there were no problems there. I also told her about all the good friends i had made on TW,all round the world and she was very impressed with how i presented and handled myself.One thing she did do was change the name on the paperwork so that it read "maria" and not mark(my drab name),that made me feel soooo good inside it made me want to cry.We sat there nattering away just as if it was a woman to woman chat....which it was.I told her all about the fact that i'd chosen to go full-time as maria from 1st jan,and she really was very supportive in wishing me all the very best for my new life.She did suggest that if i wanted to change my name permanently to do it by deed poll which i am going to look into.The name on all my records are being changed so that "maria" is on all of them.I did say that i was looking for work "en-femme"and suggested i look at the beaumont society's website for some info.I have to go back in 2 weeks time to see her again and i cannot wait!!When i left the surgery i just felt so happy i wanted to burst into tears( another y trait i have picked up).I promised my good friend chrissy she'd be the first to know and i kept my promise to her,then i had to tell all my wonderful sisters on TW how i got on too.Whilst writing,i had my first comment on what i had written(god bless you Mere darling).I am just so glad...and soooo happy that i've done it,just wish i had done it sooner.I always knew it would be a long job,but i am prepared for it cos i want to find out just what makes me tick...with rachel's help i will do just that.I am just so happy it's not true(yes i am crying before you ask,but they are tears of sheer joy and relief that at long last i have done something positive.I had to share all of it with all of you,whom i love dearly!! love and xxxxxooooooo to you all.
