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Crying in my Dream

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  • Hi everyone I had this dream last night and it affected me profoundly....

     

    I woke up about an hour after going to bed last night and I was crying. This has happened before but a number of years ago. I sat at my computer and wrote the following

    ""It is 1am and I woke up about 30 minutes ago crying with a feeling of total desolation, despair and an awful grinding sensation in my stomach. Its like my feelings of Dsyphoria were ramped up to a 10  It has taken nearly 30 minutes for me to get myself back under control and stop- sobbing since I woke up. I don't get it what is this about, the feelings are similar to those I get when my Dysphoria is at its worst. The only clear thought under all this was could I get away with suicide without hurting everyone too badly and fortunately I come up with the answer "no I can't. What it gods name is wrong with me, is this really a symptom of my Dysphoria, is it really getting to this point, is it now so serious that a dream can knock me off balance into a crying Jag.

    I knew this was going to take awhile but I was hoping to make some progress along the way that would help me better deal with stuff. My makeover session just seems to have been the straw that broke the camels back, Maybe its because with a bit of work and the right clothes I would able to lead a private partly passable lifestyle"  

     

    This morning after a couple of hours sleep the feelings are still with me but not nearly as strong. I need this to stop.

     

     

      August 2, 2015 10:59 PM BST
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  • I Understand what you are talking about .many a night. I have woken up either crying or in a panic state from a dreadful dreamwheni wen tot my therapist i told here what my dreams were . she told me to write down my dream every morning.

    \  Than we wil see if there is a pattern.om y next session we reviewed them

    most of mine were about being ripped apart or being skinened alive of my outer skin...Like my mind is trying to remove the out er male skin to let the female out.

    most of these dream left me shakey and anxietized

    so i know and going throught the same battle

     

     

      August 3, 2015 2:19 AM BST
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  • I thInk what surprised me the most was the level of emotional disturbance it has caused me after I was awake. It has been with me all day. It is far less powerful but I did remember a fair bit of it after reading your post so I wrote down what had happened...it went like this

    "I got part of the dream back about midmorning and once again it had a powerful effect on me, but I do remember parts of it and especially the last part.

    My wife and I were being chased by three guys and I was desperate to protect her from them. I couldn't and she vanished. The three guys then appear in a car and I pay them off and they are supposed to leave me alone, the one who takes the money leers at me as he drives away saying we will be back...I have this sense that they have indicated that I may now get my wife back, then its just me and the three guys. I am bound up but can't see how or what with, I am desperate, they have lied, they are all laughing and leering, and then one of them says we better get on with it and pulls out a hammer and a spike, at this point the emotions of the dream come crushing in and I begin to cry...because its over...I am all over, they take the spike and crouch down at my ankles, I can't see what they are doing but I can see the top of the spike where both my legs should be , The hammer swings and the spike drives into my legs and I shatter. I wake still crying with a sense of such utter desolation, of being captured /trapped and a loss so great that it makes me physically ache.

    I feel emotionally exhausted"

     

    I have never really suffered bad nightmare up until the last 12 months where they have become more vivid and have taken an ever increasing toll on me with last nights being possibly the worst I have ever experienced.

                 

      August 3, 2015 4:17 AM BST
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  • if they comtinue write down them in a sprial note book...

    one of my dreams quit when my step father passed away   he was a reall pain in the ass to me.

    he was of the old old school that we use non con froming gender people should  be eliminated

    the way it sounded to me  that the dream was a un concious , session

    were you planining on grs in the future

     

      August 3, 2015 11:01 PM BST
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