As it is my 1st anniversary for living full time as my real self. I have been reflecting a little on my previous couple of years this lead to me wondering this.

How did you choose to transition ? I do not mean that the need to transition is a choice. I am asking how did you choose to transition from male to female externally ? after you had realised that you had too.


Did you decide to feminise your body with hormones etc till you reached a point that you felt that you could then step into your new life ?
Did you once you knew it was the only way you could be come out start living full time and transition slowly in the eyes of the world ?

For myself i had followed a 5 year plan and had all the pieces in place ready for full time living.I actually started full time on the day of my second GIC visit at this point I had informed my place of work everyone friends family etc.I felt like a coiled spring ready to explode.I personaly have no regrets of course the same wish as most which was "looking better than I did".My own experience has been amazing as the whole world has seemd quite happy to accept me suppose I may be lucky.

there can be no right way to do it or a best way to do it there is no manual we deal with this big step the best way we know how.

How did you do it ?

our circumstances with work family etc surely affect the choice ?
whether we are doing it through Private means or using the NHS all these factors must determine to some degree your whole approach.

I am posting this up again in response to the current topic posted by Marsha.

I hope that you can see that I am fully aware of the many issues that are faced by those transitioning. Use this one to answer my question so others can see the many and varied routes taken by the many women in here transitioning.

In 2004 I realised that I needed to transition. I was fully aware of the HBSOC but did not like the idea of going fulltime so quick. In early 2005 I finally found a psychiatrist who handled gender identity cases. Initially he suggested I follow the HBSOC. I pleaded with him because of my family and my business that I needed to transition slowly in front of everyone without them knowing. I think those that know me understand I can get extremely emotional. He did finally give in and wrote me my first scripts after several visits. About 6 months into HRT my shrink basically dissappeared. Phone disconnected, so I self med'd until I found a new doc in 2007.

After a year and half on HRT, I came to TW an emotional wreck because I litterally was drained from hiding this from everyone. Exactly what my shrink said would happen. Shortly thereafter, starting with my wife, I came out one by one to people in my life.

In 2007 I also started laser facial hair removal. I have little body hair, so shaving etc. is sufficient. In 2008 I had my teeth worked over so if you see my pics, smiles without teeth are probably pre 2008, lol.

I am not quite fulltime, but I may as will be. Other than a legal name change, I'm now always Marsha. My plan has been to wait until my youngest is out of high school in 2010. Like Sarah, it has been amazing to find that people have been so accepting. My biggest fear, debunked.

Hugs,
Marsha

Thank you Marsha for sharing your journey with us all here. HUGS.

I never described my journey completly so here goes.

The crunch for me came after 2 of my closest friends died in the same year It caused me to focus on Life what it meant and look at myself and situation. even though I had for many years suspected that I was not a TV and knew the ramifications of taking steps further but actually couldnt face trying to live in male mode anymore .
Step 1....made appointment to my GP who didnt know anything about transgendered or gender dysphoria but I went equipped with phone numbers and web site addresses to aid him in the next step.
Step2: refered to a NHS physchiatrist which was about 5 months after my visit to Gp there followed another session with psychiatrist who recommended a referal to the Gender Identity clinic.
Step 3 : Fisrt consultation to Gender clinic which through misfortune and bad luck caused me to turn up about 50 mins late for appointment . Docs refused to see me (because they are fully booked every day) so disapointed had to wait for my next appointment as I had already waited 6 months for the first one it was another 5 months before I finally got to see a Doc there. Then had to see adifferent Doc after another 6 months and wait to see if both docs agreed that I was TS/TG. then after those visits its a 3-4 monthly visit.On my second visit as I had a blood test done on my first visit at CX on same day I was told what the endocronologist had recommended for my treatment.
Step4: trying to get my GP to prescribe me the recommended hormone regime. He refused to ..lots of letters between him and GID clinic and he still refused to do so. I ditched him and found another GP who was as different as chalk and cheese compaired to my previous GP she prescibed me my hormones with no hesitation (she is a woman last GP an old fuddy duddy man). this had delayed me being on hormones by another 3 months.

I had my first IPL treatment in May 2007 just before starting full time. My IPL has still not been compleated due to finaces currently at half way stage.

As for my plan which I had followed over 5 years.
the first part of plan was working hard and up the job ladder.when I had reached the goal in job was when I took the next steps by going to the GP etc

In April of 2007 I was on Holiday with one other Ts and 5 TVs. I lived full time of course most of the Tvs didnt...but when I came back after being fulltime the whole week I just couldnt do male mode anymore so ammended my plan instead of doing some of the feminisation I had planned IPL,being on hormones I started living full time this was after mys econd visit to CX. so my timetable I had set in my plan was only altered by a few months.

Now been on hormones for 7 months. been working full time for 15 months. I still have plans inplkace for my SRS and a little FFS. but these can be flexible time table as I am living the life I had too.

I never mentioned the coming out to friends and family. which I did in april infact I only had 2 friends to reveal about being TS as I had told everyone else in the previous years. I am giving my family time to adjust no overtly bad reactions to mention but less contact than in the past which says it all to me and was expected so giving them time.

So I have taken the NHS route and jumping through the hoops they hold up for me, its slow but in its defence its merits are that it gives some the time to adjust as they change their lives and its not too sudden a change or shock to ones sytem.

Other steps I took.

In May I cleared out the very few male clothes I had and gave them to charity shops or chucked as was appropriate.I cleared out clothes that either no longer fitted or just wasnt me (femme clothes) then spent £800 on putting together a whole new wardrobe of clothes,coats,jackets ,jumpers,tops,trpouisers,skirts,dresses etc jewellry a whole seasons worth of clothes.

I changed all my documents driving license credit cards bank accounts etc in April after returning from my second visit to CX and did my deed pole name change on the same day applied for my GRC pack in readyness for my GRC when the ime was right.

everything went smooth as silk have found transitioning so easy as its just a natural state for me. thats the basics of how I did it.

Sarah Ann, Marsha

Thank you for your clear and open descriptions. In the cold light of day it all seems so simple whilst obviously it's anything but. You inspire and provide courage to others.

Rachel

Instead of editing my post I will just add that around July of this year I also gave my male clothes to Goodwill, a U.S. thrift store, the exact date is probably somewhere in my blogs.

Hugs,
Marsha

Hi Sarah Ann,

Your post caught my eye, and I simply had to chime in.

I had been doing the "en femme" outings with some of my very best crossdressing girlfriends for quite some time. Prior to that time, I never actually expected to ever follow through and actually transition. I had suspicions that there was more to it than I was ready to accept, but then one night....

We had gone out to for the evening, I don't remember all the particulars, but I do remember that it had been a glorious night out. We had probably gone out to dinner to one of our favorite TG-friendly upscale restaurants; next to either a concert or a play, then to our favorite night club for drinks and dancing. (And there was always a huge turnout on the dance floor, especially for "Girls Just Want to Have Fun"!)

I finally got home, kicked off the high heels, stripped off the party clothes, and began to remove the makeup when it hit me; I simply couldn't do this anymore, that is, going back to "drab-mode". Looking into the mirror, and seeing 'him' come back to take over my life again, I just couldn't bear it; I collapsed into a heap on the floor, drowning in my own tears.

That's when I knew.

In my eyes I've been transitioning all my life. My mail life was part of that process because although I believed I was female I had to live the male life. Whenever I could I became the female me but often had to revert to my birth gender for the usual reasons.
The part of that transitioning that is more memorable is when I started my Real Life Experience. That started after my first appointment with the local consulting psychiatrist.
I'm fortunate that for the last two months I've been post-op and I'm now physically the female I always wanted to be.
I'm now in the next chapter of my life.

Well girls, Avery and I support one another in our quest for a better life. we live not too far from each other and we share several experences.
I sort of came out during the summer of 1994. I had an interest in a boat repair shop when I ran acrossa paper that had an interview with two different trans people in it. One caught my eye as she was a licenced clinical Therapist at the local Free clinic. Even before I had read the story, I had been sitting on the fence as to weither I should come out. Actually, id been out kind of back in 1992. I would go to a co workers house where she was a part time professional hair dresser. She would help with make up and do a fabulous job of my hair! She really could make me look like a different person . I only wish I had more photo graphs of those times too. I would have to say that between the two women, they helped me decide that I was much more than a cross dresser. From that point onward, it's been a real slow ordeal as I suffer from a couple of medical ailment s that preclude me taking hormones. I was advised since I have these things, It would be prudent that I not take hormones. Meanwhile, I dress as feminine as I can . I go to church usually in a skirt suit and generally during the week, Im dressed in slacks , flats and minimal make up. Meanwhile, Im trying desperatly to restart a T G group in Richmond at the local Metropolitian Comunity Church where im very much accepted. I relly want top help the younger people out there to have a safe place to go and see that they dont have to suffer in shame such as I did for years. Im so thankful I was able to leave my addictions too. Penny , my first therapist was very ins trumental in bringing me out too, thank you Penny where ever you are today. Ellen Shaver

All of my decisions have been based with my daughter in mind and my need for income. My first step was to come out to the closest family and friends. My biggest worry was my daughters mum because I want the best life I can give my daughter. I was so relieved when the mum turned out to be educated and intelligent.

I have changed my name by deed poll and I can often be seen walking round asda in female jeans a t-shirt, sandals showing of my painted toenails and sporting a week’s growth on the face lol, you’ll be happy to know I have recently started laser to treat my moustache problem.

I hope to start hormone treatment before the year is out. My next steps are to tell my dad and to tell customers, I have told one customer already and he said it don’t matter who I am as long as I do the work. Can’t say fairer than that.

To air my experiences, the non-discrimination act, my liberties as a free person and the freedom to be the individual I am and live my life the way I see fit, I am pleased to say I have not had one incidence from any terrorist or nazi wishing to take my freedom away from me. I am pleasantly surprised considering my preconceptions and everything I have heard from other individuals. I just wanted to state this point, didnt mean to go off the subject.

Love penny x

I'd been openly living as female in my quiet little hamlet where eevryon eknew about me but I felt the need to transition fully and then one day I ha dto go to the postbox in fem mode and got no hassle form all the rush hour trafiic..so I thought 'Wow I can do it' and I did just that from that da y on...and threw out all the male stuff.