hey,

well i was wondering on some tips about coming out?
my parents have been against it in the past but i dont know how to break it to them that i am a crossdresser.
should i also start wearing more feminine clothes out in public? like not underneath?

well any suggestions and thoughts would be accepted greatly,

bianca

Hi Bianca

I would find it difficult to tell my parents, i think it would be easier to tell a close friend first.

Thats what i did, and that friend has helped me so much in the past two months.

As well as joining this site !!!

Paula x

First of all, welcome to TW. You should be able to find lots of tips on looking your best here in the TW forums. Maybe it is just your choice of words but it sounds like your parents already know you crossdress so maybe you can clarify that. Your profile says you are 19 so I am guessing you still live at home and want to first gain acceptance with your parents about your crossdressing. One of the first things you may want to do is to do some research on crossdressing and find information that you can provide your parents to let them know this is not some perverted activity but rather a documented condition regarding your gender identity. Scouring the TW forums and other sites like http://www.tsroadmap.com/index.html and https://drjenspage.com/ should help you there. Otherwise I don't believe in a "shock" treatment where you overwhelm those you are telling while dressed. I believe their mind wanders trying to digest what they are viewing rather than listening to what you have to say.

As for dressing more in public. A good way to start is wearing women's clothing that is similar to men's like jeans and polo tops. There are subtle differences that most men are clueless to pickup on and women with an eye can spot. It comes down to what you are after in all this, do you want to blend in or standout?

Best wishes,
Marsha

Hi Paula,

At first it was hard for me to come out since I didn't know how my mother would react knowing her son loves to cross dress and feels like a woman trapped in a mans body. What I did first was talk to my brother since I knew he would understand me then eventually I came out and told my mother my true feelings about the joy of crossing dressing and how I feel like a woman on the inside. Of course she didn't agree with the fact that I feel this way but at the same time she understood my feelings very well and now I feel I have become closer with her even more then before. Now she supports my feelings and choice of crossing dressing and feeling like a woman and I love her with all my heart.

Ashley

Hiya Bianca xXx

Firstly welcome to TW.

I note you say cross dresser, Whilst I certainly have nothing against cross dressers, Honest, Do you have the need or feel you want to be a full time woman? That is one hell off a question to answer, I ask, because it can make a difference to how you go about the rest of your life.

If you want to be a part time female appearing publicly, or a full time female, the risks of estrangement are more or less the same. Losing freinds and upsetting family. Part time, you will probably have freinds that won't even want to associate with you even when you appear in public as a male, they would probably be guilty of suffering an embessment complex. Some people manage their lives very well doing this, quite a few are members here.
Only you can weigh up the risks involved. I know from personal experience that family are subject to bigotry because of ignorance, and realy think it would be a lot worse for a part timer, in that people are constantly reminded of your two selves. ''There goes the father/mother of that weird gender bender, the geezer bird'' If its just predeliction for dressing to satisfy a sexual thing or wether its just somthing that makes you feel confortable. If its the latter, I suggest you realy think it out before you do anything, If you are gender dysphoric then that need overides everything. Living full time people do come to accept you eventually. You can explain educate them, people are less understanding about the casual cross dresser who they see walking down the road on a Monday in a suit and a dress and heels on a Tuesday.

A lot of people tend to forget the impact on how other people see the family and SO's of the trans person. it affects their freinds, it should'nt but it does sometime reflect on them as parents being seen as accepting somthing so weird even perverted and unatural.

If its just a casual thing, at the moment perhaps it would be wise to keep it hidden till you decide just what you are. Do you live on your own? You can still meet similar people and go to trans freindly clubs. All I am saying, be careful, before you risk aliemating everyone you hold dear to you.


Cristine xXx