Hi girlies!
I happened to post on a profile picture of one of our moderators tonight, saying, how stunningly beautiful she looked (you know who you are! Lol)
Anyhow, a member (you know who you are!) ( so, probably does everybody else haha!) posted a comment that they "didn't give a sh*t" how they looked. Well, after I had stopped laughing (I nearly wet my knickers and had to reach for the tena ladies, which, due to misconceptions, I always thought were "low cost ladies of the night! Lol!) I started seriously thinking about what she had actually said.
In these superficial days of most of us more or less being self conscious of how we look first and foremost, I got to thinking. Are we 180 degrees out on this?
Go back in time, before cameras, mirrors etc. the only way then that anybody could actually see their face was in a pool, and, even then it was a fairly "muddled" reflection.
So, if THEY felt beautiful it would have been the feeling of beauty that came from "within"
Now, going back to when I was young I WAS beautiful as a girl, VERY beautiful (think I could've given Cristine a run for her money lol) but, as time has gone on I am not an oil painting any longer (maybe because I have abused my, body born of frustration of not being born in the "right one")
You will notice that my profile photo is a bunch of lilies because of this! And, believe me...I know it's "total crap!".
So....thanks to this members (former member) members lol! "off the cuff" comments I now know that wether dressed in one of my beautiful dresses with full make-up and heels or not, I still feel one million percent a beautiful, sexy goddam girl! and I ALWAYS WILL IN YEARS TO COME!
Come on girls, just think about this and feel the same....beauty is from "within" and I think this member (former member) member has got this "right on the money" and I would just like to thank her for making me "wake up, and smell the coffee" as it were!
Here is my promise....profile photo within a week!
With love to all, Linda xxxxx

You are spot on sister - beauty always begins with yourself and from within yourself - it is an extension of your first best friend whose acceptance is paramount to all success - that first friend is namely yourself. Looking forward to your picture! : )

Thank you sooo much Briana! Whatever I try to say here really does come from my heart and, so to speak, I really try not to "shoot from the hip" as it were, and just try to say what's on my minds when a "thought" suddenly comes to me....after all, if I don't, at my age I will have totally forgotten it by the morning lol!

Are you talking about me Linda? . I am no oil painting and I am what you get in this world. I have no shame in me and no person ever should.

It can be I know very hard for some people to just say I am me and if you don't like it steer clear. That has to be my attitude in this world. My I don't give a sh*t system works. It works because I really don't . If any person in this world has a problem with me then to me it is their problem not mine. 99% of people just accept the fact I am who I am. The tiny minority who can't can cross the road or look the other way. They have the ability to not come into any form of contact with me what so ever. I have no need to force people to like me because my 99% Suits me fine , the tiny few are just arseh*les with no life.

I am not saying I walk around town or go out looking a mess , I just dress casual unless it is a special occassion. My make up takes me 10 minutes to apply and 3 minute on my hair and I am ready to go. I actually spend more time removing my make up! My face has to be clean or I will get spots. My favourite part of putting my bra on is taking it off! Depending on what I am wearing I prefer not to wear one.

This world is screwed up "I am not" I am just part of the screwed up human race.

 

Take care , Julia xx

Yes, of course I am Julia lol. I like the "what you see is what you get" attitude and the straight talking. It saves a lot of time! xx

I should have added Linda. If it was me that made you piss your knickers then I am pleased you had a good laugh.

In a nut shell I don't give a sh*t what anyone thinks of me.

Going back about three years I was in a studio in Manchester and Cat Deeley asked me to stand next to her. Why would she do that? She is 5ft 9 and I am 5ft 9 , she had 4 inch heels on and I had 4 inch heels on. At the time she was a size 10 and I was a size 10. She asked me to stand next to her because she said she always seems to be the tallest girl in the room. So we both stood there 6ft 1 inch tall side by side. Now she did not give a sh*t about having me at her side. If someone like her does not give a sh*t I think that is a perfect example. We should all just be proud of who we are full stop.

Julia xx

Well it was Julia, and I did! It was an instant reaction to something I didn't expect to see! I mean, there we were all paying lovely Madeleine nice, girly comments and, then, CRASH, BANG WALLOP! in comes Julia with that! It was sort of like Del Boy in only fools falling through the bar or the chandelier falling, or Dorien in birds of a feather sitting on the zed bed and it immediately folding up so you could only see her legs! I love that kind of immediate laugh! I laughed so much that I found it hard to type the reply as my I-pad was on my lap and the keys kept moving! xxx

How you look Crissie makes no odds to me you know that. Since way way back I was amazed by you not the image I could see.

There are some wonderfull people here and in this world. I say at times I look a wreck. I do not care about looks it is the personallity that counts. Some here have the personallity of a house brick.

I show respect to others that show it to me , Crissie has always shown me that. Her friendship to me is priceless . Her looks have never once come into that. No person here should ever envy her! You would never ever want to experience her childhood and what followed it. I say it over and over! Look past the image and who she is now as a woman who has inspired so many through her work and that includes me. I would not care if I could only see her foot , she is still the same wonderfull caring woman I am proud to call a friend .

 

Julia xx

Cristine, Shye (GS Admin) said:

Whats the fixation with how I look, put yourself in my position as a kid, at school, life in general.   Some will say they are glad they are what they are, me I allways wished I could have been e''normal''    Blessed??? some people just, don't get it.

 

Don't envy me, be happy for who you are,

No one means it as anything to take offense Crissie. No one means to make light of what you've been through. I think the whole point of this thread is to be proud of who you are, love how you look, and don't give a sh*t. Those of us who know you know how beautiful you are inside and outside. Some of us also know that calling any attention to your beauty on the outside is something that you aren't always comfortable with. If I'm sounding insensitive, please set me straight, cause I don't mean to be, but maybe try to appreciate that others appreciate all your beauty, inside and out.

It's NOT envy Cristine, it's ADMIRATION for gods sake and I make no apologies for that. Sure , it would be very superficial of me to comment on your looks had I not read your life story you posted thus far, which may I say DEEPLY touched my heart. Add to that the fact that I am only attracted to women, I just see your NATURAL beauty! I admire you for soo many things that you have been through in your life and, the fact that you have come through it all and STILL manage to look like that (bitch! Lol) You are a role model to me and many others here because of your contribution and hard work you so obviously put in here. So, you see Cristine, it's not envy, it's more the fact that you are one of the pivotal girls here and, because of this you are used as a shining example! Better get used to this me thinks! xxxxx
This post was edited by Linda T at August 29, 2014 3:22 PM BST

I BET she's got lovely feet though Julia! Lol lol lol!

Further, there will always be new people come along who will pay compliments to your looks without knowing how it might upset you.

Were you blessed to have the childhood and life in general that you did, with all the difficult and painful times you endured? No, absolutely not. But you too need to be proud of who you are (I'm not suggesting that you aren't, but...be proud of everything you can). There's so much to be proud of! Why not take all the positives and feel good that you're beautiful?


This post was edited by M G at August 29, 2014 12:00 PM BST

Envy isn't all bad either. Jealousy would be though.
: )

Cristine, Shye (GS Admin) said:Whats the fixation with how I look, put yourself in my position as a kid, at school, life in general.   Some will say they are glad they are what they are, me I allways wished I could have been ''normal''    Blessed??? some people just, don't get it.   Don't envy me, be happy for who you are,
 
As a visually impaired kid with ginger hair (red or strawberry red thank you) with a pair of stupid looking and useless glasses and the way I stood and walked I didn't feel normal and a lot of other kids (some said they were my firends, yeah right) were just being nasty about my looks, the way I stand and walked.  Okay, I am not the best looking person on the world and that's a fact but now if nobody likes how I looked and says so, I say back "Yeah you are right I am ugly." and THAT UPSETS them and they say to me "Don't put yourself down like that."   What the fcuk?  Why did you start to say how ugly I was or whatever and then tell ME off for agreeing with you.  Stupid people.

Oh oh, I got a reputation thingy.  I better behave now otherwise It's a visit to the headmistresses office for me.

There's no such thing as ugly in the sense you've used it Suzy, not in my world. Sure, you aren't a supermodel. Very few of us are or could be. You are undoubtedly one of the most beautiful people on this site though, don't forget that : )
This post was edited by M G at August 29, 2014 3:23 PM BST

My point was that if someone says I am ugly then I wil agree with them, then tell them off after they tell me that I am not ugly and I shouldn't pstill ut myself down.  If they think I am ugly, fine so be it.  If not then why do they say I am ugly in the first place.  They are stupid people.  
 
If I say you look great then I mean it.

It's only people that haven't got enough going on in their OWN lives Suzy that feel they have to comment about yours! xxx

True, very true.

I understand Suzy. I don't like anyone calling themselves ugly, but it's one hec of a way to disarm the truly ugly people who might call you that!
This post was edited by M G at August 29, 2014 3:24 PM BST

In the whole of things, it is best to know a person through and through - rarely does this happen. We first note the other on the surface and have a reaction to that - nothing wrong in that. The only problem is one stops at the surface and remains there - there is no fault in the one admired only the admirer. The key to any person is at any moment they are the sum of all of the things in their life - both the internal and external factors - some good, some bad - but the key to the real person does not lie on the surface, of course, but in how these factors - are addressed by the individual and the energy from them and from the individual is used to redirect these forces back into the universe - either as negative ( which is wrong ) or as positive energy ( the one all of us should be, and is my natural state ) - this then is the true measure of the person. In sum, this girl uses the phrase : Resolve, Solve, Evolve to encompass this idea of simply learning from what happens to me and steer myself and as much of reality as I can address in a positive direction. 

My opinion! I would like to say and think we are all equal. Now here is the problem , in an ideal yes we would be but this is not an ideal world we live in.

Envy and jealousy are the same to me in my mind , would I want to look like Paris Hilton  rather than me? I truly cannot answer that but one thing I can answer is I would not want her personallity. The way I see things in people is through their personallity not by the way they look. I cannot have a decent conversation with a moron. I was invited to lunch last week and after 20 minutes I said I am leaving! Why? Was the response , my response was you invited me to lunch and to catch up on things , well yes I did was the reponse. The person who invited me was messing about with her phone all of the time , we could not talk because as soon as I started to say something she picked her phone up and either responded to the sender or laughed at was was sent to her then saying to me what were you saying? Nothing just pretend I am not here then I was not there.

 

I am who I am I cannot change that , I look the way I look I can change that with surgery but I have no wish to have my face messed about with.

 

I have just been to a meeting , in that meeting were 3 genetic females and 2 genetic males , I was the odd one out. I was not the odd one out because I am Transexual I was the odd one out because of the way I was dressed. The 3 females all had the same corporate dress code on , the 2 males looked like they had been to the same place to buy their suits , even the same colour tie's. I have not got changed yet so when I have finished this I will upload some images of how I looked "Casual".

 

Now I bet when I left that room today the females were talking about my figure , it happens all of time. They were all in my opinion overweight yet I would give anything to have been born in the correct body like they were but , they abuse it. Going on a diet is a lot more easy than changing gender , you just control the arm that feeds the mouth. Now what were the 2 men thinking? Nice arse! That is what I get from men. I think my arse is normal but then looking at most females it is smaller than theirs , a lot smaller in a lot of cases but they don't have to have huge ones.

 

We are all unique! I cannot mention a name but one member of this site is so jealous of not just Crissie but even me. They have hounded me off this place in the past , they hounded both Crissie and myself in the forums. Crissie had the strength to stay here that is the way she is , I was not going to be put down everytime I logged in here by some moron I cannot see so I deleted my account , I thought about deleting again it last night untill Crissie and me started chating and it took my mind off it. That moron is even unique , the most unique moron I have come accross on the internet.

 

I share this website with some very special people , Crissie is my longest and closest friend here I can tell her anything.  I hope that friendship only ends the day my heart stops beating. I think Briana is spot on "It is the person" Internal external upside down inside out , makes no difference how you see the person with your eyes it is how you see them from all ways.

 

Now I have not got a clue what I have just written it maybe fecking inside out for all I know . One thing I do know is I have not eaten today so I am now going to but before I do go and feed my tiny bum. Suzy you are not and never were ugly , you were and are unique. Me? I still and never will give a sh*t , I am who I am.

I will read this later and see if it made sense and correct any errors.

 

Take care , Julia xx

I can't believe this..... I posted the above at 5:19 BST.  I put some food in that thing that cooks it then ate it . I then took a few pics sat down and next thing I know about 4 hours of my life just vanished. After a week of not getting much in the way of sleep age caught up with me. I think my body was saying , Julia you may not give a sh*t but you do have to stop and do things like eat and sleep.

 

Julia xx

Love it Cristine! Lol! Did you buy it on ebay from Julia?
This post was edited by Linda T at August 29, 2014 10:41 PM BST

So after a very long day and not much in the way of food or sleep last night or this week I am now going to add an image to this. This is just how I attended a business meeting today. As you can see I don't give a sh*t so why? They want my business and I had no reason to impress anyone. In a matter of weeks I will be 57 years old and mad people in this world still envy me or are jealous of me. In my own way I relate to Crissie because no person would want to have the life she has.

As for the way I look! No way am I anywhere close to beautiful . What I do have is confidence and pride but , they came with the transition because before I transitioned I had no confidence or pride.

I know this thread has gone way of topic but , the one thing I do give a sh*t about is my friends. I do not like putting it that way but that was in the title. I care very deeply about my friends and I will defend Crissie untill I die because of the way we relate gave us that very very special friendship.

As for the image I am now going to add , just to prove it was taken before I fell asleep I have not cropped the daylight coming through the window out of it. I have resized it to fit screen and that is all I have done to it. My opinion on it! I felt a wreck so I most likely look one and I never retouched my make-up and never do because again I realy really really do not give a sh*t.

If the moron I spoke of is reading this. I know you hide in shame , I know all about you , yes every detail. I will allow you to be jealous of me out of sheer pity because you are a pitiful excuse for a human being.

Anyone else please don't be , my life has been no walk in the park. Just be proud of who you are and the rest will follow.

 

Take care , Julia xx

 

SAM_0186_1[800x600].jpg . Means it is the 186th image taken with my Samsung camera.

This post was edited by Former Member at August 29, 2014 11:09 PM BST

Julia, maybe you were just THINKING " I don't give a shizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz" lol xxx

In a matter of weeks I will be 57 years old and mad people in this world still envy me or are jealous of me


Julia...you always precursor a positive with a negative! Why must someone be mad to admire you?? Just don't get you sometimes girl! Please don't "do yourself down" we all love you....even me now lol! xxxx

I added this for you Crissie , I thought you meant you are running on empty too . xxxx

This post was edited by Former Member at August 30, 2014 10:32 AM BST

Pretty as a picture Julia (apart from the fact you have appeared to label yourself "My Devices" for some reason unbeknown to me lol! Where are your eyes...not sure now if I've ever seen them xxxxx

Better to be a device than a tool.
; )

Julia, there are differences between envy and jealousy, but you got me thinking. I looked up some definitions and it looks like the differences may not be quite what I thought. They are certainly terms that are easily misunderstood, and by many.
I've always understood envy to be wanting or wishing to have something that someone else has, but not at their expense and without any ill will whatsoever towards them. I've understood jealousy to be when the wishes are accompanied by insecurities and ill will towards whoever has what you want but don't have or that you fear losing.

Crissie: I hope I haven't said anything that might have upset you(?)

Madeleine I think the two words are partners. The meanings are to similar to seperate. It depends on the reasons the words are being used. All I know which ever way you look at it no person should envy or be jealous of anyone , more so who we have been talking about here , it must do her head in.

 

Julia.

This post was edited by Former Member at August 30, 2014 10:43 AM BST

I understand that Crissie. I am feeling very uncomfortable about this as I said above it must do your head in. My part in this? The thread was started because of a comment I made on the home page which had nothing to do with you personally. I know why you are here at GS and always have done , I do wonder at times why I am here though. Maybe I should have stayed out of this but I do feel like your unofficial Mother at times. I know you do not need protecting but others do need to understand you are not just a picture. Not just in this thread but many times over the years this happens , all it takes is one comment about you and an avalanche starts. I am taking a break in a couple of weeks on the coast. Both you and Cass are welcome , accomadation all on me.

 

Take care , your friend , Julia xxx

Cristine, Shye (GS Admin) said:

We all appreciate lovely comments, but I seem to be the centre of a lot of public outpourings of admiration.    I just feel uncomfortable and because of somethings I have done in my life, undeserving. it also detracts from why I am here at GS.

I can definitely understand and appreciate that. I also know that new members or any members who don't know you may from time to time make the same type of comments, unaware of why they shouldn't or why they should at least 'tone it down'. Another thing Crissie, is that what's in your past is just that, in your past. The person you are today is what's important, and whatever you are deserving of now has more to do with your present and future. Your past is only relevant in how you have beaten difficult times and learned from any mistakes you've made or things you regret. You can take the positives from it all now, guilt-free. Don't worry about being 'undeserving'. All that said, I'm not arguing your feelings. They are completely valid and must be respected.

Julia Ford said:

Madeleine I think the two words are partners. The meanings are to similar to seperate. It depends on the reasons the words are being used. All I know which ever way you look at it no person should envy or be jealous of anyone , more so who we have been talking about here , it must do her head in.

 

Julia.

I agree. My understanding of the terms has been broadened, but I still point out as you said, "It depends on the reasons the words are being used." : )