"Want A Sexy Shemale?" banner ad from Trannymates.com.

Err, the reason I joined the old TW was to not have to deal with this sort of thing. Another ad a couple of days ago had a nearly naked girl with her ass in the air. I know the site needs the money, but...

How far will this go? And will visitors think we are just another "shemale" "ladyboy" meat market like most other TG sutes?

Best,
Mellie

Thank-you Melody, I was just thinking exactly the same thing. These are terms that I particularly dislike and that advert is a massive own goal! If I wasn't already a member and understood the real ethos of GS than it would definately put me off joining...

Want a Sexy Shemale? Advertisement!

It’s to my shock and disappointment that I saw an advertisement for a “Tranny dating site” leading with the slogan – “Want a SexyShe male?”

2 things I want to make clear –

1. I have no problems with Shemale’s
2. I have no problems with people that want to date Shemale’s

Here is my issue, I have been a member of this site for 8-9 years, and when I have been able to, I have contributed by becoming a fulltime member. I have seen many people come and go, and have heard constant battles of inside politics.

Throughout my time as a member of TW/TGS it has been made clear that this is a site for people to express their views and to be understood by people in similar situations and by those who are from the full spectrum of transgendered variants.

At no time has this site been advertised as a dating site, and in the recent years the staff here have told us at great length of the efforts to loose, the seedy tags that are associated with people who do not understand that just because some one expresses themselves in a less than obvious gender role that they are doing it for sex, sexual gratification or to make themselves more attractive to gay people who are in the closet. (no offence intended to anyone who is gay)

I have seen many of my friends leave this site because the word “gender” was in the title, which makes sense as many people who cross-dress for fun/hobby/relaxation or even kink factor are not at odds with their gender, and lets face it “the Gender Society” does have an official sounding name.

So why do the good people who administrate this site now feel that it is appropriate to sell advertising space to the people that draw all of the wrong conclusions to our outlook? And where will you stop at trying to making a fast buck?

Answers please, because I don’t think I can be a member of such a place.
:(

Tracey Taylor.

I was a bit surprised to see the advert too.... I'm just hoping that it doesn't attract the 'wrong' sort of admirer to the site. That can be a pain, (or maybe it is a cunning plan to attract potential 'wrong' sort of admirers away from the site and towards 'Tranny Dating' or whatever it is called! lol)

...to direct the people who were more interested in that sort of thing away from the Gender Society.

Why? Surely those oddbods who want that sort of thing would quickly note this isn't that sort of site. Having this appalling type of advert simply makes it look like we condone - indeed promote - the sleazyification of being transgendered.

I didn't say you were condoning them, Cristine ...

I am really shocked and disappointed at this thread much like everyone who has posted their feelings, in fact, i had to read it several times to believe my eyes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

not once has anyone mentioned or even asked what the price of the advertised shemale is whilst also failing to ask if you get a discount if you buy in multiples are even if a buy two and get a third free option is available.

dear oh dear oh dear, what is the world coming tooo!

jokes a side. there are plenty of unscrupulous capitalists who are more than happy to make exploitative profits in the sex trade at the expense of tragic human circumstances and there are plenty of people happy to spend quantities of cash replacing their lack of good looks, charisma and charm in the pursuits of sexual gratification. lets celebrate that people have the freedom to chose those pursuits.

however....

in every transphobic crime made against me, the line of attack has always been aimed at my sexual practices, ie being called a wierdo, pervert, paedophile and so on. to which i can only consider that the aforementioned advertising helps to fuel and i am really surprised that this website has approved.

i would be very happy for the sex trade and transgender community to be completely divorced but as i found at recently when i visited the way out club in london, there were many prostitutes who classed themselves as pre-op transsexuals and I was also propositioned for someone to pay me 70 quid to suck my c0ck to which i point blankly refused. I cant possibly imagine that any transsexual would endure let alone enjoy receiving a blowj0b.

i am happy for people to have the freedom to live as they please. I just wish people were given sufficient education, maybe at school, clearly depicting the difference between sexuality, transgendered people and the sex trade and that the 3 are completely separate until any individual and only that individual decides to combine them.

rant over
xxxxx

Who's DUMB ASS idea was it to have this " want a sexy she-male" banner here. Things are hard enough with trying to get society to be more accepting of TG peeps so we sure as hell DONT WANT & DONT NEED ads like this cos it puts us in a bad light and i sure as HELL am not having that......it aint fair


Anna Marie ( very p*ssed off) xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Can't somebody do the INTELLIGENT thing & remove the damn banner????


Anna-Marie xx

" ...there were many prostitutes who classed themselves as pre-op transsexuals and I was also propositioned for someone to pay me 70 quid to suck my c0ck to which i point blankly refused. ..."

This sort of thing does confuse me a tadge, Penny. After 18 months on HRT I have zero sex drive nor any interest in physical hoo-har. I would have assumed other pre-op TG's would be similar. Perhaps not ...

Well, my sex drive just won't leave me alone, but that doesn't mean I want to put my c0ck somewhere. But when I'm all panting and in heat, the last thing I want is to have that stupid thing touched. It's like a magic spell and it's broken if that thing is messed with. That's why I don't do hookups with guys anymore. "Shemale" is a word used by the pr0n industry. I think they hurt the girls who work for them. Because, although there are men who change their bodies to make tons of money in their business, there are trans girls in the business, too. They are being asked to do things that run contrary to who they are. And that, to me, is tragic.

Thanks Katie for the clarification. One of the reasons I came to Gender Society (GS) was to try and stay away from the adult porn sites that seam to drift closely with the transgendered community and try to work their way into the good sites. That appearance of the porn industry has bled off on us and at times has given us a bad reputation. Over the years we as TG/TS/CDs (oh how I hate titles) have tried to educate society that we are people just like them, just born a little different. We have tried to educate society that we contribute to society just as they do and that all we ask for is understanding just as they would. I am glad that GS has taken action to remove the site in question and hope that GS holds to it principals and not allow other such sites sneak in. I also hope that GS will strive to continue to present the proper image of who we are. Thanks again for taking car of this issue.

To all the Girls, I ditto all the comments already made in this forum. They all are good, but Katie is right. Slip ups do happen but we should all stick together and make these issues known as soon as they develop to avoid any ill issues. This forum was a good thing. It drew attention to an issue that needed correcting. Thank goods we have members that are not afraid to speak up when that see something that appears as not right and thank goodness we have administrators that also see the issues and take action.

Thanks to all and hopefully other sites such as the one being discussed will no be an issue again.

Thanks!!

XXX

Ginger Motes

Hi Katie,

Sorry about the Trannymates/Trannydates mistake. Only a single letter difference and I missed it.

When I posted this thread, I thought someone at TGS had approved the advert. I didn't realize GS Ad Network vendors were on an "honor system" to self-identify their own objectionable ads. As I said, this was the second inappropriate ad I'd seen in the last few days. I now know I should have e-mailed you.

Like doing away with mod approval of pics, I'm apprehensive about this send an e-mail after a problem is posted on all our public pages. ("OMG, I didn't know a man could do THAT with his...")

Maybe I'm over sensitive to this issue. While researching for a feature on the new site you asked me to do, I went to many, many TG sites (more than I ever knew existed) and there is some pretty raw stuff out there, much of it in banner ads.

Best,
Mellie

ps, I have no objection to TG dating ads that follow the standards we have come to expect from TGS. I'm not personally interested in them, but don't mind them either.

Thanks to Anna Marie for bringing this to Katie’s attention.
Thanks to Katie for dealing with this situation so swiftly
And thanks to everyone for taking the time to post their feelings on this issue.

I have never threatened to leave this site before and it is not my intention to do it every time I throw my toys out of the pram, that said, I am happy with the out come and I am looking forward to the launch of the new site!!!

Huggs ,

x ACE x

:)

Katie, had assumed you'd already been contacted and didn't want to duplicate. Happy to do so in the future.

Clearly I am in the minority of minorities in having an HRT imposed sex ban...

Sorry, but one may as well rail at the moon as think that people, especially men, are ever going to see transgendered women in any way other than as an interesting alternative sexual option. This is the default position, at least in my experience.

I personally like the term "she-male" in itself, and feel it exactly describes what I am much more clearly and precisely than much of the other terminology on offer. Unfortunately, the term has an almost total association with a particularly nasty type of pornography. I wouldn't even mind if "she-male" had just mild sensual erotic connotations, but unfortunately it doesn't. Maybe it's time to reclaim the term "she-male" back from the cynics.

Hi all .
Don't get concerned i am not hanging around as i know i am not a liked person on this site and as my full membership has lapsed after just a few weeks use in that year and i am not the type of person who expects anything in life for free this is just a flying visit.
I was reading this thread from the outside and felt i had to log in and comment as i had already pointed this problem out to Katie last year with a porn site banner on the home page , this must have been about 7 months ago as i recieved an automated email from the site about 5 months ago saying i had not logged in for 3 months and i was missed ( that i did laugh at ).

Anyway there is right now yet another porn site add on the home page and me being the observant sod i am have noticed something when i clicked on it and that i cannot tell you about but after this i will be sending a personal email to someone .

I would like to wish you all of you the best for the future and that even includes the person who kicked me while i was down after my very close friend was killed by an IED whilst serving in Afganistan fighting in another countries war.

Back to now , the porn sites will always infiltrate any place they can as its a money maker (not for the UK)
Anyway i better go and write my email and leave all of you in peace.

Last December an artical was published about me you may or may not be interested in so i will put a link below but please remember giving the artical the thumbs down is hurting the Author and not me as she is a student please do not try to hurt her to get at me .



I don't think this is allowing me to put the link up don't matter.

You all take care and look after yourselves and each other and i truely mean that Julia x.

Hi Katie.
Thanks for the welcome back but how ever much i want to be a part of and contribute financialy to your exellent site its not likely to happen , i have no problems with the money side but as you may remember i am hated by a few other members mainly because i tell it like it is and the truth hurts some .I will be the first to addmit i have posted things i maybe could have worded better but if i get provoked by strangers i retaliate , i do not put up with it in real life and will not put up with it on the internet , i have spent a lot of my time and money helping my local police force and hate crime service to put a stop to the hate.

As for the current banner i know it looks ok from the outside but i joined it to investigate it, i payed the money for 1 month and to put it bluntly it is discusting and demeaning to transgendered people of any kind . I was a member for less than 48 hours and deleted my profile but before i did i sent a very discusting man on a round trip of over 200 miles to a place i have never heard of to meet me whilst i was at home with one of my old mobile phones giving him directions from a map, i would have deleted my account before 48 hours but i just wanted his response the next day and for some strange reason he was not very pleased with me niether was his wife pleased with him.

I know that 99.9% of your members are decent people and i realy wished that people would have taken the time to get to know me before knocking me .

The link is http://www.thefounder.co.[...]g-body/ you can put it up somewhere if you wish or it can be googled the founder born in the wrong body and it comes up first , proberbly as it is read by students all over the country .

Again i am asking nicely to anyone reading the artical please not to give it the thumbs down as it will not hurt me it will be hurting the author and she realy doe's not deserve that as she is a realy nice person who took the trouble to track me down and do the artical as she cares and is only a student with a bright future.

You take care look after yourself and keep up the good work you are doing as i do know that you have everyones interest at heart and i also know the lengths other websites will go to to get paying members.
Hugs and all the best Julia x.
PS your frock magazine link doe's not work either.

Julia,

The only reason I ever gave you any crap at all was because of your never ending America bashing. I have nothing against you personally, but you paint all of us with a single brush stroke. When you do that, you are very likely to receive the same kindness in return. There are many Americans that I'd like to put in thumbscrews, but the whole country? Maybe you should re-think your myopic tendencies. Just a thought.

Thanks Katie for taking care of that Problem

danni

Can I make a sugestion? Lets just do away with the adds all together & aleviate this problem all together. I know that this is the easy way out but it would save a lot of trouble in the long run & money too I know but... In trying to stay respectible well I think theis would be the best way to do it.

This is to Julia who said you wen't liked here? We always try to be friendly here so if you did something well that I can understand. I'm not on much however when I am well I'm hardly ever in chat I stick to the fourm mostly.

 

Well then maybe insted of the honer system like we have now all adds must be approved by some one committed to keeping this site respectable? Its the only other I can think of advertising I know is a huge marketing tool, for us & them both that I ralize. Anyone with any other sugestions please let Katie know or us here so we can talk about it. There HAS to be a way we can keep adult adds at bey while keeping our good add & keep opperating.

Ok sounds like you on top of things Katie its just sugestions & Ideas is all

I wish to reply to Rae's comment about my experience in the London night club but unsure whether it is ok to continue here or start a new thread. Anyway...

 

I totally agree Rae with your comment. I was taken aback when supposed pre-op transsexuals were trading gay sex. For me, the hormones have caused the thing between my legs to shrivel up and die, which makes life a lot easier. The other thing which confuses me is that I havent yet met a single pre-op transsexual diagnosed with gender dysphoria and undergoing hormone treatment who would even contemplate sexual acts with their male genitalia let alone perform gay sexual acts in the male role which to me would be completely contrary to the person I am.

 

It makes me wonder what some people consider what a transsexual is. I find it frustrating when I consider myself a fairly normal person and others perceive me a purely an object of sexual gratification.

While I'm perhaps reviving an old thread, I'm glad I followed through this topic to the end. Let me quote something here I felt good to identify with as I continue my journey of discovery...
"The other thing which confuses me is that I haven't yet met a single pre-op transsexual diagnosed with gender dysphoria and undergoing hormone treatment who would even contemplate sexual acts with their male genitalia let alone perform gay sexual acts in the male role which to me would be completely contrary to the person I am."
This post was edited by M G at April 26, 2014 10:00 AM BST

Yep, I understand that Katie...I should have made myself more clear. My post was really more about how I had found the discussion within the thread helpful, regardless.

I hope that makes sense.

 

Madeleine : )