Thanks Jayne

I will. Today I go and change my bank account and tomorrow I set myself in the municipal rental flat line. Hope to get a flat soon because of my divorce in process. It usually helps to skip the line a bit.
This month´s salary will still go through the old account. Luckily I have some extra income from my private architectural design. And I seem to keep my customers in spite of my transition. They don´t care as long as they like my design results. And they love them.
I have got much support friendliness and smiles from strange people and that makes me believe the world is not that bad at all.

hugs

Laura

Hi girls

My life must have a turn to better...worse it cannot get. I must find a place for myself, must move away from the horror. I must change my bank account, that my SO cannot just take all my money out and say...well there´s no money. She gives me 5 euro for the daily food...sometimes nothing at all.
Yesterday she put me down in front of close relatives...in so cruel way...that I still burst into tears when I remember it. My daughter and my brother in law are my only support among the relatives.
I must start my own life and have the piece of mind I should have. Today I feel already much stronger...these people will not get me down! I know who I am and they cannot change that.

Laura

Laura, dear:

In the States, what you are going through is called "cruelty" in polite society. A better term for it is "abuse."

GET OUT OF THERE! For your own good and your safety...please. Find a safe place to stay, get your bank affairs in order, do whatever you must...but it is time to go while you still can, girl.

Keep us all posted!

Luv 'n supportive hugs,

(Dr.) Jayne Sakura

LAURA ,I HURT FOR YOU & WITH YOU...IF YOU NEED US WE'LL BE HERE FOR YOU....PHYLISS-MARIE

LAURA ,I HURT FOR YOU & WITH YOU...IF YOU NEED US WE'LL BE HERE FOR YOU....PHYLISS-MARIE

Thanks Phyliss, YOU ARE SO SWEET

I´m so happy to have my daughter Emma on my side. The little girl I used to send to school every morning and put to bed with good night kisses every evening is now grown up and stands by me.
And your advice and support is so important to me, I cannot describe it.

hugs to you Phyliss

Laura

Thanks Stevie

Now my SO seems to have changed tactics. First she disappeared without a word for more than 24 hours, then came back with a broad smile, food and wine. I don´t know what this smiley campaign is, but I´m happy anyway. So far she has said no demands or not even wishes...
I cannot help being suspicious, but I guess that is normal after what I have lived through. I don´t think this will last long, but I enjoy this.

hugs

Laura

PLEASE BE CAREFUL...DO NOT TAKE HER BACK!!!!THEN SHE'LL KNOW THAT SHE CAN MANIPULATE YOU AT WILL,AND THINGS WILL BE CALM FOR A LITTLE WHILE,THEN OUT OF THE BLUE THE AGONY STARTS AGAIN..PLEASE,PLEASE, BE CAREFUL.....PHYLISS-MARIE

Laura:

I stand by what I said before: Get out while the getting is good, dear. Phyliss-Marie has the right idea.

Luv 'n supportive hugs,

(Dr.) Jayne Sakura

Thanks to you all

Life has changed back to normal again. Yesterday she tried to make me promise to cut off my connections to you and all other supporting friends. I said I understood what she said, she doesn´t have to repeat it. But I´ll go my way and she cannot change that.
Then she got mad and wanted to have money from me. I said that we discuss the financial matter later on as a part of the divorce and right now I don´t have much. She still has our both salaries under her control. But only until next month. Luckily I have some irregular income from my design tasks.
As I left home early this morning I felt pity on her and left some cash on the kitchen table. I cannot love her any more, but I think she loves me in a queer, obsessive way.
I´ll leave her and move out as soon as possible. Nothing can change that.

hugs

Laura

Please take care Laura in everything you do... it seems your SO is really trying mind games on you... this is gonna hurt both of you in the long run unfortanately... just be careful, and be glad you have some friends here, and your daughter alongside you...

Don't give in to her...

Hugs & love,
Gabrielle

It's good that you have some people in your corner. You have us here, too. I wish you the best!

We don't want to see you get hurt, Laura. The only concept we have of your SO is the one you've painted for us, so we can't really know her as you do. It's possible for individuals to change (we're talking core personalities here), but it's very rare, in my experience.

As the others have said, be careful.

Question: are you still in love with her?
Another one: if not, are you afraid to be without her?
One more: if you are still in love with her, do you think she's in love with you?
O.K., last one: you said she gave you money for food, so does that mean she's always been in control of your finances? I know you mentioned changing the bank account, but I just wondered exactly what you meant. If she's keeping you from eating, that's pretty low.

Either way, I just hope you do what's best for yourself.