380 posts and 51 threads started by me and these are my final words "There will be no response".

For reasons I am not willing to discuss and now will not be able to these are my final words.

I have done what I can only say is my best , but I seemed to have failed . So what is my best? Most of you will never understand that is why it has to be this way.

I have tried over and over not to change any of you or your ideals but to see it through my eyes , looking through my eyes is no bad thing! I see a lot of good. My life has been no bed of roses or a walk in the park , but it has been one hell of a journey , I have shared part of that journey with you and even at times bared my heart and soul and for what? To give you a reason and a purpose . I know at times I sound harsh but it is sometimes the only way I can get my point accross . In reality I am not harsh  , only on myself at times.

So what is my point? Well there are many to be honest and it all comes back to the same old thing Being yourself is not a crime In actual fact it is the most natural thing in the world to be yourself .Bieng Trans! Being trans is not a crime That to is natural! We are all a part of this big mixed up world where nothing is perfect , and believe me I am far from perfect. Life is for living though not hiding away , I have nothing to hide from and I can see no need for it. Can a black person paint themselves white? Yes but why would they? they have pride and the paint would just wash of anyway.

Can you see what I have just written? This is not a perfect world! I am not perfect there is no such effin thing.

You can look at a beautiful person and say they are perfect , they are not though beauty is not perfection , they may be beautiful but have the personality of a house brick , or you could do the opposite and say look there is an ugly person , but they could have a beautiful personality , you can't have everything and you will never ever find perfection it does not exist.

We are Trans and we are human beings just like the next human standing next to you any place you go, is the next person/human ashamed of being themselves? Maybe they are but I would say most are not.

My one aim in life has been to remove that shame , not for myself because I have none but to remove it for others , take away the shame and join in with the rest of the f#cked up human race , they get by ok and just stop one day and take a good look at them No perfection you will not find it .

When I say I have failed I have not failed in the real world , I have failed here though and however harsh I may sound at times it is the way I do it to real people and it bloody works too and I get thanked for it , eventually they see I care.

I have been asked to do something for the BBC next week and you know what? They can find someone else for a change , will they though? I doubt it , well not someone willing to tell it like it is it will be a farce.

I am ending this here because deep down inside of me I know I am just wasting my time , a very small percentage of you understand but the rest its like talking to a brick wall. People have put walls up in front of me all through my journey to become myself and I have knocked everyone of them down I am not perfect I am no different to any other I am just plain me and very proud of it.

@3 Minutes 26 seconds on this upload http://youtu.be/Onvc1AE_mzE  It states  "Take the best and make it better find a way to stay together" I deliberately placed those words over a poor image of the log in page for this website  (it had to be a poor image or youtube would have picked up on it and removed it) . Saying that though , you have the best so you have the ability to make it better , I know my answers in the song I know where I go wrong. Bye now http://youtu.be/L1naxm8ndcc 2 lines in this!! Its tearing my heart and soul in two and Go make it easy on yourself sum this me and some members up. I will miss a lot of you so thank you .

You all take care and feel free to respond as you wish because I will not be responding.

Julia .