Greetings everyone!

See, I've been a cross-dresser for a few years now... But it seems like its not enough for me... I dont truly feel as a woman stuck in a man's body, but at the same time, I dont feel at ease as a man, and a part of me tells me that it would be better for me to go on another step by taking hormones. But if I was ever to, how should I approach my parents with such thing... I don't fear their reaction all that much, my parents are the kind of people who are very understandable. My mother might freak a little, though... and I'd like it to be as gentle as possible on her.
By the way, I'm 20 years old, I live at my grand-parents (due to work and school being closer to their place in Montreal.) I know it will freak THEM out though, so I'm looking at the possibility of moving from there first to not shock them too much.

I would also appreciate information about different type of hormonal treatments if at all possible! Or maybe extensive explanation of how it might work out on me, or get information to know where I should start looking to know that!

I've only put myself as ''admirer'' because I only saw transgenders / family of TG / and admirers, but then maybe I checked too fast...

I clearly can tell I enjoy cross-dressing. But its not feeling like its enough anymore. Something is pushing me to go a step beyond, what ever it may be.

Perhaps you could say people are born transgender much like people say you are born homosexual... But from my life experience, happenings in your life can change one's view on different things and shape the way they end up to be.

Is EVERY transgender here a born TG? Or did some of you find their desire to come later on?

Dont get me wrong, I didnt get this spark randomly only a week ago, it's been a reccurent desire of mine ever since I was younger and discovered transgenderism, with the internet.

I used to get excited sexually yes, by looking at myself in the mirrow, but close to how it is when I look at myself in the mirror naked, and touch myself and I'm not dressed up as a female... But most of all I feel pretty. What actually turns me on the most, is being looked at. May that be at the bus stop, or when I walk around the gay town, when ever people look at me, it turns me on... While as a man, when I get looked upon, I often feel uncomfortable, sometimes annoyed.

I'll take your advice and make a new account though. As it would make sense, I go by the name Smuuglie when I'm dressing up.

I'd have to have that I prefer dressing slutishly, as it makes men look at me even more... I do have bra pads, but I dont enjoy them because -I- know that they're fake, and it bothers me greatly... i'd rather have smaller real breasts that I could feel as my own.

Even in the optic where someone might WANT to become something he isnt, due to the fact that he desires it?
The fact that it turns me on to dress as a woman could only prove that I feel a lot more at ease being a woman... Because I dont get turned on from dressing as a woman, I get turned on from watching myself in the mirror, taking time to look at myself as a woman, much like when I look at myself in the mirror and see myself as a man...But seeing myself as a man does not feel as right.

I see where you are getting at though, one shouldnt feel excited for just being dressed as he or she would normally dress. But one thing has to be taken in consideration. The only female clothes I have, are extremely sexual... So does it not make sense that it turns me on, as I am very interested in both women and man?

I guess the way I have gotten to feel the need to be a woman, differs from most, but could still be viable from what I understand.
Its about being who you are, but what about being what you want to be? I guess it just makes the process of truly being sure more crucial...

Are we born TG/TS?

Actually I believe we are since how can we feel a certain way about ourselves from an early age (6-7) when we haven't yet been educated in the 'social norms' or know anything about transgenderism. These feelings have been with me all my life and have only grown stronger despite my trying to repress them several times.

I think that while you can choose to be TV or CD, you have absolutely no choice about being TS.

Nikki

Martin.
being turned on by dressing is really common among TG people but if its only just started then its not likely you areTS.

And lots of young people with healthy sex drives and NORMAL hormones get turned on by the sight of themselves naked so that is no indicator of gender.

TS 'KNOW' from pre-puberty that we aren't normal and we have to learn to hide it. Pre-pubert dressing is quite thrilling in the sense that we know that that is how we should be dressing but can't so any chance we get to crossdress is very definitely thrilling but being pre-puberty it can't be sexual can it?

Then if post-pubertal crossdressing thrill combines with natural sex drives then it is the 'transvestic phase' that so many psychos prattle on about.

Don't go any further in your life without getting an opinion from a specialist of some sort - psycho or some sort of person who will have had experience of helping youngsters out.
College counsellor should be able to point you in the right direction?

Have a read of www.mtfransition.com to see if you can find yourself in one of the categories described there.