My First Time Out in Public

    • 95 posts
    February 22, 2012 2:09 AM GMT

    OK, I went out last night! With confidence in my makeup looks and a nice outfit (striped skirt, red jacket), I picked up a take-out order two towns over, 20 miles round trip in a 1-ton cargo van...it was 830PM.

     

    Nervous getting out of my neighborhood (everyone knows that van). Nervous about police stopping me for???? or a minor car accident? Felt completely normal in the clothes I was wearing, though. Certainly not a "muted" look, so it might attract attention to myself...oh, dear....

     

    Got to the restaurant and there was a guy with tattoos changing his t-shirt, I parked a couple rows ahead. Just as I was getting my shoulderbag together (money in bag not wallet!), a very large pickup truck pulled in behind me, one space over. Engine running, lights on. WTF!! I waited a few minutes to see what they are going to do; meanwhile, about 7 "18-20 somethings" finished their bantering in the car beside me and left. Mild panic. Then, a-ha! I got my cell phone, opened the door, swiveled sideways in the seat an hopped out, cell in hand. Walk forward away from the van, small steps, adjust clothes, and go.

     

    in my best voice i could, "order for Robin?". Paid with cash using my what looked like a catcher mitt for a hand. I barely looked at the clerk, let alone scan the restaurant. I think the clerk knew - my hands!! I waxed all the hair off but they are still quite large. I got my change, paused while I stashed it in my shoulderbag, and walked (small steps) out, again looking mostly down and at my cell.  Back to the van, pickup still there (s**t!), open door and climb  the high step "clumsily", like a girl might. Then back home without incident.  

     

    Did I "pass"?. Not quite sure...at a distance I'd say "yes" but that cashier BIG question mark. 

     

    So an exciting time out, for certain,  my first adventure and was mostly fun. Planning to go out again soon....

    -Robin   

     

    Oh, ignore the next topic "shoes...". It was meant to inquire about passing by wearing the "correct" footwear with certain styles of clothing, to not attract attention.   

     

    • 746 posts
    February 22, 2012 2:36 AM GMT
    Has your heart left your throat yet? LOL Seriously, next time you MUST walk in there with your head UP and still, only moving your eyes a little...do make brief eye contact with those that are looking at you, but continue forward like you OWN the place...feel free to smile easily and just move about like any other female human on this planet...you got over the first big hurdle...it will get tons easier...
    Best wishes always!
    Traci xoxo
    • 308 posts
    February 22, 2012 4:36 AM GMT

    Hi Robin,

    My god Robin, you are way ahead of me when I first went out to a store. This was many yrs ago but I will cut this story short, the whole story is posted some where in the forums.

    But I got ready, drove to a dress store, pulled up in front and was just about ready to get out feeling really good about myself. Now this car pulls up next to me and a lady starts to get out, looks into my car, screams, yes screamed and got back into her car and sped off. Thinking that I am sure the police will be shortly on there way, I sped off, with a very destroyed ego.

      Gawd, I am so glad you had a great experience, and it's just gets better, and soon you will not even give it a second thought. Like Traci said, confidence, and in my case...I had to get a clue on how to do makeup and use the proper wig.

     

    Good luck girl...Huggs Tammy

  • February 22, 2012 11:07 AM GMT
    First successful time out fully dressed as a woman is a milestone. I can remember mine (posting a letter) as though it was yesterday, although it was over 40yrs (40!!!) ago. Heart-stopping? yes, but I felt absolutely wonderful.
    • 114 posts
    February 22, 2012 3:39 PM GMT
    This is a great story, Robin. Good for you!

    I still get butterflies when I go out. But, they're right. It's all attitude and body language.

    Congratulations!!
    • 434 posts
    February 22, 2012 4:16 PM GMT
    Wow! That brings back memories. I remember my first time as well. I thought of it as "the thrill that lives just beside panic."
    Congrats hun!
    • 95 posts
    February 23, 2012 12:33 AM GMT
    Tammy Brianne said:

    Hi Robin,

    My god Robin, you are way ahead of me when I first went out to a store. This was many yrs ago but I will cut this story short, the whole story is posted some where in the forums.

    But I got ready, drove to a dress store, pulled up in front and was just about ready to get out feeling really good about myself. Now this car pulls up next to me and a lady starts to get out, looks into my car, screams, yes screamed and got back into her car and sped off. Thinking that I am sure the police will be shortly on there way, I sped off, with a very destroyed ego.

      Gawd, I am so glad you had a great experience, and it's just gets better, and soon you will not even give it a second thought. Like Traci said, confidence, and in my case...I had to get a clue on how to do makeup and use the proper wig.

     

    Good luck girl...Huggs Tammy

     

    • 95 posts
    February 23, 2012 12:43 AM GMT
    Good grief Tammy, I'd have been devestated as well. I have GOT to find that story! I am sure I will have my "moments" in the days and months to come.
    Thanks to you all who have given me confidence with your kind words, "Likes" for pics in my profile, and answers to questions. I probably couldn't have done it without those. Warmest regards,
    -Robin
    • 746 posts
    February 23, 2012 2:02 AM GMT
    Awwww....fuggheddabowdit! (smile)
    xoxox
    • 95 posts
    March 8, 2012 1:04 AM GMT

    Second Time out...Afternoon shopping!

     

     OK, getting bold here. Actually I dressed and went out a week ago Friday to go to Walgreens for some stuff, and found at teh ATM I had no brake lights. So back home until I could fix that.

     

    So Sunday afternoon I got dressed and drove to DSW shoes to "shop". I tried on some flats, which I didn't like, and some modestly high wedge pumps, which I did like but have no place to go to wear anything so dressy. Browsing around comfortably, head high (Traci Lee!) and a some eye contact with shoppers but no alarmed looks or quizzical stares. A woman actually looked back at me and held the door open as I left. Then I went grocery shopping to get something for dinner. Again, no strange looks or stares, though i DID avoid any checkout line with a high school girl ringing stuff up.....of course i wans't wearing my glasses so everything was a little fuzzy, so maybe my blurred vision filtered out the bad??? Ignorance is bliss, right?

     

    Again, getting out of my neighborhood is the hardest obstacle to clear. Very conscious of my beat-up van around town (I purchases some inexpensive red "Vans" sunglasses to drive out of town!). Feeling very natural and comfortable with my clothes and look. I am actually kind of happy, which I havn't been in nearly 20 years.

     

    Warm regards to all,

    -Robin     

    • 746 posts
    March 8, 2012 7:57 AM GMT
    (smile) It's only gets easier!
    Traci xoxo
    • 1 posts
    April 3, 2012 2:37 PM BST
    I would like a GF who could walk me through it; it would be fun.
  • April 18, 2012 4:58 PM BST
    I love reading stuff like this......v encouraging! x
  • June 11, 2012 12:00 AM BST
    I got dressed up and went to walwart the first time I went out Iacted as if I did it all the time an no one looked at me twice or maybe I just didn't see it but everyone I saw smiled an acted friendly I bought what I needed an went on home so if you think female they will exsept you as you are
  • June 12, 2012 12:49 AM BST
    Traci's right, it get's easier with each wonderful outing. The only off experience, and I say off because it was more annoying then bad, was having a 12 or 13 year old girl follow me around a store the whole time I was there. Keep your head up and though I probably have far less experience than a lot of girls here, I say, if they read you, who cares. Confidence grows with each time out. I love heels but was always afraid to wear them because I'm 5'11". Now, lol, flats are against my religion. Keep it up and walk proud, and have fun along the way. : )
    • 434 posts
    June 12, 2012 2:43 AM BST
    I guess when we girls wear heels... it gives true meaning to the expression "Walking Tall"
    • 746 posts
    June 12, 2012 8:09 PM BST
    Yup...just do it, and do it with the attitude you belong there as much as anyone...sounds to me like you're well on your way though! (smile) xoxo
  • June 12, 2012 11:07 PM BST
    I hope so I just do what feels right

  • June 12, 2012 11:08 PM BST
    I hope so I just do what feels right