Your name

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  • How did you pick your female name? Is it important to have a good female name to pass in public? Is staying away from less common names (like anita or fiona) a good idea or staying away from common names (like Kelly or Samantha)?
      August 23, 2006 2:07 PM BST
  • I was just lazy, I picked out the name that had one letter difference from my old name. The good thing is that if or when I get mail on my old name it can be explained as a printing error. Also I can hear my name wright even if my male name would be used. Only my mom was not happy...she would have named me Katri. But no objections about my female sex.

      August 23, 2006 2:12 PM BST
  • 2625
    The right name is the one that feels like you. If kelly doesn't have that feel you can change it later. There is no right or wrong. Unless you want to realy stand out don't pick anything realy different.
    <p>Karen Brad</p>
      August 23, 2006 2:35 PM BST
  • I had my parents name me. I figured since they did it once they should have the honour again!
      August 23, 2006 9:53 PM BST
  • I to got my name from my mother .....she nad a list of names she was going to call me if i was to be born male of female .... i don't think she expected to use them both.. oh well
    My middle name came from Beverly out of love and respect for her.

    But no matter how you get your name as long as it feels right it is good for you
    Life is to short to be sad and cry. Bring out your inner Joy. Smile in the sun and enjoy life. Blessed be.
      August 23, 2006 10:12 PM BST
  • The full female name I use is Charisse Lyn Phillips.

    Like most posted here, I, too, used family names:

    Kari is short for Charisse, which I always pronounced with an "sh" sound at the beginning, but everyone who read it seemed to begin it with a "k" sound. So, I gave up fighting it and then shortened it to Kari. Less confusion. Kind of like what happens with a name like Jennifer. Do I call her Jennifer, Jen, Jenni, Jenny, Jeni, or what.

    Just going by good 'ol Kari avoids the whole thing. And, it's easier to type late at night when posting whilst sleepy.

    The middle name, Lynn, is a tip of the hat to my lovely wife, as it is her middle name.

    The last name is a pluralized nod to my grandfather, on my Dad's side, who wasn't alive when I was born: Phillips.

    It's long, but sounded nice when I put it all together.



      August 24, 2006 4:32 AM BST
  • Having the right to rename me I used it as widely as possible. In addition to Laura I took also Virve and Natalia.
    I first decided for Virpi, because I´m born on Virpi´s day, but then I met a Virpi who was so stupid that I didn´t want to be Virpi any more. Natalia is a beautiful name and I love to read Natalia Ginzburg´s novels in Italian.
    But as a whole Laura Virve Natalia has international names, actually from three neighbouring countries; Finland, Estonia and Russia. All of them dear to me.

      August 24, 2006 5:50 AM BST
  • I guess with time I'll just find a name I feel comfortable with. If I were to have been able to pick my male name, I would have chosen Ryan Lawrence Brantford
      August 24, 2006 8:36 AM BST
  • In my country anyone has the right to pick out hir or her name without a charge. They charge for the name change only if it happens twice or more often.
    To pick out a name, different from your juridical sex, is only allowed to diagnosted transsexuals, with a special statement printed out by the screening personnel.

      August 24, 2006 9:10 AM BST
  • Well, there's only one reason why i chose anna-marie....& thats cos it just sounded "right", if you can understand that

    LOL xxxxxxxxx
    "When the world gets in my face i say HAVE A NICE DAY"
      August 24, 2006 9:20 PM BST
  • I've Had a few but just wasen't satisfied with them till I started using Samantha I chose it because it fit my persona a cute sexy name for a shy yeat fun loving girl. To me your name should say something about your self, how do you feel about the name you picked does it fit you or not. To me it dosen't matter weather you use a common name or even a less commen name as long as it fits you that in my openion is all that matters.
      August 30, 2006 1:46 AM BST
  • I became Rachel way back around 67-68. First it was Raquel from Raquel Welch but, my friend Eric/Erica kept saying Rachel so Rachel I was. My middle name, Allison came about around 71 because I so loved Ali McGraws hair and wanted to look just like her. My last name, Stevens is actually my middle name with the S added on. Rachelngarters (Rachel in garters) came from a guy I was once dated from the Hillcrest area in San Diego because I always wore a garterbelt and stockings when we went out. To this day I still have never wore pantyhose. Rachel Allison Stevens just fits me, much like garters and stockings
      September 1, 2006 12:44 AM BST
  • I took a great deal of time finding the right name for me, I tried a few privately but 'Nikki' just seemed to fit my persona. My last name is actually the name of a very dear girlfriend I met in Germany when I was 16.
    Every woman is beautiful, some show it with their faces, others show it with their hearts.
      September 1, 2006 9:12 PM BST
  • I chose Lucy because thats who I feel like.
    I always use to be Sarah whilst growing up liked the name.
    But Lucy feels more natural to me.
    Just the other day someone called out Lucy and I turned round, a little embaressing as I was not dressed en femme.
    So Lucy I am and Lucy I will stay.
      September 3, 2006 11:02 AM BST
  • 2625
    LOL Lucy I've done that. Than thought OMG I wonder if anyone saw me. I'll answer to Karen as quickly as I do to my given name. Thats how well it fits my mind set.
    <p>Karen Brad</p>
      September 3, 2006 11:40 AM BST
  • Congratulations Frances. Enjoy your new world.
    Every woman is beautiful, some show it with their faces, others show it with their hearts.
      September 6, 2006 9:11 PM BST
  • Like my TW sisters I decided on Gemma because it felt right to me and I think matches my demure and yet occasional sexy attitude when Gemma comes out to play.

    When you find the right name that fits how you feel, it's like luv.... you'll know it's right !

    Lots of love

    Gem xx
      September 7, 2006 12:31 AM BST
  • OK, so I had this really big crush on the French actress Julie Delphy. She was in this wild, strange bank caper film in the 90s called "Killing Zoe". I liked the name very much and when I started going into chatrooms, I used the somehow funner spelling "Zoey". It seemed to me really that my name picked me rather than the other way around.

    My middle name is Elizabeth. Elizabeth was the first person I ever told about me. She died of cancer and I dedicated my middle name to her.
    Bum a ride to Bangkok? Anyone?
      October 13, 2006 10:57 AM BST
  • My first femme name was June. I picked that because an older lady who I worked with was absolutely gorgeous and I hoped that I looked as good as her when I reached my mid 50s. Then when I was looking to change my name by deed poll I wanted a name that meant my signature would remain the same as it was before my transitioning started. So it had to have the initials AJW. The W was easy as I did not intend changing my surname. J remained as June but became my middle name. I needed a forename starting with A but not too similar to my male name of Alan. Therefore Alana was out. I checked a few web sites and came up with Alina, nice and short but not very common here in England.
    So my name is Alina June Wicks. My dad likes it and that is very important to me. Work mates have no problem remembering it (not that they should as it has been my name for almost 11 months now).

    Kelly, the name you use is one you should be at ease with yourself.

    Alina xx
    Life is proceeding at a lovely pace
      November 5, 2006 10:14 AM GMT
  • For me choosing a name was not a problem I have trauma from my father and decided a long time ago to use my mothers maiden name, Lewis. First name was one I liked and was reminded of everytime I went to ride my vintage Mopeds. Those from Europe might remember the Puch Maxi Luxe, also my favorite science-fiction show Lexx. So I naturally went with Lux it just seemed to fit my personality. To develope any good idea it's best not to think hard, it will just cloud your head. Instead go by feel use your emotions and be patient, you probably know your name already you just have to find it in yourself. Guess that advice came from the Designer in me
      November 21, 2006 5:31 PM GMT
  • **grins**

    We go through this in cycles...! I know in the archives we talked about names. But it is good to go through it again, every so often.

    I chose my name (after having tried two others!) based on simple personal preference. Sakura in Japanese is "Cherry Blossom", and Minako is Beautiful (little) child. So my name translates into "Beautiful Child of the Cherry Blossom." Mina (pronounced "Mee-nah") is the informal use of Minako.

    Having said that, choose your name wisely. See why here.

    Luv 'n hugs to you all,

    Mina Sakura
    "Almost-Angel, T-Girl Genius, and Ultra-Flirt"
    Living as the woman I am!
      November 21, 2006 6:24 PM GMT
  • Melinda--

    Hmmmm....does one's name alter one's ability to pass?

    I have a slight beef along that line, hon.

    Kelli asked if we thought it was “…important to have a good female name to pass in public? Is staying away from less common names (like anita or fiona) a good idea or staying away from common names (like Kelly or Samantha)?” I think is answer is not necessarily!

    While I agree with your initial premise--your choice of name can help you pass, if I read your post correctly—my feeling is that if you can't pass based on your choice of name, then honey, you can't pass. This is not a hard and fast rule, however, so allow me to explain my thoughts along this line.

    Obviously, your choice of name probably should be conventional. A "normal" name--depending on place/year of birth, etc. can be helpful in passing. If your name is Betty, Sue, Lisa or Jane, you shouldn't have too many odd looks in my neighborhood. On the other hand with a name like, say, Contessa DiValencia LePetomaine, you're begging to get examined--unless you look like a Contessa! I admit to getting some strange looks--I am, after all, quite caucasian--and with a Japanese name, I admit to getting a fair number of looks. ability to pass or not runs much, much deeper than my choice of name. There are a lot of factors that play into that. How I walk, my tone of voice and choice of words, hairstyle, confidence level, choice of makeup (or suitable lack thereof), appropriateness level of clothing (not wearing a ballgown to Wal-Mart, for example)...and a host of other things all play into that. It has to run much deeper than a name. Like I said in my article: “…you need to choose your name wisely.” But to me, there is so much more to passing than just your name.

    Luv ‘n hugs,
    Living as the woman I am!
      December 4, 2006 5:32 AM GMT
  • It's true we've done this before. I find that every time my perceptions and understanding of my name choice has altered somewhat.

    I started a "name" hunt as a decision that involved deciding I wanted a girl's name when cross-dressing. By the time I reached TW, and realized I was TG, it was a search for a pseudonym to use as an online identity at TG sites. That's all Wendy Larsen was to me at the time I joined. Since then you have made it my name and I've come to identify with it, often more so than my birth name. I often have to hesitate when asked my name....and think. I can't imagine changing it now. I have never liked my birth name (sorry mom) and I'm quite fond of Wendy Larsen. In addition, my SO prefers to call me Wendy.

    I had decided that the "exotic" names were definitely a bad idea for going out in the world. I knew if I managed to "pass" I certainly wanted a simple name, easy to understand and spell, unambiguous and definitely not one that might be gender-ambiguous and cause people to check closely to see if I was Terry or Teri. I wanted it short, feminine, unambiguous, easy to spell and not "sexy"/attention causing or a unfortunate pun / entendre. All designed to not draw attention. I considered the homonym of my male name. In retrospect it would make things easy for my SO as she could call me either version, in front of acquaintances, without drawing more than a slight attention which her accent could explain away. I underestimated the value of this and I DO like the femme version of my name.....but you have all given me a deep emotional attachment for Wendy, my other top choice. So you see, my reasons for my name have changed since I first picked it. Considering it took me about two years to find a name I like I'm glad I still do.

    I also avoided my given names, since realizing I was TG, because I wanted to avoid any embarrassment for my family. This way they can choose whether to let anyone know about me and what I do publicly will not land on them through a Google search. Interestingly, my mother and I (birth name) are the only two in the family without a single hit in Google search.

    Hanna, I plan to ask my mother to let me use the name she would have given a daughter as my middle name. I owe her that. It would be a token of acceptance. As Wendy I have hits. Looks like I guessed right on that one. In addition, it turns out that Wendy means: A wanderer; fair complexioned.......which I didn not know when I picked it. I am a military brat and have moved more times than most of you have pairs of shoes. I am a backpacker. I am blond. I think I have a winner here, lol.
    "A live lived in fear is a life half-lived." - Native American proverb. "Inside every man is a woman who was drowned in testosterone before birth". - Wendy Jeanette Larsen "It is better to be hated for what you are than loved for what you're not." - Andre Gide (French writer)
      December 4, 2006 10:58 AM GMT
  • We do call you other things at times Anna !. lol..... I got Denise cause its always been a name that stuck in my im a big Denise Van Outen fan.... and Bond...well because i cant afford an aston martin DB5 ! lol
      August 23, 2007 7:24 PM BST
  • Hi All,
    For me, Michelle just seemed right. It is the female form of my drab name,
    so it is easier to sign, write.... and I don't have to change any monograms.
    (he he - actually I don't have any).

    Seriously, I've always thought of myself as Michelle, even when people called me Michael.

    Hugz, and wishing our Ohio sisters a safe time. Hope you all are ok,

    Michelle Lynn
      August 27, 2007 3:27 AM BST