I need help!

    • 2 posts
    February 3, 2015 8:09 PM GMT

    Hi. please help me. I can't control my feelings and thoughts. I can't start the transition yet and I have to wait for a long time to be able to do it. but the problem is that I cannot wait that long. I can't pull myself together and I'm in a really difficult situation. looking at female clothes is painful, seeing other girls is painful, being called as a boy is painful, waking up in the morning as a boy is painful. I hate mirrors and I hate the fact that I'm becoming more masculine over time. everything is so painful!!!((

    • 178 posts
    February 3, 2015 8:51 PM GMT

    Alice, I'm sorry that you find yourself in such a painful and apperntly hopeless place.  You do not say how old you are, but I suspect that you are, perhaps an early teenager.  If I am wrong, no matter.  What is important that you are clearly at the start of a long, difficult, and sometimes painful journey.  There are many people here wo have gone through the same agonies as you have, and have blossomed out at the other end.


    There IS no quick fix, Alice. Sadly, it is a journey of one slow step at a time.  Each slow step DOES bring it's own understandings, and is, inevitably, another buliding block in the foundation of your own reality.


    Alice - I KNOW it's hard but slow down - alright, not what you want to hear - but that is the reality.  Talk to the wonderful ladies you'll find on here.. Listen to them, and if you want to, PM me.



    Amanda, Site Shrink

  • February 3, 2015 9:03 PM GMT

    Hi Alice .

    Could you please explain why you have to wait and why you cannot start your transition?. You are young and the sooner you see a specialist the better for you.

    Can you not put clothing out of your mind? that may help. Clothes do not make you a female the female is on the inside not the outside. Clothes are a fashion statement and an expression of taste and choice. Yes they are an important part of being female but not a severe concern. The main concern should for now be your health and well being and that means in your mind.

    You cannot escape mirrors and you cannot escape the fact you were born into a male body. What you can escape is bad thoughts though. If you think positive thoughts and think of the future it may make the now feel better. Think of what you can be and not who you are right now.

    I know it hurts but you do need to do this fo yourself. You can pull yourself together if you think positive , thinking negative will make you feel worse.

    You are with others who understand here but there is only so much that can be done on the internet. The support is here for you from others who have been in your situation and made it , you can make it.


    Take care x

  • February 3, 2015 9:11 PM GMT

    And yes do PM Amanda! She is amazing and is here for you when available. Sadly she is not on emegency call out and there is only one Amanda to go around.


    Take care x

    • 143 posts
    February 3, 2015 11:39 PM GMT
    It is okay to have a goal or destination in mind, but there is always the journey which can be as fulfilling and worthwhile - if you make it so. Keep in mind there is no one you are in a race with. Every step has its benefits and its costs - all parts of life are moments in learning. Find good help and there are good people like Amanda and others here to talk to. All the best in your journey! hugs, Briana : )
    • 2 posts
    February 4, 2015 8:07 AM GMT

    okay. thank you all. i guess i just have to be patient for now. I wish it was easy.