I made a decision before I started on hormones. The decision wasnt an easy one, but I think an important one. My mother was hurt by the decision I made so I want to ask for your thoughts on this matter and ask if anyone has given simmilar thought to it.

I decided before I started on hormones NOT to have sperm frozen as I did NOT want MY genetics passed on. Its not that I dont want to be a parent. I do very much so. Thats probably my biggest fear, not becoming a parent.

So why my decision? There is still no real idea what causes transexualism. There is lots of theorys and ideas, but know one has nailed it yet. So I made my decision as a just in case it IS a genetic thing. I dont want a child of mine or grandchild or anyother relative of mine to have to go through what a transexual does.

I havent really had it that bad myself. I have known all along and my whole life was just a preparation for transition really. I am a strong willed person and have a good sence of myself. I have also had the luck of living in a tolerant family in a tolerant country in a pretty tolerant time, but who knows what the future will hold? Who knows how it could affect someone else? I just think its not worth the risk to spread my genetics.

I have had a chat to my Mum about this. She understands my reasons. I told her that I still want to be a parent and that it will still be my child even if there is no genetic link. She agrees, but was still a little hurt.

I'd like to know what you think? Have you made a similar decision? Did you do the opposite to me? DO you think I have made a reasonable decision? I'd love to know what you all think.

In a different world I would have never had children, but everything was so much different when I was young. There was no way out for me as a woman, so, after having looked for my way out until 25 I made the harsh decision "to be a man", and afterwards I can still feel the bitterness of that decision. It included pure self torture.
Yet, from my "male" life I have now my children, who stand by me and support me. So my loss has also a gain, and not a small gain.

Laura

No Sandra,

My Mum never expected me to be a father, but a mother. She was hurt because without doing so, I would never have kids of my own. She wants the very best in life for me and considers motherhood a wonderful gift, and thought of it not being able to happen for me as something sad.

There is always adoption and other such methods, but its not quite the same is it?

Um no,

She fully expects me to have a relationship as a womyn. I am ALREADY living full time and was BEFORE i started taking the hormones.

There isnt gay marriage yet in Oz, but its not uncommon for two womyn to live together as a married couple. She fully expects me to have a normal relationship like everyone else.

THIS IS POSSIBLE Sandra.

With my background any thought of coming out or establishing a relationship true to my nature have seemed impossible. And with the selftorture I inflicted on myself at age 11-12 I could not see myself in any relationship at all. Even playacting family was ruled out when I left childhood. So, because of the way things have been for me, I have no problem with understanding your choice.
Still, I'm sorry that I have no children and probably never will have any. It's the same with adoption here as in Italy.


Linda