So!

I`ve been thinking about the differences between us.

How i like to dress as a girl. How I enjoy the feel of girls

clothes & underwear. The style of girls shoes, & boots.

Yes I`m a transvestite. To say I get a sexual thrill out of it.

Is over simplifying it. If that was just the case. I`d have stopped

years ago. So there is a drive within me to dress as a girl. In my

teenage years, knowing nothing of other transvestites, & seeing

the likes of Danny La Rue. It confused & bothered me. As pretty much

any cross dressers in the public eye. Did also happen to be gay.

So obviously, not having the sophistication of thought, I like to think

I have today. I thought i may be gay. Which I discovered one drunken night,

that I wasn`t. All the same, the drive to dress. Both worried & confused me.

What the hell was I? I`m not gay, I love women, but only gays & weirdo`s

wanted to dress as a woman. It was actually my aunt & uncle, who gave me & my

new bride. A book of relationships, for young married couples. That helped a great

deal. It encouraged couple to accept & experiment, in role play & various forms of

dressing. (both he & she) My 1st wife, while not fan of me dressing did try, by allowing me

to wear underwear & stockings during lovemaking. It wasn`t a regular thing, & never escalated

to us being sisters, & me being dressed completely as a girl in her company. Anyway, we married very young both 18yr old. So it was never going to last, & although we still remain

friends. She is the only one of my loves ever to see me in female clothes. So now by this time I`d started reading books such as forum, & there certainly seemed to be a lot of men who dressed as women in the stories. they were usually sex driven stories. Also female domination,

where men were forced into womens clothes & humiliated. Which, although tittilating, still wasn`t me. (don`t get me wrong, if any of my loves had wanted to try this, I`d have jumped at the chance to try it at least) So again, what the hell was i? During the early 90s, I came across a mothly magazine. Called the "tranny guide" It had many features & articals, on transvestism. It also opened my eyes to the transexual community. There were places to go to buy womens clothes. Places to go dressed, & places to go to dress. It was for me a great mag. As it gave facts & figures, & varying opinions about the diversity of the transgender community. Which helped me come to terms with my hobby so to speak. I discovered, I was not so strange. Not so weird., Not a sexual devient. I was just a fella, who wanted for a number of reasons. To on occasion, dress as a girl. I do try to look as convincing as possible, when I do,

becouse I try my best at everything I do. I also came to terms, with the fact that I like me as me. Which is both Him & her! I`m happy in either role. I`m probably most comfortable as a boy, but I`m also exactly the same person as a girl. A RG friend of mine, who has me me as Daisy. Said "you are no different at all" Which I`m happy about. I love women, I love how they look, smell, their bodies, their clothes, shoes, & make up. For me these days, when I dress. It generally is to relieve stress, & just worry about the shallow things like. does my bum look big in this? (if only!) have I got my make up right, & I hope these boobs don`t fall out of the bra.

Finding this site, has been a god send for me. I`ve made friends here. Mainly TS girls, but also some lovely transvestites. We have all arrived here through different journeys. We all have different stories. I`m a transvestite, but my transvestism, isn`t always gonna be for the same reasons or emotions as others. I`m proud to be a member of GS, even though I`m never gonna be political about it or hate the Transgender haters. This is my journey, & I`m taking my own route. I`m here to make friends, & would love for you girls to share your journey or a much of it as you want to reveal. I`ve only given brief highlight, or low lights. Depending on perspective................ Love Daisy

No arguement there Crissie. We are all human, & we all have different needs. Which was the long winded point of my post. I was giving my journey, & some of the concerns I`d had. I could`ve just said, shall we share our stories....

thank you darling

My journey is like all of ours in the sense that it is an ongoing evolution. Beyond that I find myself to only be a girl in my heart, my mind, my soul / lifeforce / any other term one would like to use for the inner being we each speak and see ourselves from in the universe. It took a long time for me for a few reasons - one the inability to explore - two, the fear - with each passing thought or feeling, I quickly banished it to a bubble which only grew over time - to the point where it finally burst last year - when standing in front of a mirror in the dress - the one I have as a profile pic - I realized it is indeed me through and through. Even when not in the clothes I continually see myself as the girl I am. Growing up I did a lot of 'girl' things - baking cookies with my mom, wearing her shoes, wanting to shave my legs and do my nails, wanting to go to the girls locker room in gym class wishing that once I stepped over the threshold I too would be a girl, playing with dolls and making clothes for them, when reading the newspaper I naturally gravitated to columns written by women and never read the sports. A third reason is long ago I decided to define 'me' by what I do and not who I am - in doing so, I could avoid gender altogether - in fact my mental image was presented as androgynous - since shopping in the women's section was frowned upon, though secretly I longed to. I finally found a pair of slides that I bought and use as slippers and everyday shoes and they are women's shoes and no one was the wiser - by now some 15 years later and buying and purging clothes several times over, I finally realize who I am - a girl at heart all the time. I see your point, Daisy about weirdos and gays only - in fact when one thinks of it - people who crossdressed were seen in the movies and TV as one of 3 things - gay ( the one you note ), psychopaths ( Micheal Caine, Anthony Perkins ), or comedians ( Milton Berle ) - I am none of the 3. I turn out to be rather asexual. I like women as friends - ones I can talk to, learn from, and be gal-pals with - I do not want to be the guy at all. My clothes in the last few months are mostly girls jeans, unisex tops, and either my slides or cute purple canvas sneakers to avoid any and all confrontations - with time to just be, then I pull out a nice top and my flats or my favorite wedges and long skirt. Many other avenues showed me my being - I write fiction and my deepest characters are all women and are me in one form or another - once long ago I contemplated writing a book to publish - a cook book as written by one of my female characters and not even in my given name. Presently, I operate a website with loads of activities for those who like science and math - more than a dozen of the articles of the 40+ pieces on it with names on them have my now chosen name of Briana - just did this as of Jan 1 this year. In essence I have come out - so far no family member or friend has noticed it - I have all of 2 - 3 friends anyway. When I finally asked myself 'who am I' and examined my thoughts and feelings from the perspective of gender - it is then and there all the dots of thoughts and memories in my life come together and make sense when I place one piece in the center of the puzzle of my life - that of me being a girl, the woman I am. The journey within was enlightening and balancing for me - now it is time to continue the journey in the everyday world - this site has been instrumental in that - to find I am normal in being me - I needed to come here to communicate with others - to post pictures - only those here are the only people in all the universe who know my secret and have seen these photos. There are other dimensions to my tale - many of them addressed here are on other bogs I wrote with some other components as well. Many new epiphanies through time. It has been very helpful to be here. I thank each and everyone here I encounter. I explore who I am here and am myself. Thank you Daisy for your tale and your journey. All the best to you in where it is and where it takes you. Hugs, Briana : )

Thank you Briana.
for sharing darling

Hi Daisy

 

We haven't spoken much and maybe that's a subconscious awareness of the difference between us.

But thanks for having the courage to post your item.

Your item has pushed more of my own identity into my foremind.

We are, you and I, different.  

 

I am not a dresser, because I am driven more towards body scuplting.

My thing is to reveal my body from under my clothes, whether they are male clothes or female clothes.

I like to see my small perky breasts through close fitting tops and jumpers.

I am looking forward to wearing pants with a smooth crutch which will be possible after my orchiectomy.

So to me, clothes are arbitrary.

I have long seeked the female form, naked and 'aflame' 

 

However, one thing we have in common is a positive regard for TGS, which is particularly due to the catalyst of a certain administrator.

Or maybe my perspective is coloured, and just blind to the contributions of others.  

 

Anyway thanks for the post, my ideas were always there but you helped to put them into words.

 

Chalice