What it’s like to be a man pt.2

                                                      By Cole Smith

There are a lot of things I didn’t touch on in my frock article about being a man however there is a need to discuss a few things. It takes a lot to be transgendered no matter if you’re going FTM or MTF. You’ll need thick skin, courage, and determination to become the person you really are and deal with a lot of the backlash you’ll receive from people until you get where you’re going. Most of this is going to be for the FTM’s however some of it anyone can use.

I’m going to break a lot of things down into certain categorizes and then have sub categories within that. I’ll bold each category so you’ll know when it stops. Also note I will probably be adding to this for some time as there is no way I can finish this entire guide in one sitting so please don’t bash it just yet.  

Passing

Hair: For all FTM’s a haircut can make or break us in passing. Don’t use the same person you were going to before you decided to start presenting male. Really don’t go back to them if they thought you were a lesbian before as they will unintentionally give you a feminized version of anything you ask for unless they are very open minded. Also stay away from any bangs or pointed side burns. Now you may wonder why can I not have long side burns? Well you can if you really want them but if you get a short back and side cut please lose the side-burns. It’s a dead giveaway.

Shaving: A lot of people are going to ask you why are you shaving if you’re not on T? Or they’ll you if you’re already on T but no facial hair. The main answer is this: Women have “peach fuzz” men do not. Plain and simple if you’re pass the puberty age then you need to get rid of the peach fuzz and please pay close attention to your upper lip. A lot of young FTM’s miss this area and yes if a girl gets close enough she will notice. A nice razor, some warm water to open the pores and shaving cream with slow downward strokes is quick and easy.

Clothing: This is my biggest pet peeve honestly. I really want to say use your best judgment in this area but with this whole “skinny” jean fade/guy’s in girls jean thing going on its kind of annoying to see a newly out FTM out dressing. Basically I’m going to break it down for you like this. Take every piece of female clothing you have and get rid of it or at least get it away from your male clothes. You cannot mix and match if you’re not already passing easily. Wearing a male shirt and girl’s jeans is not a fashion style you can get away with at the moment. Also please wear clothes that fit you. Yes you want a shirt that is a little loose however you do not need to be in pants or jeans that are falling off your ass. If you have a bottom that is too big for you then you’re going to cause yourself more problems with not only trying to take the focus off your shape (Hips, thighs) you’ll also bring focus to your height unless you were truly blessed.

Packing: This is a touchy subject for me because I pack for myself. I don’t pack to pass or to impress some girl I do it for myself. It makes me stand a little taller. Feel a little more like the man I want to be. The only real rule to packing is simply don’t go overboard about it. Packing is about giving a natural look of a soft penis. You don’t need to run out and get a 7’ packy to feel like a man. 2-3’ packy is the most you will need for a soft pack guys. You don’t need to look like you’re hard all the time.

Voice/Mannerisms: Guys talk in a monotone style while women use “upward inflection.” You really want to focus on what you have to say not what you want to say. As men we don’t get as enthusiastic as women about things so watch your tone and careful about hand gestures. Now as far as mannerisms; women tend to be less intrusive while we as men take up a lot of space.

Bathroom: Go in, do your business, wash your hands and walk out. It’s that easy guys. If you look around or act jumpy you only bring attention to yourself. Men are not social nor do we pay attention to anything you’re doing while in the bathroom. Don’t make eye contact, don’t try to look at anyone’s junk just do what you came to do. Even men sit down sometimes so if you don’t stand just yet don’t feel bad.

The last thing I want to say about passing is that people see what they want to see. If you feel confident in yourself as a man people will read that and see you as a man. If you doubt yourself and are always scared of being caught you’re going to project that. Confidence is the key in passing for anyone.

Binding

Get a real binder or use a homemade one but for the love of all that is holy do not use duct tape or ace bandages. Homemade binders are the easiest thing in the world to make. You can use a pair of bike shorts/compression shorts that you cut the legs/middle off of then roll it down over your chest. Over top of that you can put on a tight sports bra. This will make you flat and it’s only like 15/20$ to make. Now if you can get a real binder please do but remember no more than 8-10hrs wearing a binder without a break. Another important point is before you do any binding cough to loosen up anything in your lungs. This is to protect you from getting walking pneumonia which can kill you.

Dating:

T.B.A

General Acceptance:

T.B.A