Hi Fenix.
You are 4 days off being old enough to be a member here but I am sure the admin team will give you a break on that one or allow you 4 days grace before you can post again legally under the terms and conditions of GS.
I try very hard to encourage more FtM's to stay here and post here but they mostly just vanish. I cannot understand why because there is a mine of information here and a dedicated moderator (Jasper). He will help you if you just give him a chance. He maybe able to help you understand why you feel the way you do.
I am going to end this here for now to await to see if you return. I hope you do because if you need answers they are here somewhere.
Take care , Julia x
Oh, yes. I've talked to them and they're okay with it, it's just a few days. Thanks for notifying me, though!