I wrote this poem sometime last year, thought I'd share it. It's my favouite thing I ever wrote
I once woke up and looked out the window
Listen to an intro, ****** on indo
My pale skin glowed though I felt so rough
touched by the heat I was safe once
Spent months in shades, blazing on blunts
Till an angel had come and it got me wondering
What happened to fun? Lumbered with sadness
this cynical world alone I'd crafted
And mastered the art of a bleeding heart
I needed a spark, a belief in life
That I'm sorry I saw in your beautiful eyes
This storys one so full of surprises, cuz I nearly died on that shameful island
Truth is in the mist of that silence, for once I really struggled to lie and
I felt so trapped in your colours... vibrant.
It went and worsened whenever you asked why.
You were the person I couldn't deceive, for the first time ever and I couldn't believe it
Consumed with guilt, holding these secrets
The walls I'd built I began to hit
All that I hid as a kid, transparent
The sands of my life, wasted - apparent
I hadn't ever felt such a sick imbalance
As tricks I'd learnt then burned away, I closed all curtains on the 13th day
Certain that I'm worth to be deserted, but something in my world then diverted back
To a past imperfect then suddenly 'flash!'
So I asked myself what help is this mask?
Then it hit me at last, I remembered fast
Memories from school and the cul de sac
That fact remained, no synchronicity
The answer then danced in the lights of the city
From the bottom of my heart and this music within me
The Truth is I was you...
See, it isn't so easy is it?
Singing to yourself in such a cold blizzard
Used to be that wizzard that believed in magic
I read it all back, was so ******* bad it's...
Looking to the past, denial of existance
Instantly that flame in my heart had parted,
that was when it all started,
It's hard until you then, crash into stardust
Try to rise above it but you only cried
cuz only to lie was a way to survive
Then a whole your later your amazed at why
as you wave bye, to your fake defences
Thinking of the friend you miss still sighing,
Maybe it's a sign to rewind time
Learn from your mind as you map the madness
Turn the traffic like your traffic checking
eject from the steps that you once had repped in
then drop the weapons, maybe hope for heaven
then speak for a second with your head in the clouds
and be proud to say "**** it I failed"
cuz I'm only human but Ineed more fuel than money
or anything I'd ever consumed
as my minds keep moving in time with music
Danni's alive though she still ain't used to it
Her bodys abused and these shoes don't fit
Knew it as he fell he was soon to lose it
Till blues hit a fuse and he blew up chewing on a pill and view 'no way to move on'
when 'So Long Goodbye' was a soothing song
when suicide used to carese these vibes
he longed to die, impossible to right whats so wrong... that he can't go on with
for once in his life he's gotta acknowledge it
so listen to this and the promise he makes
you can laugh and judge as the honest breaks him
All I can say is try to stay patient
Cuz in those years thats the way his life went...