Why is it that every topic you get involved with descends into anarchy Chalice - I am locking this thread until further notice.

Thanks Crissie, hopefully we will have all learned a valuable lesson from all of this

I often refer to myself, as a boy in a dress or transvestite. I find neither offencive or demeaning. I use these terms quite often when chatting with other girls here. Also not to cause offence, but mearly to clarify my gender. Quite often a girl will ask if I`m full time. Or am I TS. So I usually use those terms. If they were to say are you a tranny, a cross dresser. I`d be ok with that too. Tranny for me is a general term. Which stretches across the transgender community. We are all sisters, but first & foremost. We are human beings. saying that, I`ve unintentionally omitted our brothers who are also TS. It is an over complicated issue. I made my feelings clear, earlier on this thread. If someone has no affect or importance in your life. Why would you allow them to offend you? What they say will never make any difference to your life. Unless you allow them too. To give power to someone who yearns for it, by trying to give offence. To me personally. I feel is a waste, & taking away from something you could be doing that could empower you & others of our community. I have to also agree with Maggie. She said "when all said & done, she wants to be called Maggie" I can`t think of a more reasoned response to worrying about labals.....

Love Daisy

In house politics aside.

From my point of view, if in was walking down the street as Monique as was so say clocked by someone, i would rather be called a tranny than a freak, at least they would recognise at least some aspect of transgender people!

My life is just being me. I have said before it has been a long hard journey but I still would not change it. I have been asked in the past why do you put yourself through this? Just go back to who you were! Now that is easy for someone else to say but it was not me and I know I would not be here today if I had not transitioned when I did , it was killing me.

They say words don't or can't hurt you! Words aimed in hate do hurt I know from experience. I am tough I had to be just as others do "But" not everyone is tough , I have been a victim but the real victims are the ones that have not survived. It is not usually one trans person agains't one transphobic bigot it is usually one agains't a crowd because in numbers they are really big brave people! Like 6 really brave men agains't one cornered trans girl! Who will win? Stupid question.

I would like to know why is it always us? I do know the answer really it is just pure ignorance nothing more.

It is fine to use words in fun with friends ect and it is also fine to use words if that person does not mind ,but in pure hatred it is not acceptable we deserve better. Although I get by ok now makes no difference to me because for the sake of the younger and future generations it needs to be stopped. Just my thoughts and untill it changes always will be.

Julia.

Wow, what a week. Anyone that knows me knows it almost never rains where I live, so you can imagine I was pretty lost standing in a sh#t storm.  When I came here almost three years ago, I was very amazed at the whole, I'm better than you because I'm a ( fill in the label ) .  I never thought it would be that way in a community made up exclusively of "US".  When I joined there were two other members, both still here, that used to speak horribly to me.  They don't anymore and I doubt they even remember.  This past week has been another eye opening experience for me.  Why, when we experience what we experience from society, would we act that way towards each other?  WE ARE ALL THE SAME.  I don't really have any STRONG feelings about the labels, one way or the other.  Do I believe they exist? YES, but to me they aren't something that marks a rank in a society because again, WE ARE ALL THE SAME.  I explained how I felt to someone here that I feel is very special recently, that we are all the same, and we are on a ladder in life, a ladder that main stream society doesn't climb.  Some of us are happy on the lower wrungs, not a rank, but a measurement of how far we have gone.  Some are trapped on the lower wrungs and can't move because of money, fear of loss, the list goes on and on.  Others are climbing slowly but steadily, and others are just screaming up to the top.  The point is, WE ARE ALL THE SAME.  We all know that we were born differently than other people, and we are all different from those people, IN THE SAME WAY.  The only things that should matter is our own personal happiness in achieving what we want to achieve as individuals, and caring and supporting those around us so they can achieve what it is that makes them reach their personal goal, what ever it is.  I used to think this was the most fantastic place on earth, even though it isn't a physical place.  I'm not so sure anymore, but maybe I will feel that way again at some point.  I'm sure someone will tell me that everything I have written is wrong and have an explanation for why I am wrong, who knows, I actually hope not.  Not that it would anger me, I just don't come here for drama.  I come here to get away from it, and be with those who are like me, at least in that one special way..........  I know as a person I am a little different lol   I have seen some comments from people after this week that made me think that others feel it was a bad week also, maybe ther's hope for us yet.

Well said Briana!

Darling Bri,

there are many who think the same way as you. Alas your post sounds a little disillusioned. Don`t give up darling. There are many here trying to be the best they can be. All societies have a wide variety of personalities. This one is no different. You`ll remember possibly. Before Christmas, I noted that I believed there was a certain element of elitism here. This did cause offence to some, & some supported my view. All the same, I`ve made friends with some wonderful people here. We are a family, & all families fight at some time. We can`t possibly agree on all things with each other. There are passionate people here. Yourself one of them. Your post was neither aggressive or writen to cause controversey. It was a forceful & reasoned, with your heart openly on your sleeve. I`m not like you Bri, we are not all the same. If we were more in your mould. This site would truely be a safe haven for all transgender people. As it is, i believe we have enough people (moderaters) who care enough to make this as best a site it can possibly be. With such a diverse section of people, who inhabit it. So dont dispair darling. much love Daisy

At the present time, 'tranny' suits me. Maybe its because I haven't built up any negative associations or connotations surrounding the term. When I am 'out' on the weekend, if someone called me a tranny I think I would thank them for their acknowledgement.  Or if they asked me directly if I was a tranny instead of just thinking it, as I know they do, I would just answer them with a simple: Yes. Of course, if I buy a t-shirt with 'Tranny' on the front that might save them the trouble.      

 

monique h said:

In house politics aside.

From my point of view, if I was walking down the street as Monique and was so say clocked by someone, I would rather be called a tranny than a freak, at least they would recognise at least some aspect of transgender people!

" Heaps of people, straight people, don't really seem to understand gayness and queerness and bisexuality. That's why I think that labels are still important, even if some people don't like them. If straight people can't understand, or are not educated, then LGBT people become like a small club that makes up its own rules and removes itself from social realities."

written by a 15 year old. Taken from: "Writing Themselves In 3: The third national study on the sexual health and well being of same sex attracted and gender questioning young people. Australian Research Centre in Sex, Health & Society, La Trobe University. 2012