Meredith Newton 's Entries

• 13 May 2008
  Soon

  As soon as my schedule lightens up I'll finally be able to get back to seeing doctors for the transitioning.Things are still going good at the museum for now.  Our hearts are still healing, but I have been noted and singled out at meeting for stepping up and solving problems.  Both the museum president and vice president wrote and spoke about my good work.  In addition, more than once I jumped into the outfit for another exhibit - without clearing it with management - in order to help out.  My supervisors gave me a little gift card to a great ice cream place as a token of appreciation.  Our division Director, however, was a little miffed at me last week.  She's the architect behind the blood bath a few months back.  She has this desire to do improv, and feels we want to do the same.  She often makes us play these moronic improv games in the morning meeting, something none of us like, and have said so.  My lack of enthusiasm for last Wednesday's game was a little too evident.  What's next, Heather?  Duck duck goose?  But, as I found out, she got rather trashed at a museum night event.My writing is coming along, and I am going to be submitting proposals to other publishers soon.I see my kid more than ever.  We have such a good time.  It is amazing how much that kid can eat and not gain an ounce.Tonight I gave a final exam for my History of Chicago class.  I won't be back at that school.  They had a full-time spot open, for which I was perfect, and have not even spoken to me about it.  I will finish off the term and quietly leave.  I will not accept any part-time work from them.  Plus, it's way out in Glen Ellyn, where I lived prior to my city apartment.  I moved into the city to be closer to work, and here I am going back out there once a week.  Tomorrow I sign the renewal lease for this current flat, which is really starting to come together.I know this isn't much today.  Just a little update.

  931 Posted by Meredith Newton
• By Meredith Newton

  Soon

  As soon as my schedule lightens up I'll finally be able to get back to seeing doctors for the transitioning.Things are still going good at the museum for now.  Our hearts are still healing, but I have been noted and singled out at meeting for stepping up and solving problems.  Both the museum president and vice president wrote and spoke about my good work.  In addition, more than once I jumped into the outfit for another exhibit - without clearing it with management - in order to help out.  My supervisors gave me a little gift card to a great ice cream place as a token of appreciation.  Our division Director, however, was a little miffed at me last week.  She's the architect behind the blood bath a few months back.  She has this desire to do improv, and feels we want to do the same.  She often makes us play these moronic improv games in the morning meeting, something none of us like, and have said so.  My lack of enthusiasm for last Wednesday's game was a little too evident.  What's next, Heather?  Duck duck goose?  But, as I found out, she got rather trashed at a museum night event.My writing is coming along, and I am going to be submitting proposals to other publishers soon.I see my kid more than ever.  We have such a good time.  It is amazing how much that kid can eat and not gain an ounce.Tonight I gave a final exam for my History of Chicago class.  I won't be back at that school.  They had a full-time spot open, for which I was perfect, and have not even spoken to me about it.  I will finish off the term and quietly leave.  I will not accept any part-time work from them.  Plus, it's way out in Glen Ellyn, where I lived prior to my city apartment.  I moved into the city to be closer to work, and here I am going back out there once a week.  Tomorrow I sign the renewal lease for this current flat, which is really starting to come together.I know this isn't much today.  Just a little update.

  May 13, 2008 931
• 09 Apr 2008
  Being very open

  I was switched over to the U-505 today.  As usual, I had in my earrings.  During some of my routine I make little jokes here and there at myself.  While in the Petty Officers' quarters, right before I move the group into the Control Room, I say the following:"Now, before we go, first, I don't know if any of you ladies have heels on.  Funny, every time I say that all the guys look at the own feet.  The thing is, heels have been known to get caught from time to time.  I myself had to switch from heels to flats since working here."The crowd always laughs at that joke.  I then follow up with another comment.  But some teenage boy then cut in and said about me in a loud voice "See, I told you he was gay."  His dad was standing right there and made it clear that the comment was inappropriate.  Without blinking I responded "I am not gay, I'm transgendered."Every time I work on the U-505 some boy/man has to go out of his way to prove how obnoxious the male species can be.

  915 Posted by Meredith Newton
• By Meredith Newton

  Being very open

  I was switched over to the U-505 today.  As usual, I had in my earrings.  During some of my routine I make little jokes here and there at myself.  While in the Petty Officers' quarters, right before I move the group into the Control Room, I say the following:"Now, before we go, first, I don't know if any of you ladies have heels on.  Funny, every time I say that all the guys look at the own feet.  The thing is, heels have been known to get caught from time to time.  I myself had to switch from heels to flats since working here."The crowd always laughs at that joke.  I then follow up with another comment.  But some teenage boy then cut in and said about me in a loud voice "See, I told you he was gay."  His dad was standing right there and made it clear that the comment was inappropriate.  Without blinking I responded "I am not gay, I'm transgendered."Every time I work on the U-505 some boy/man has to go out of his way to prove how obnoxious the male species can be.

  Apr 09, 2008 915
• 06 Apr 2008
  Really coming out

  This week I will be calling my "new" doctor to schedule an appointment.  I really miss my other doctor.  She was not only a great doctor but also a very attractive black woman.  I wish I could look like her!I came out to another co-worker last night.  I was going to tell her last week when we were working the Zephyr alone.  She was totally cool about it, not to mention VERY supportive.  I always liked this girl because she is a free thinker, very much in her own little universe.  Josie met her when she first visted the museum.Speaking of the museum, they are treating me with kid's gloves these days.  I think they're afraid I am going to leave.  The VP herself wrote a glowing e-mail about me to my supervisor.  The VP got a chance to watch me in action and she thought I was the best.  My supervisors are also doing what they can to make sure I am assigned to certain daily activities they know I like, such as Pocket Science and the Petroleum Planet exhibit.  I especially love Pocket Science as I get to wander around the museum all day and play little science games with the kids.  The parents like it when I engage the kids in activities while they are buying tickets.  That's because these kids have a load of energy, and because I get their attention, the parents can then take care of business.So, step by step.

  958 Posted by Meredith Newton
• By Meredith Newton

  Really coming out

  This week I will be calling my "new" doctor to schedule an appointment.  I really miss my other doctor.  She was not only a great doctor but also a very attractive black woman.  I wish I could look like her!I came out to another co-worker last night.  I was going to tell her last week when we were working the Zephyr alone.  She was totally cool about it, not to mention VERY supportive.  I always liked this girl because she is a free thinker, very much in her own little universe.  Josie met her when she first visted the museum.Speaking of the museum, they are treating me with kid's gloves these days.  I think they're afraid I am going to leave.  The VP herself wrote a glowing e-mail about me to my supervisor.  The VP got a chance to watch me in action and she thought I was the best.  My supervisors are also doing what they can to make sure I am assigned to certain daily activities they know I like, such as Pocket Science and the Petroleum Planet exhibit.  I especially love Pocket Science as I get to wander around the museum all day and play little science games with the kids.  The parents like it when I engage the kids in activities while they are buying tickets.  That's because these kids have a load of energy, and because I get their attention, the parents can then take care of business.So, step by step.

  Apr 06, 2008 958
• 24 Mar 2008
  Depression has lifted

  I just got done going through a bad period.  The depression that affected me for a few weeks seems to be leaving.  We are still in shock at work.  Last week, me, Robyn and Robert all sat there at lunch with tears in our eyes.  What used to be a sanctuary was so mercilessly taken from us.  Okay, maybe that was a little overly dramatic, but you have to understand that no matter how bad things got for me, I had two places: Trannyweb and the museum.  I was/am also dealing with some financial problems.  I'm also far behind on my writing contracts.  I'll get through it.  But all these things came together enough for people like Josie and Lilienne to note a change in my behavior.  I just was offered another part-time teaching assignment, which helped my mood.  The thing is, I first/last spoke to these people almost three years ago, just before I was kicked out.  After the separation, they called me three times within two days to tell me they had nothing for me.  Suddenly, a few weeks ago, they called me back and wanted to offer me a class.  It was a bit weird going back there when all I could do was associate our first meeting with just prior to the yearlong nightmare.I came out to more people at work.  One of them joined the site under the name Mary Mulberry.  I am also starting to get a little impatient about transitioning.  At the rate I am going I will be fully out at work very soon.

  1027 Posted by Meredith Newton
• By Meredith Newton

  Depression has lifted

  I just got done going through a bad period.  The depression that affected me for a few weeks seems to be leaving.  We are still in shock at work.  Last week, me, Robyn and Robert all sat there at lunch with tears in our eyes.  What used to be a sanctuary was so mercilessly taken from us.  Okay, maybe that was a little overly dramatic, but you have to understand that no matter how bad things got for me, I had two places: Trannyweb and the museum.  I was/am also dealing with some financial problems.  I'm also far behind on my writing contracts.  I'll get through it.  But all these things came together enough for people like Josie and Lilienne to note a change in my behavior.  I just was offered another part-time teaching assignment, which helped my mood.  The thing is, I first/last spoke to these people almost three years ago, just before I was kicked out.  After the separation, they called me three times within two days to tell me they had nothing for me.  Suddenly, a few weeks ago, they called me back and wanted to offer me a class.  It was a bit weird going back there when all I could do was associate our first meeting with just prior to the yearlong nightmare.I came out to more people at work.  One of them joined the site under the name Mary Mulberry.  I am also starting to get a little impatient about transitioning.  At the rate I am going I will be fully out at work very soon.

  Mar 24, 2008 1027
• 07 Mar 2008
  Getting by

  I have been back to working out again, although nowhere near as much as I would prefer.  The thing is, as I posted in the Forums, a long time back I bought a beautiful dress at the local resale shop without trying it on.  It looked like the right size, and wasn't.  I tried it on again last Saturday and it fit so well!  Yes!I am still stunned by what happened at work.  I talk to my former boss from time to time and he still can't believe the betrayal.  While we will still see each other around the museum all the time, they are breaking up our team.  I never thought I would be so lethargic about going in to the museum.  I still give the guests my best.  They are expanding our roles somewhat, which is good.  But this did take its toll on me somewhat.  Just ask Lilienne.I have an on-site interview with the Shedd Aquarium on Thursday.  This is the largest aquarium in the U.S.  I will be a Program Interpreter there as well, and handling various animals, including possibly tarantulas!  Oh, dear.....a psycho ninja and an animal with a painful bite.I interviewed with this one school almost three years ago, just before my ex kicked me out.  After the separation, and I was really struggling, they told me they had nothing for me.  I sent them an updated resume last summer.  Last week they called me and offered me classes.  While they pay next to nothing, it will help.I am going to make an appointment with my now new doctor, being that I have new insurance.  I need to get this going.As some of you know, two of my current coworkers are planning on a Euro trip in the fall.  Some of you are gracious enough to help us out.  You will not need to hide who you are.  By then they will know who I am anyway, so do not feel you need to pretend.Mere

  920 Posted by Meredith Newton
• By Meredith Newton

  Getting by

  I have been back to working out again, although nowhere near as much as I would prefer.  The thing is, as I posted in the Forums, a long time back I bought a beautiful dress at the local resale shop without trying it on.  It looked like the right size, and wasn't.  I tried it on again last Saturday and it fit so well!  Yes!I am still stunned by what happened at work.  I talk to my former boss from time to time and he still can't believe the betrayal.  While we will still see each other around the museum all the time, they are breaking up our team.  I never thought I would be so lethargic about going in to the museum.  I still give the guests my best.  They are expanding our roles somewhat, which is good.  But this did take its toll on me somewhat.  Just ask Lilienne.I have an on-site interview with the Shedd Aquarium on Thursday.  This is the largest aquarium in the U.S.  I will be a Program Interpreter there as well, and handling various animals, including possibly tarantulas!  Oh, dear.....a psycho ninja and an animal with a painful bite.I interviewed with this one school almost three years ago, just before my ex kicked me out.  After the separation, and I was really struggling, they told me they had nothing for me.  I sent them an updated resume last summer.  Last week they called me and offered me classes.  While they pay next to nothing, it will help.I am going to make an appointment with my now new doctor, being that I have new insurance.  I need to get this going.As some of you know, two of my current coworkers are planning on a Euro trip in the fall.  Some of you are gracious enough to help us out.  You will not need to hide who you are.  By then they will know who I am anyway, so do not feel you need to pretend.Mere

  Mar 07, 2008 920
• 23 Feb 2008
  I survived the purge

  A short time back I mentioned how my entire department had to reapply, and reinterview, for our jobs.  Just after I was promoted to full time, too.    I found out today that I am being kept on.  One of my coworkers, though, is being given the run around and told she has to wait until Tuesday to find out.  She quit today.  Her leaving like that was a blow to all of us.  Rosie is an older black woman, and was very well loved and respected.  When we left the afternoon meeting today barely a word was spoken by anyone.On Tuesday I have a phone interview with the Shedd Aquarium.  I sent them my resume when I thought things might really be going south with my museum.  I'll still talk to them, and if I can get in part-time I will take it, and retain my full-time status at my museum.I watched my kid quite a bit this week as she had the flu.  I swear, if I have watch certain shows again I am going crazy!  That means I had to keep a lot of my stuff locked up.  Oh well.Getting really tired and about to jump into bed.  More later.

  992 Posted by Meredith Newton
• By Meredith Newton

  I survived the purge

  A short time back I mentioned how my entire department had to reapply, and reinterview, for our jobs.  Just after I was promoted to full time, too.    I found out today that I am being kept on.  One of my coworkers, though, is being given the run around and told she has to wait until Tuesday to find out.  She quit today.  Her leaving like that was a blow to all of us.  Rosie is an older black woman, and was very well loved and respected.  When we left the afternoon meeting today barely a word was spoken by anyone.On Tuesday I have a phone interview with the Shedd Aquarium.  I sent them my resume when I thought things might really be going south with my museum.  I'll still talk to them, and if I can get in part-time I will take it, and retain my full-time status at my museum.I watched my kid quite a bit this week as she had the flu.  I swear, if I have watch certain shows again I am going crazy!  That means I had to keep a lot of my stuff locked up.  Oh well.Getting really tired and about to jump into bed.  More later.

  Feb 23, 2008 992
• 17 Feb 2008
  Meredith the Media Hog

  My new insurance just kicked in.  What I need to do now is to make an appointment with my new doctor and get the ball re-rolling with transitioning.  Fun stuff!My kid spent Friday night at my flat, and we did some running around Saturday.  We had such a good time.  It made me miss her all that much more.  We'll probably going to do that again this coming Friday.  I hadn't had a Saturday out like that in ages!I had to report to work earlier than usual this morning for part of our U-505 Behind the Scenes Tour.  I had no idea who the group was I would be taking through the boat.  Some press members were there.  Upon conclusion of my tour, which went well despite losing my voice today, a photographer for Wreck Diver magazine wanted some shots of me.  He mentioned how one of the people on my tour was none other than John Chatterton.  I went nuts.  He saw this and made sure I had a proper introduction to this amazing person.Chatterton is the central figure in Shadow Divers, the true story of two men who discovered the wreck of a U boat off the coast of New Jersey, and how they not only dangerously explored the wreck, but unlocked the mystery of its identity.  A documentary was made about this story. He was the nicest man!  He asked me for my card (don't have one!), and didn't have one of his own to give to me.  The photographer got some shots of us together, and it looks like I will be in Wreck Diver magazine coming up soon!  Although I am still nursing a cold, and had a bad voice, it put me in such a good mood.Lisa Snyder, an art and architecture historian at UCLA, has been developing this incredible virtual reality tour of the Columbian Exposition, the World's Fair, of 1893.  We had this at the museum as a very temporary exhibit this past weekend.  She was such a sweetheart!  When I spoke to her a second time later in the day I offered my services to help her even further with the project.  She immediately agreed, then said "You'll rue the day you said this!"  I can't wait.  This is a major historical project.  That means I might get out to L.A. more.  I do have to pay up my bet to Lilienne.First Japanese television, now UCLA, now the print media!  Not bad for a tranny who hasn't even begun to transition!

  881 Posted by Meredith Newton
• By Meredith Newton

  Meredith the Media Hog

  My new insurance just kicked in.  What I need to do now is to make an appointment with my new doctor and get the ball re-rolling with transitioning.  Fun stuff!My kid spent Friday night at my flat, and we did some running around Saturday.  We had such a good time.  It made me miss her all that much more.  We'll probably going to do that again this coming Friday.  I hadn't had a Saturday out like that in ages!I had to report to work earlier than usual this morning for part of our U-505 Behind the Scenes Tour.  I had no idea who the group was I would be taking through the boat.  Some press members were there.  Upon conclusion of my tour, which went well despite losing my voice today, a photographer for Wreck Diver magazine wanted some shots of me.  He mentioned how one of the people on my tour was none other than John Chatterton.  I went nuts.  He saw this and made sure I had a proper introduction to this amazing person.Chatterton is the central figure in Shadow Divers, the true story of two men who discovered the wreck of a U boat off the coast of New Jersey, and how they not only dangerously explored the wreck, but unlocked the mystery of its identity.  A documentary was made about this story. He was the nicest man!  He asked me for my card (don't have one!), and didn't have one of his own to give to me.  The photographer got some shots of us together, and it looks like I will be in Wreck Diver magazine coming up soon!  Although I am still nursing a cold, and had a bad voice, it put me in such a good mood.Lisa Snyder, an art and architecture historian at UCLA, has been developing this incredible virtual reality tour of the Columbian Exposition, the World's Fair, of 1893.  We had this at the museum as a very temporary exhibit this past weekend.  She was such a sweetheart!  When I spoke to her a second time later in the day I offered my services to help her even further with the project.  She immediately agreed, then said "You'll rue the day you said this!"  I can't wait.  This is a major historical project.  That means I might get out to L.A. more.  I do have to pay up my bet to Lilienne.First Japanese television, now UCLA, now the print media!  Not bad for a tranny who hasn't even begun to transition!

  Feb 17, 2008 881
• 22 Jan 2008
  Here we go again

  Some changes going on............For the moment I am going to have to put HRT on hold.  The reason for this is insurance.  I just found out my benefits as a now full-time employee and need to find out if I can keep my current doctors or find a new one.The Dirty Bird is no more.  The car hasn't moved in two months.  I had to have a car, and a coworker set me up with a friend who is a car dealer.  Although I do not need the financial commitment, I went ahead and got a new car.  Tomorrow they are sending a tow truck to take away the Dirty Bird.  It just wasn't worth putting any more money into it.The big thing is that at work we have to all re-apply and re-interview for our jobs.  Two weeks ago they made us sit through this 3-day nonsensical meeting in order to improve guest services.  Now what do they do?  They want to reorganize, and now demoralize, the very people who deal with the public on a daily basis.  Carlita told me not to worry.  However, this is not fun to go through.  They may in fact be downsizing.The thing is soon I will have to come out fully to everyone once I start HRT.  My coworker Sarah, who knows about me, is going to help me do it.Otherwise, I am hanging in there and ready to keep going forward.

  985 Posted by Meredith Newton
• By Meredith Newton

  Here we go again

  Some changes going on............For the moment I am going to have to put HRT on hold.  The reason for this is insurance.  I just found out my benefits as a now full-time employee and need to find out if I can keep my current doctors or find a new one.The Dirty Bird is no more.  The car hasn't moved in two months.  I had to have a car, and a coworker set me up with a friend who is a car dealer.  Although I do not need the financial commitment, I went ahead and got a new car.  Tomorrow they are sending a tow truck to take away the Dirty Bird.  It just wasn't worth putting any more money into it.The big thing is that at work we have to all re-apply and re-interview for our jobs.  Two weeks ago they made us sit through this 3-day nonsensical meeting in order to improve guest services.  Now what do they do?  They want to reorganize, and now demoralize, the very people who deal with the public on a daily basis.  Carlita told me not to worry.  However, this is not fun to go through.  They may in fact be downsizing.The thing is soon I will have to come out fully to everyone once I start HRT.  My coworker Sarah, who knows about me, is going to help me do it.Otherwise, I am hanging in there and ready to keep going forward.

  Jan 22, 2008 985
• 06 Jan 2008
  The New Year

  Lilienne, it looks like that latest good luck charm you sent me has worked again.  Since I already wrote about my job situation in the Forums, I won't rehash it here.  It's just nice to know that my hard work is paying off.  I might not be at the top of the world, I'm not at the bottom, either.  Compared to what life was like two years ago, this is amazing.Karen Brad wrote something interesting about my situation concerning being able to finance the transitioning.  My soon-to-be-ex just got a new job, and I am very happy for her.  I am still supposed to be on her insurance, since we are not divorced yet (and I do pay my portion), now I can have my own insurance.  We hope to get this divorce over with this year.  We've been getting along pretty good lately.  We do need to be good parents to our child, and being able to interact peacefully is part of it.But now with all these changes comes an even greater sense of independence and freedom.  I am starting to let on more and more at work about who I really am.  Until I start making that first all-important step with HRT I am still mostly keeping things quiet.  I would rather wait until I am on the path for certain than to mouth off and nothing should happen.  Concerning my life, this is the best way for now.I am hoping to get out to L.A. soon to visit Lilienne.  After all, I do owe her an outfit.  She told me to relax about her living near Rodeo Drive and that my bank account would not be drained.  I'm more concerned about what will happen when the two of us hit the kitchen and start cooking Thai food.Yesterday I was scheduled on the U-505.  I had this very nice family in line.  One of the kids was an eleven year old boy who had the first name as I do, when I am in drab mode.  I said "You can call me Meredith.  Or, Mere."  They thought it was funny.  And then they did call me Mere!I am about to head in to work now.  When my status officially changes to full-time tomorrow I will be back on five days.  I can now negotiate one weekend day off each week.  I've been working so much I can barely remember what it is like to look out my window over the lake.

  957 Posted by Meredith Newton
• By Meredith Newton

  The New Year

  Lilienne, it looks like that latest good luck charm you sent me has worked again.  Since I already wrote about my job situation in the Forums, I won't rehash it here.  It's just nice to know that my hard work is paying off.  I might not be at the top of the world, I'm not at the bottom, either.  Compared to what life was like two years ago, this is amazing.Karen Brad wrote something interesting about my situation concerning being able to finance the transitioning.  My soon-to-be-ex just got a new job, and I am very happy for her.  I am still supposed to be on her insurance, since we are not divorced yet (and I do pay my portion), now I can have my own insurance.  We hope to get this divorce over with this year.  We've been getting along pretty good lately.  We do need to be good parents to our child, and being able to interact peacefully is part of it.But now with all these changes comes an even greater sense of independence and freedom.  I am starting to let on more and more at work about who I really am.  Until I start making that first all-important step with HRT I am still mostly keeping things quiet.  I would rather wait until I am on the path for certain than to mouth off and nothing should happen.  Concerning my life, this is the best way for now.I am hoping to get out to L.A. soon to visit Lilienne.  After all, I do owe her an outfit.  She told me to relax about her living near Rodeo Drive and that my bank account would not be drained.  I'm more concerned about what will happen when the two of us hit the kitchen and start cooking Thai food.Yesterday I was scheduled on the U-505.  I had this very nice family in line.  One of the kids was an eleven year old boy who had the first name as I do, when I am in drab mode.  I said "You can call me Meredith.  Or, Mere."  They thought it was funny.  And then they did call me Mere!I am about to head in to work now.  When my status officially changes to full-time tomorrow I will be back on five days.  I can now negotiate one weekend day off each week.  I've been working so much I can barely remember what it is like to look out my window over the lake.

  Jan 06, 2008 957
• 21 Dec 2007
  More insanity

  Last week was my four year anniversary here at TW.  Wow.  As I've said before, it is amazing what life is like for me now as opposed to back then.I am going to utilize this vital contact Robyn Webb provided to me in order to make sure I can finally start my transitioning next year.  I am supposed to see the Endo in January.  I want to be on HRT as soon as possible after that.I could regail you with more museum stories.  I am getting a bit burned out, especially since we are starting some ultra-extended hours.  I'll get by.  Today I did assist in the location of a lost child.My car has been a paperweight for a few weeks now.  I think instead of putting more money into a car that old to just trade it in and get another.  That way I can get around to TG related appointments much easier.My blogs used to be much longer and more detailed.  Those will return when I can actually have a moment to breathe.Mere

  962 Posted by Meredith Newton
• By Meredith Newton

  More insanity

  Last week was my four year anniversary here at TW.  Wow.  As I've said before, it is amazing what life is like for me now as opposed to back then.I am going to utilize this vital contact Robyn Webb provided to me in order to make sure I can finally start my transitioning next year.  I am supposed to see the Endo in January.  I want to be on HRT as soon as possible after that.I could regail you with more museum stories.  I am getting a bit burned out, especially since we are starting some ultra-extended hours.  I'll get by.  Today I did assist in the location of a lost child.My car has been a paperweight for a few weeks now.  I think instead of putting more money into a car that old to just trade it in and get another.  That way I can get around to TG related appointments much easier.My blogs used to be much longer and more detailed.  Those will return when I can actually have a moment to breathe.Mere

  Dec 21, 2007 962